Our marriage is failing
anniegray
11 years ago
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Comments (12)
sylviatexas1
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agoRelated Discussions
Long-Lasting Potted Plant to Begin our Marriage
Comments (5)Congratulations on your upcoming marriage! You said: "they are providing some soil brought from their homes" Be very careful if you are choosing a container plant when using soil from the ground. I would only use token amounts of soil mixed with a good well aerated potting mix such as the 5-1-1 or even better the gritty mix found here on this forum. If you are new to container gardening then I would definitely choose a plant with a high survival rate when mistreated. One of the first plants we got in our marriage(25 yrs) was a golden pothos. I now have about 25 plants that I've cloned from that one plant. I'm a newb to container gardening so that means it had about 22 years of really bad neglect....under watering, over watering, no fertilizer for years, poor lighting, extremely bad potting mixes.....yet it survived somehow! My second choice for a flowering survivor is a dragon wings begonia that could be pruned and brought in for the winter. Full of blooms all spring, summer and fall and some in winter if it can get enough light. It could be divided occasionally and cuttings are easily rooted...See MoreBlessing of our Marriage Day!
Comments (3)It was a very relaxing, good food, family and friends and just perfect weather! The tents we boughts at Big Lots for $20 a piece and they stood up real well. We cooked BBQ, grilled chicken, corn, baked beans, other food, I baked 2 cakes, one for the blessing and 1 for my daughter's birthday; I made a special vegatarian dish for the minister sister in law; let the kids swim in the hot tub, my husband teaching our granddaughter how to do the fins up dance from Jimmy Buffet song. Everyone had a blast! Thanks, Brittsgrams...See MoreA Very interesting article thought I would share....
Comments (60)"I didnt say she posted the positive side, I said she posted a biased view, and the entire article had some other points. For example, where the article said SM was a bit of a misnomer, and it might be better for a SM to forget the mother in the name, and be more like an aunt." It did have other points you are right, but what is wrong with putting the ones on there that will lift the group. Also, I completely disagree with the act as an aunt role idea. I do not pretend to be the BM of my son, but at my home I AM the mom and I refuse to go back and forth between roles. This is easier in my family since my SS was young and excepting of me when DH and I got together. The aunt role would work better (IMO) for someone coming in later in the child's life. IMO I am a parent to my SS regardless of step or bio and I will act as such. "I do regard my DD as a victim of divorce. I am not aware of any study that doesnt put children of divorce at a disadvantage to children in intact families. And she certainly didnt cause the divorce". I did not say they are not victims. However, it is not a good idea, IMO, to go around considering yourself or your kids as victims, at least not to them, or they will always pitty themselves instead of learning from the situation that they have been put in. I agree that it is not fair to them and is definitely not an ideal situation to be in. I did say that with the way you and others act about second marriages it is almost like you are disregarding the fact that other children are born out of these second marriages and that they could be put in this situation to. Do you not understand that by constantly telling everyone that statistically they are more likely to fail than succeed in a second marriage it comes off as you almost hope we do, our kids bedamned. Also, I completely agree that kids of divorce are at a disadvantage to kids in a intact family. Unless, that intact family is an unhappy one in which they are better of in a divorce situation. "I think the point about second marriages failing is taken out of context. Its more about Dad should have more a role, as child may end up with serial SMs." You are generalizing here. Dads are not the only ones who do this. In fact, in my own person experience my DH and I have been together for quite a while and I was the first and only serious relationship he had after his divorce. His ex wife has been involved in a serious relationship off and on since right after they seperated. Between her and her long-time bf's fall outs she has had many bfs who my son has had to stay with, be babysat by, and all sorts of other situations where there were serial SDs....See MoreStepdaughter ruining our marriage
Comments (4)Sounds like your stepdaughter is NOT the problem and she is NOT ruining your relationship. Sounds like your husband is 100% the problem and your resentment is pointed directly at the wrong person. How are things when your stepdaughter isn't around? Does your husband still sleep all day when she isn't there? What is his work schedule? What time is he going to bed at night? My daughter is 10 and unless she is staying up all night, she does not sleep past 9 (at the latest on a weekend). And she is a sleeper. She has a very dark and cool bedroom and she sleeps very deeply. But she gets up before 9. So how much sleep is your sd getting at night? Is she staying up late? I think the way you dealt with the breakfast was fine. This is what I would have done too. Why didn't your sd stay home with her dad instead of having to get up and go with you? Could she stay with dad? Would it be easier on you? I can understand how Dh favoring her drives you insane... But as you said in your post, she didn't ask to be catered to or favored. He is doing a great deservice to her. He is teaching her how to grow up and be a big brat that feels entitled to be catered to by everyone in her life. You should suggest to your husband to read 'Love and Logic' I believe it is actually called 'Parenting with Love and Logic'. If he refuses, then you'll have to decide what you want to do with your future but if he can read this book. He will realize what he is doing to her and what he is also doing to his other children by treating them different. Good luck!...See Moremkroopy
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agosylviatexas1
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agoreadinglady
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agojustmetoo
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agomkroopy
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agosylviatexas1
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agoanniegray
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agocolleenoz
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agoreadinglady
11 years agolast modified: 9 years agojustmetoo
11 years agolast modified: 9 years ago
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