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| I would like a wedding coordinators opinion - is the following in bad taste? or am I too sensitive..my son was married a couple of months ago, i was seated in the back table at the reception, by the kitchen, and prevented from being in the photos. When I asked the wedding planner about pictures with the grooms family and the mother of the groom she said, not on the schedule! I was stunned. The night before he told me I was the best mother in the world, of course I had just deposited $10,000.00 in his account. A month before the wedding the bride sent me the dress she wanted me to wear, she got it for $50.00 off Amazon, she wore a $10,000.00 Vera Wang that my son bought for her. I knew she was controlling but i was always tried to see the good in her and accepted her. Now there are hundreds of pics online with her family - not one of me and mine .. They re indignant that I dare feel bad because I was seated in the back and didn't get my picture taken, They tell me that it was THEIR day and I should just keep my mouth shut..I didn't see it coming, although the bride said before the wedding that she thought me, a single mother, and my sons were too close..well, she's just done a great job of breaking that up. I feel completely shutout and it has been devastating.. |
Follow-Up Postings:
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| Sadly, it will be this way unless your son steps up and says something. If she is this controlling this marriage will probably end in divorce. I am sorry you are having to go through this. |
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- Posted by marie-ndcal (My Page) on Sat, Feb 9, 13 at 20:44
| Your are not senstive, just deeply hurt. It is too bad you gave him the money. At the reception, I would have moved and insisted that I be in some of the pictures, and if all else fails, remind your son that you just gave him 10,000.00 and if you are NOT in some of the pictures just walk out. But stand up for yourself, because sad to say your son didn't. What do your other children say? Don't give any more money and be vocal. Let them know how you feel. Change the locks on the house so they cannot get in to take whatever they want. Be firm!!! Even if your son trys to come to you with whatever excuse, tell him he must bring his wife with an apology. If you see the relatives on the street or???just smile and go on. Just reply, I am sorry, I cannot talk now. See you later and go on. I would be so mad I probably would yell and scream and cry. But then I can't imagine any of my friends to allow this to happen. |
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- Posted by scarlett2001 (My Page) on Mon, Feb 11, 13 at 3:03
| I really disagree very strongly with marie-ndcal's post. The OP is up against a very tough situiation and she has to act with as much maturity and tact as possible. Yes, by all means have a frank talk with your son and DIL. No "screaming and crying" etc. Tell them factually how you feel and specifically what happened at the wedding that hurt you. It may or may not open their eyes, but it will be out in the open. Changing the locks, cutting the relatives? Not necessary, IMHO. No need to drop the atomic bomb in the first skirmish of the war. Maybe there will not be a war, I hope. |
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- Posted by sweet_pea10 (My Page) on Fri, Feb 15, 13 at 12:50
| As a wedding planner, the comments made by the bride's wedding planner tell me that she was told by the bride what she was to do regarding your participation in photos and your seating. I am surprised that the photographer agreed not to take any photos with you. Most photographers would have at least taken some of you and your son. You really need to have a talk with your son and let him know how you feel. You were treated very rudely. If it were me, I would have either given the couple money early on in the planning or waited until after the wedding, then offered something. If you had given it afterward, you would have had the opportunity to gently tell your son that the choices they made were inappropriate and you can't support them. |
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