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myfampg

Do you help/encourage your child with gift giving for mom/dad?

myfampg
12 years ago

My daughter had asked me last week if she could get her stepsister a Christmas gift and wrap it to take it to dad's. I said of course! You may earn Money for Christmas shopping by doing additional chores and helping out. We made a list of 'acceptable' things she can do each day that I wouldn't normally expect of her... Like helping little brother clean his room before bed. Getting the mail every day. Straightening up in areas she is not normally responsible for.

I don't care what she spends the money on as long as she earns it.

So I asked if she had anything in mind.. Maybe a funny winter hat with a character on it. Or a snowglobe. She mentioned she would also like to get something for her dad. I told her that was also fine, again she needed to earn the money for any gifts and she needed to remember SM when shopping if she is shopping for dad and stepsister.

I had an idea for a photo album of this years pictures of JUST Dd. She could put it together herself. She isn't sure if she wants to do that. I also suggested framing her school picture we just got. She said she would think about it. I also mentioned to Dh I thought that he and I should send dd's dad and SM a holiday card, just from us, wishing them a happy holiday. This would be a gesture of kindness and a sign of acceptance of our situation and whether they toss it or keep it, who cares, it will fill my heart with what my heart needs.

My family thinks I'm nuts. 'dad can take Dd shopping for Sm and stepsister and Sm can take Dd shopping for dad'. Both of my parents say 'why would you do that they won't do it for you?' well... I don't care what I receive the point is, I feel making a kid gesture during the holiday, almost saying, hello- white flag, truce, I call mercy, I want to show in good faith that I'm accepting our situation and I'm not out to get your throat... But I've had mostly negative feed back. My Dh said if I'm that desperate to spend money to buy him a present with that money lol

I'm just wondering if anyone else does this.

FYI - before our major fall out a few years ago, we still help Dd shop for each other but I never included sm or stepsister bc they were not married

Yet and didn't live together (not a complete package yet). Last year I sent a card with Dd but she says she forgot to give it to them and I also let her get something for dad at the school holiday shop....

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