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Introducing Families

Posted by carrieb (My Page) on
Sat, Mar 4, 06 at 18:08

So, fiance are getting married in September. We are both in our 40's and it is a first wedding for each of us.

It will be a casual, outdoor wedding with 100-150 guests, including a good number of kids.

He's got three brothers w/ wives & kids, I have a mom, stepmom and lots and lots of siblings, nieces, nephews, and great nieces & nephews. A big family on my side.

Even though we've been together for over two years, and we've both met each other's families, the families have never met. His family members live at least a couple of hours away from my closest family members.

I thought we should probably do a rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding so that they could at least meet before the actual day.

Fiance is uncomfortable with the fact that a dinner-the-night-before would require his brothers to rent hotel rooms. I'm fairly certain that the expense of hotel rooms would not cause a hardship for his professionally successfull brothers, but I respect that my fiance does not want them to have to do that.

Since the wedding is during the day, his brothers could drive there & back on the same day, but it would be a lots of driving for them to do that. I suspect that even without the rehearsal dinner, they may opt to stay in a hotel nearby.

Is it important for them to meet before the wedding? It is not really all that unlikely that they'll never have cause to meet again, so maybe them meeting is not so important.

What suggestions do you have?



Follow-Up Postings:

RE: Introducing Families

Why do you think your relatives will never have occasion to meet again? You're going to be family, after all. I hope you two will have many reasons to celebrate with your families in the years to come!

Maybe you could introduce some of the closest relatives to each other sometime between now and the wedding -- just get together for dinner or something. But if you don't want to do that, I wouldn't worry about planning an extra event for the sole purpose of everyone meeting one day before the wedding. Seeing as how they have gone all this time without meeting, I doubt it would make a big difference at the wedding if people had met just a few hours earlier. Your casual reception will be a nice place for them to get acquainted if you don't want to do so sometime before September.

RE: Introducing Families

I agree with Gellchom. if an opportunity for a casual picnic or something similar occurs during the summer, that would be a way for the two families to meet. Otherwise, meeting on the wedding day should be fine.

I also think that once people get acquainted, some of them will find common interests or business pursuits and there may be friendships that develop between members of the two families, as well as joint family events to be celebrated.

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