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Good deed with a potential problem....

Posted by mom2emall (My Page) on
Thu, Nov 5, 09 at 12:10

So the other day ds was talking to his gma on his dads side and saying how he would like to visit her (she lives 6 hours away). He mentioned Christmas time to visit her, but we have things planned during Christmas Vacation that the kids do not know about yet (its part of their Christmas present).

So I called his gma back later and told her I knew how much ds wanted to visit her and that coming up soon he has a long weekend off school because of parent/teacher conferences and teachers institute. So he will have 3 days off school in a row and then the weekend. I told her if she was interested I could meet her half way for pick-up and drop-off. She was all for it and we scheduled it. She already has stuff planned for them to do for the time ds is down there visiting.

Now this is where the problem comes in. My ex is carless right now and ds was telling him on the phone the other day about visiting gma and telling his dad he should take off work and come with! He told his dad I am driving 1/2 way to meet gma.

I am hoping that my ex can not get off work. If he does I do not want to drive him! Me and DH were going to drive ds there and it would make things really awkward! My dh is nice to my ex, but really does not like/trust him because of his issues a few months back. He would not be okay with driving my ex. What should I say if my ex asks about going??

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: Good deed with a potential problem....

No good deed goes unpunished...

You could say that you wouldn't be comfortable with that, so if Dad wants to go, he'd need to rent a car. (Though if money is the reason for the carlessness, renting a car would not be feasable.)

Or ask GMa to drive all the way?

Or suggest that Dad take a Greyhound bus "so he doesn't have to miss quite so many days of work" since you know he needs the money.

Or take a deep breath and do it because you're a really good person.

RE: Good deed with a potential problem....

I would drive my ex and he would drive me, i don't see how it is a big deal. but your DH is not obligated to drive ex. you can just tell ex that your DH doesn't feel comfortable.

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