Mmm... nice: "Sitting in the room after having room service deliver my dinner and looking at a beautiful sunset is my way of relaxing." Maybe a little far, but I will have to look at that option! Joanie: I'm in Northern Virginia. How far to go? I would go as far as the West Coast, but don't want to go overseas (because of the extra travel time --would rather that time be spent at the location). Camlan: Have no problem spending time with the nephews -- on the contrary! They always make me laugh. (Until I get the dinner bill!) A few more details about me: Lived in Miami Beach, so I kinda got my beach fill there; Visited Sanibel -- is it basically the same as Captiva?; lived in Chicago, still love it -- looked quickly at New Year's week for a quick getaway, but really expensive (had I thought about that a few months ago, that would've been among the top choices); also have a niece in Boston, and the last time I was in Boston for more than a day, I was in either junior high or high school! But I think I'd want it to be during warmer weather. I do want to go to the aquarium there and maybe a day trip back to Cape Cod and go on one of the dolphin-searching boats I was on years ago. Haven't been to San Francisco -- does anybody have any rec's for someplace that's a cross between a hotel and a more relaxing veg-out "inn"? I know there are bed-and-breakfasts there, but the quality and experience would probably be wasted on me. (Hmm. I guess there are a few nice options on my list!)

Thank you! We are booked and I am so excited! St Petersburg for 6 days in a big house with my sailing friends and their families and then 6 days on Anna Maria island with just my immediate family. I would have reserved the Manasota Key one, I really liked it, but the rental agent was a bad communicator. On a funny note, we have decided to bring our cat. He is so tragically sad when we are away overnight that it would be comic, if it weren't so very tragically sad. He's not destructive or mad, just goes off his food and is lethargic and sometimes wails til he is hoarse. So we are driving 16 hours to Florida with our kitty in the car. When he's with us he's a perfectly content little guy. But we are going to start taking practice drives in the car. It was surprisingly easy to find a rental that would permit him.

Exactly, Lowspark. And you have to be honest, I think. If the man in that Carolyn Hax article had said, "We care about our grandparents, but we care more about having what we consider the 'perfect' wedding," I wouldn't have cared much for his values, but I would have valued his honesty. Though I'm with Gellchom and Tally Sue - his going on about being creative and special don't sit well with me. What I hear more often from people planning destination weddings are justifications. "It's a vacation for everybody," even though, as others have written, it's not much of a vacation if someone else chooses the date, time, destination, and companions. "I know that everyone we're going to invite can afford it," even though the people who say this are simply judging from the size/quality of the guests' house, car, boat, clothes, whatever. "Everyone would have to travel, anyway," even though hotel accommodations in one's hometown are likely to be less expensive than in the romantic resort destinations that are generally chosen for such weddings. (Plus, many families and groups of friends will provide accommodations in their own homes if the wedding is held in the home town of the bride or groom or in the town where they currently live. I know my own circle of friends did this for one another's weddings, and now does it for their kids' weddings.) And when you travel for a wedding, you're likely to stay over just one or two nights, not the longer period that most destination weddings seem to anticipate. I can understand a destination wedding like Scarlett's. If these few friends are the only ones that would have been invited to the wedding anyway, no matter where it was held, and if they could all manage to plan a vacation together and Scarlett and her husband got married in the process, that sounds great. The people who were hurt by not being invited would have been hurt no matter where she held the wedding, because they wouldn't have been invited anyway. Lowspark, I think what people having a reception in the groom's hometown have on their side is tradition. Even if they all lived in the same town, the groom's side sometimes holds a reception for the new couple if the bride's family doesn't choose to invite as many guests as the groom's family would like. Maybe a reception following the destination wedding will become tradition, as well, though (at least to me) it would feel like dividing your family and friends by income (the people who have money go to the destination wedding, the poorer people must content themselves with the home-town reception) rather than by closeness to the bride and groom.

Wow, JTerri, that does look nice. Looks like hotel developers noticed the same thing I did ... the hotel stock in most of the Keys is a little long i n the tooth and they need some new investment. OTOH I am reluctant to choose an unopened hotel and the last time I did so it was not finished in time! Anyway, the Eau Palm is booked already for the dates I want!? And my family thinks I am crazy for planning so far in advance.Hrmmph. Now I have my heart set on something with a fun, hip PB vibe like that. Which I find more on Air BnB. I don't care so much that they won't be oceanfront (we see plenty of that already) but worry they will flake on me in high season! Funny, Bonnie Ann, I remember being in KW and being told ... its only 90 miles to Cuba and it seeming soooo exotic. ETA ... OMG, look at this listing! I thought there was a person in the family room. I would never rent this unless it was dipped in Lysol first. https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/12782884?guests=8&s=EQGRvyCN