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Halloween & other musings

Posted by lovehadley (My Page) on
Sun, Nov 1, 09 at 11:15

We had a great time! I am absolutely loving the new holiday schedule that's in the parenting plan.

From the time SS was 2 until just this past summer, DH & BM split ALL the holidays 50-50. And by split, I mean, he would be with BM for a couple hrs and then DH for a couple hrs. On Halloweens in the past, whoever's "day" it has been had SS second. So, last yr, for example, it was DH's day, so BM had SS first from about 5-7 pm. Then DH picked him up and brought him home and we trick or treated around 7:30 pm. But the crappy thing was, by that point, SS was always tired of trick or treating and not much into it the second go around.

In other yrs, we've had him first and had to rush, rush through trick or treating so he has time to get to BM's.

It makes it NO FUN for anyone, really---not DH, not BM, not me, not DD, and mostly, not SS!

What was really interesting this year was the fact that SS just had a total blast! For the first time ever, he was able to relax and just ENJOY the night. And it was SO wonderful for DH to not have to leave the festivities in the middle to either take SS to BM's or go pick him up.

There is so much to be said for SS being able to be present in the moment. He was 100% last night and it was just fabulous--we went to a party w/friends from DD's school. There were 8 kids, 10 adults, and we had a blast, trick or treating, eating yummy food, and sitting around the firepit. LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT.

SS will be with BM for Thanksgiving this year, which will different for us, as we usually ALWAYS get him from 3 pm on. But you know---I think it will be BETTER. It might be a little sad this year without seeing SS at all on turkey-day, but at the same time, that means HE will have a good time at his mom's, and be able to enjoy it with her/that side of his family. And NEXT YEAR it will be our turn for Thanksgiving.

It's just nice to see things working out well.

How was everyone's Halloween? What did you all do?

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: Halloween & other musings

I hear you about the holiday thing. My biggest gripe has always been Christmas. We have my SS's in the afternoon, and the Ex has them for the morning or vice-versa. So, on our Christmas morning, we scramble to open presents, they have no time to play with them, then we scramble to get them to her on time. If she has them in the morning, our son gets to open part of his presents, then we go get his brothers, come home, open more presents, then head out to DH's parents, open more, and the whole day is just frantic. NOT a nice, happy holiday. Switching years is really the best, and I'm glad you had a great time this year. My SS's were with the ex this year, so it was just us and our son. We still had fun trick or treating.

RE: Halloween & other musings

Splitting Christmas is tough, too! :( I feel for you.

In the past--BM has had SS EVERY YEAR for Christmas Eve b/c that's when her family celebrates.

It's been kind of annoying b/c DH has NEVER had the chance to have SS wake up to presents from Santa at our house!

This year is the first Christmas w/the new parenting plan and the way it is this time is that BM will get SS from the day school gets out (I think the 19th?) until 10 AM on Christmas morning. Then we get him until 9 AM on the 31st, and then BM gets him until school goes back in session.
The next year it will reverse.

There is just so much to be said for there being NO argument and no discussion--the plan spells it all out, and it is what it is.

RE: Halloween & other musings

I hope everyone had a great Halloween, and I hope future plans for holidays work out.

RE: Halloween & other musings

My little guy went as Batman and had a good time. First he went to a Halloween party with some classmates. He went out with another family last night so I could stay home and pass out candy. DH watched baseball and munched on Halloween candy.

We had to skip Halloween last year so it was heartwarming to see him have so much fun.

RE: Halloween & other musings

My Halloween was pretty cute:

I stopped doing Halloween several years ago, when I opened the door & 4 enormous teenaged boys grabbed the candy bowl & took every piece & skeered the bejeebers out of me.

but Saturday I...forgot.

& when I went to work, I turned on the porch light so I could see when I returned home after dark.

On Halloween, my neighborhood is a reincarnation of Mayberry or Leave it to Beaver or something:

there are a zillion twinkly fairies & butterflies & princesses & wizards & cowboys, &, since we're outside the city limits & there are no street lights, everybody's mom or dad (or maybe lovehadley if she doesn't have to make cupcakes!) drives them out to the neighborhood & creeps along in the car.

& a couple of churches or scout troops have pick-up trucks pulling flatbed trailers filled with the aforementioned twinkly fairies etc.

My house is only about 1/2 a mile from the intersection, but I got there at a speed of 4 to 6 mph.

& when I arrived, there were a half dozen kids on my front porch, & the tallest one, maybe 9 or 10 years old, had his ear to the door.

He was saying, "I don't hear anything but dogs."

so I came up & apologized & told them that I didn't have any candy, I'd forgotten to leave the light off, etc, & he looked at me with these big blue eyes, & he said....

"You *tricked* us!
but that's okay, we forgive you."

& off they went!

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