How to get rid of your step mom
stephater
11 years ago
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Comments (15)
justmetoo
11 years agoreadinglady
11 years agoRelated Discussions
Help w/order of steps to get rid of dandelions
Comments (7)Not knowing the weather you have, I would skip the initial starter fertilizer, and spray. Get the weed be gone concentrate and the dial sprayer that goes on the end of the hose. I say this as it would be quicker then individual spraying. One spray and the dandelions will be gone. You should see them dying within a day. As far as cutting, spray first then wait a couple of days then cut, that way there is more leaves to get the weed be gone on and you can see them. Watering shouldn't matter as long as the weed be gone has time to dry on the leaves, Remember if you follow what I say you're watering anyway. I will leave the time between steps to more experts, but if it was me, I'd wait a week since the initial spray. Bill...See MoreBio moms vs. Step mom (including TOW)
Comments (150)Point taken, wrychoice, this one does hit home and I'm having a bad day. I think what gets my dander up about hopper2008's posts is what other people have cited (the apparent arrogance and the striking need to prove herself superior, esp. to the former wife & kids), but perhaps I'm taking it more personally because of my situation. The only other thing I really reacted to that other people hadn't already mentioned as irritating is the projection factor. That is, hopper2008 making it out like SD is the one being childish, unreasonable, immature, insecure and manipulative about this situation. Which may very well be the case, but if hopper2008 isn't in some way, at some level, tugging the other end of the rope, then it's a non-issue. If it's a non-issue, then Hopper2008 would simply make sure her husband knows it's okay for him to go to his daughter's wedding without her (and doesn't stand on any principle or misplaced idealism about unity, loyalty or whatever and create a very difficult situation for DH and SD on her wedding day b/c she can't face the reality that she and SD simply don't get along and pushes it at the wrong time & circumstance.) I guess I reacted especially much to the projection aspect because my Dad's wife plays that game of telling herself & other people similar things (i.e. "whatever HE wants to do"; "HE's choosing to do such-and-such"). It's crap, don't buy it if you ever hear this sort of thing. No parent except the lowest form would EVER so quickly and unequivocably "choose", "freely", to leave their kid in the lurch, even if said kid was being a brat. These husband/fathers DO NOT WANT TO TURN THEIR BACKS ON THEIR CHILDREN and they DO NOT do so easily. I mean, unless they are scum, in which case I'd have to ask why anyone would want to be with scum like that. These men (or women, when it's women in these situations) may seem like they are "choosing", but they are BACKED AGAINST THE FRIGGIN' WALL and make these apparent "free choices" under tremendous duress of one sort or the other. For example, I know this because my Dad got me a plane ticket to visit him behind my SM's back (via money order) and always calls me when she isn't around; he called NINE TIMES on and around X-mas ---when she was out--- because he felt so guilty about telling me I couldn't come. Because it wasn't what HE wanted. I know for a fact that SM was telling people "he decided" to not have me there, b/c he was so "disappointed" in me, or whatever the H3LL.... Meanwhile, these "independent decisions" of his always seem to benefit SM, for example HER sister and brother-in-law were there at Christmas in my place, and she got some home improvements done (FOR her not BY her, to be sure). My SM isn't fooling anybody! (Well, I can't say that.... she's not fooling ME and several others ---including my Dad--- but maybe she's fooling somebody somewhere.) In this kind of scenario, if a parent seems to be making a choice to turn their back on their child ---especially on a really important or significant occasion like a wedding that they would otherwise never want to miss--- and their spouse is acting all "my dog ain't in that fight", or more obviously, even GLOATING about the parent's "choice": look closer, ask some more questions. Barring possible reasons such as the most scummy good-for-nothing parent or child on the planet, in most average situations with average people with average issues and flaws, there is more going on than meets the eye. It's more than one person tugging the rope. One way or another, the spouse is also manipulating the situation, or at the very least, is getting a big payoff (emotional, financial, circumstantial, etc.) from just "sitting back" and 'watching" the fight. Saying things in plain English (i.e. "don't go to your daughter's wedding without me or I will be very upset and might divorce you") is only one possible method of getting one's point across. Other methods include: -The Silent Treatment -Sexual Freeze-Out -Generally Being a Stone-Cold B***h Until He Changes the Situation to Your Way -Acting all Hurt and Crying ("Why Doesn't SD Love Me?!?!") to Play the Victim -"Forgetting" to Do Something You Promised (such as get groceries to have food in the house) So He Gets the Hint You're Not Pleased About X situation -"Forgetting" to Give Him His Prescription Medications That You've Made him Dependent On You For So He Gets the Hint... (a favorite tactic of my SM's; actually all of these are) ...and there's probably myriad other sick, twisted ways of controlling a situation that aren't even occuring to me because I'm just not that perverse. (Would have to get in that Stephen King "Misery" headspace to comprehend it more thoroughly.) Admittedly I have some bitterness about my personal stepfamily dynamics (on one side of the family anyways), but apart from any offense it gives anyone, I hope that at least hopper2008 and perhaps anyone else who feels they relate to her will perceive in my words the effect that her apparent attitude may inspire in an SD in that kind of situation. And to just be careful, as kkny said, about the hubris factor. It's humbling to hear it, but hopefully it puts things in perspective b/c it's never a good idea to go around thinking of oneself as being perpetually in a catbird seat. Not with the way our society and relations between men and women tend to go. Plus I think it's good 'tactical' advice, to be kind of Sun Tzu about it: a strategic choice to 'lose the battle' (over being at the wedding) in order to 'win the war', or at least *appear* the bigger person and pre-empt any feeling DH might develop about being on a leash and starting to resent it. (Men tend to wriggle out of a leash millimeter by millimeter... you don't see it coming, and then poof! They're gone! Or even worse, they stay...) This particular advice isn't meant to be about pleasing the man, or the SD, but covering your own behind and not thinking you're invincible or always going to win.... or even always going to be around! So picture the points I made in my last post but with a bit less 'edge'... and hopefully it's illuminating....See Morestep mom/step daughter
Comments (3)I agree, she's a teen and she'll do it on purpose for a rise, The best thing is to ignore when she does these littel traps. Walk away and focus on the other 3. She'll also pit the other 3 kids against dad...just give them more attention when she gets into her emotional trips. Its hormone age, its testing their limits. .....and i'm sure underneath it all she is pist off her biomom is what she is. My stepdaugther has been trying this. But thank GOD my dh sees the games and sets her straight. He calls her on it immediately! He's told her in the last few months he will not tolerate games and using other people to get her way. TIs manipulative and he wont give into her if she uses underhanded tactics. So the last time she came she was very respectable. BUt its up and down wiht teens. And its normal for them to be that way. I went through it. I was not a joy for my father and my sm has the patience of a saint. So just hang in there....when she tries to start fights, call on it , head on! Tell her ...no, no...you want a fight, fight with yourself, i will not be bothered to waste my time. and walk away....See MoreHow to get rid of bull ants in your house
Comments (9)This is a recipe that was given by the head groundskeeper of the Parliament Buildings in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada. It uses somewhat what Daisy referred to...only use boric acid....bought at any drugstore. To two cups (450 millilitres) of boiling water, add two teaspoons of boric acid, and two cups (450 grams) of granulated sugar. (I know how to measure metric...but I'm still not used to writing about it) Stir to dissolve sugar fully. Let cool. Then, into a small container....much like a margarine container, you put holes at the sides at the bottom to let the ants enter. Into the container you place about 6 cotton balls (also bought at the drugstore) after soaking them in the solution. Put the lid on to prevent other insects such as bees from entering. Then place the containers where you see the trails or mounds of ants. The idea is for the sugar to be the come-on...the boric acid the killer. The worker ant takes the liquid back to the nest and feeds it, like a good ant will, to Queenie.. she gets a terrible tummy ache....and the colony dies with her. Any pointed shoe can kill an ant in the corner...it takes a wise wearer to know how to kill hundreds without putting your foot down. Anyway, its supposed to work on the feared RED ANTS of southern U.S. so I cant see where an Ausie ant's stomach is any less upsetting. Now there are a few more suggestions and they are talked about widely whether they, in fact, work or not. Grits....that southern U.S. morning food.....tastes like bland cream of wheat... well, this stuff expands when moistened and figuring an ant's stomach has such acid, it suggests when an ant eats the grits, the stuff explodes inside its stomach. Another one....make the ant cross through some baking soda. He gets it on his feet (or whatever an ant calls his feet), some of it gets into his mouth...and the old story.... when baking soda gets wet it turns into carbon dioxide.... GAS that is....and since an ant cant burp, cant flatulate, he goes all to pieces. Anyway, that's the theory....See Moresylviatexas1
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