First of all -- my sympathies to you. I can only imagine how hard it would be to have my child marry someone who seemed to have no interest in our family. I hope that someday -- perhaps when there are grandchildren, or she just matures a bit -- that will change. I understand how you feel. And I understand the line you are trying to walk: you want to be polite and not unpleasant, but you don't want to be hypocritical. I urge you not to try to do that by being terse and distant yourselves, and certainly not in a toast. I fear it will backfire for you. Recently, our very close friends' daughter married a guy they don't especially like, and they really dislike his parents. At the wedding, the bride's brother gave a toast that sounded like he was trying to do exactly what you said you want to do, but his hostility and disappointment were obvious. It made everyone uncomfortable, it probably made his sister unhappy, and it made him look small and mean. The parents had as little to do with their new son-in-law's family as they could all weekend, and they refused to attend the reception his parents gave in their city. We who love them dearly are watching all this with alarm. They think they are being "true to their feelings." We all see that they couldn't be pushing their beloved daughter away from them more effectively if they were trying. Acceptance does work two ways, even if our child's spouse wouldn't have been our choice. Please don't let that happen with your son. A toast is like a eulogy -- it's not a time to focus on negatives, and no one thinks it's hypocritical to say nice things that may not quite be true. I would try to choke it back and make as warm and as nice a toast as I could. Start by thanking your hosts and saying how lovely everything is. Then thank all your family and friends from sharing this milestone with you. Now you're halfway through! But eventually you have to say something to the couple, I know. If you simply can't say that you love Petunia and you are so glad your son chose her, perhaps tell a sweet story about when he was a little boy, or pass on a story or bit of wisdom from your own marriage, or how you knew that he was in love with her, or something like that. Then wish them many years of health and happiness -- I assume you do wish that! -- and you are done. Good luck. I hope it turns out better than you fear.

Loved the pictures. I still haven't figured out how to post. I did everything you told me to but it didn't work for me. I guess I'll just have to find someone to show me. Trouble is, I don't have grandkids....I'll have to borrow someone else's.

I had a long test to run today with time to think so this was fun to work on :) "Ladies and gentlemen, 50 years ago today (if on the day) a flame was light (a candle lights itself) that still burns today. One day in 1958 (or the correct year if earlier), TDH decided to get a bite to eat. He checked his funds (MG pulls out his pockets showing they are empty. Maybe one pocket then has a hanky  long hanky trick. He could pull other "pulling out of pocket tricks" and comes up empty. He gets the Âidea look and pulls change out of various audience ears, counts the money.) Since funds were low TDH headed for the nearest White Castle. Where (he could don a wig for her part  maybe?) TDW was working her shift. (this would be a good place for the trick where eggs are cracked into a container then a duck (or other critter) comes out.) Smitten by her beautiful (eyes, smile, etc - if itÂs not a surprise, ask him) TDH asked her for a date (magic flowers out of nowhere) and she gave him a hamburger (makes white castle bag or burger appear) One thing led to another (a trick involving a repeating surprise here) and *correct time period* later they were wed. (a trick with rice or doves?) After a while ____ kids were born ( there is a trick where one of an item (cane, fan, etc) is waved and each time it becomes 2, 3 etc this could match the number of children  or if there were only one or two children do this for grandchildren). Bringing great joy ( a trick that makes people laugh, with balloons maybe - Followed by a trick that involves breaking something) most of the time. There were times of plenty (something appears) and times of penny pinching (it disappears). There were some Âspats" (IÂm stuck for a trick on this) and plenty of love (something heart shaped or romantic). Over the years they learned to balance life (Juggling if he does that) and to work together (the card trick with the names) and through it all, they kept it together (the rope trick where it gets cut up and made whole again)  and that is real magic. (Makes a full glass appear) and so I ask you to Join me in a toast to my aunt and uncle and their first 50 years of marriage."

There are two things that you all might or might not know about me. I am by training (and more importantly by nature,) a writer. I’m also a huge fan of an open mic. That one is harder to explain. I love to write stories, so the writing of this speech, or toast, or whatever you want to call it wasn’t hard. I read it several times before my wedding so that I would be comfortable with the delivery. But not enough so that it would sound rehearsed. There were a lot of tears during it, I’m told, (Including my husband) Yesterday morning, I sent a letter with a copy of this toast to the editor of the vows section of the New York Times. She replied within minutes saying that they loved this stuff. Also, she said she wished she had received it last week so that we could have been announced in Sunday’s paper. She also said that she wasn’t going to say “think of her next time, “ because as she put it, I’m pretty much set for life.” She wished me well with “that boy”. It was an absolutely lovely rejection. :-) Thanks guys for your kind words about my words.❤️ Jo