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Posted by monablair (My Page) on
Sat, Apr 26, 08 at 21:44

Some of the groomsmen will be in full dress Army uniforms.
Some will be wearing a Tux with lay down collars and long black ties.
Should boutonnieres just be eliminated? I don't believe they would be appropriate on the uniforms and I think it would look strange to have only 3 men with flowers on the lapels.

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: boutonnieres

I think that's a good plan.

RE: boutonnieres

If the father of the bride or the groom were one of the men in tuxes I think it would be ok to have him (or them)wear a boutonniere. And if the FOB is in a tux, and the FOG is in the tux, you could have them both wear one. But it should be small, perhaps a small closed rosebud with a small bit of greenery.

Congratulations, BTW! I was the lone female attendant in a military wedding many years ago (during the first Gulf War). The groom and groomsmen were a mix of Army, Marines and Air Force. One of the groomsmen had only been back from Kuwait for 3 days. The fathers (in tuxedos) wore boutonnieres, but the groom and groomsmen did not (it being a violation of the uniform rules, as you are probably aware).

Which exact uniform will the men be wearing? Just make sure you match the formality of the uniform to the formality of the other mens' tuxedos. The most formal uniform is the equivalent of white tie, not black tie. A tuxedo is the equivalent of mess dress, not full (evening) dress. This probably doesn't matter to most people, but a good friend of mine has been a military wife for over 15 years and I can tell you it matters to them. I know my friend would speak to her husband's CO's wife when she had questions about things like this. Perhaps you could consult that person?

RE: boutonnieres

Sue, you raise uniform questions we hadn't even thought about.
The tuxedos are 3 button, with notched collars because they are the most like the cut of the military uniforms. The wedding is a 2:00 afternoon wedding; does that enter into the choice of tuxedo style?

RE: boutonnieres


It used to be that black, bow tied tuxedos were only for evening weddings. But no one seems to follow that rule, if it even exists, in the civilian world any longer. But I think the bow tie is only used with the Army uniform for the most formal events and events that go into the evening (maybe a 5:00-5:30 or later wedding). I think having all the men wear the four-in-hand tie would look best. You just need to get the uniforms right and make sure everyone actually has the uniform (some enlisted may only have the green).

You didn't mention if this is a military wedding (either bride or groom is military) or if you just happen to have several groomsmen that are Army. If it is not a military wedding it is possible the rules are a little more relaxed and you can match the uniform to the tux as you see fit. I think you need to find out which uniforms they have so you know what you are working with. (The Army is also in the process of changing the uniforms)

Here is a link to a uniform company that describes the occasions for wear. Still confusing, but you can click on Army on the left, select male or female, then enlisted, officer, etc. That shows you what each uniform looks like.

I would find out what the men have and then speak to someone Army who knows the proper etiquette. If neither you or the groom are Army I would ask the wife of the most senior person ("senior" meaning rank) for her assistance.

Here is a link that might be useful: Uniforms

RE: boutonnieres

The groom is military and I believe all of the uniforms are the Officer's uniform style. My daughter says he selected the appropriate tuxes for the event and no one will have a boutonniere.
Thanks for the link.

RE: boutonnieres

Officers are required to have the blue uniform, so that does make it easier. I am sure it will be a beautiful wedding.

RE: boutonnieres

ooh, this is fascinating.

Regarding the bow tie:

"in practice Soldiers wear the black bow tie during very formal afternoon events, such as weddings, especially when the event extends into the evening hours."

Sue36, on that site, what does this mean: "to be worn after retreat."
Oh, wait, defines that as "evening social events."

So "before retreat" is while on duty?

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