'Disabilty benefits' is a broad statement. Is she receiving temp benefits or actually qualify for longterm? Either way, you can report fraud/abuse via the social security adminisration (easy as google).

Secondly, a truly disabled person may be able to drink/drug and still be very legally disabled. Actually if the system says she qualifies legally and meets all guideliines, YOU get no say in how she spends her received funding.

Not saying this lady may not be perhaps legally abusing rights to a benefit (that is not for you or I to decide)...what I am saying is if she truly qualifies there may be nothing you can do about how she spends it. You can report her, but that will not automatically end her benefits if she is receiving them legally based on her medical conditions and rules and regulations.

'She says' may not be actual happening events either. KWIM? When she put these children on and they may have been approved she would also have had to enter their birth data SS# ect. The SSA can 'see' how old her children are. The family would have been notified upon ending parts of benefits as each child would have been disqualified.

In other words, just because 'she says' does not mean she is getting what she is getting due to why she thinks she is getting them...she simply may not understand her benefits and what/why she gets x amount.

Google...it's your friend.

Thanks for the reply. Main reason I've never reported her before is I just didn't know the legalities behind it and honestly like you say, their ages and social security numbers have to be there when she reapplies monthly or quarterly.

I just get fed up that my husband and I completely support their last child who lives with us and she does nothing to help him financially. When asked, she never has the money. But yet she can use his social to get benefits. He's 19 and in his last year of high school. She has paid not 1 dime towards him and I have been with my husband since 2008. He is always asking for money despite having a part time job and whenever he visits the useless excuse for a mother she takes his money.

She has made it known to her children the pain medication she receives is worth a lot on the street so she sells it on the streets. For someone whose disability is so bad they can't work you'd think they'd take their pain medication but I guess risking going to prison is more fun.

Since I've known my husband, she has had various jobs..but yet claims she's disabled. She quits due to 'unfairness' or that someone is screwing her over somehow..last job she 'quit' was because she robbed the place.

Yet....she's disabled. Claims some boxes fell on her back in 2007 and injured her back. Nothing showed up on the xrays but she claims she's in constant pain. Yet sells her pain meds on the streets...and robs employers.

Anyway..enough said. Just another worthless piece of s&%t getting away with fraud.

Thanks again for the reply! :)

While I know it's frustrating to see someone who doesn't deserve disability benefits get them, you can't let this consume you.

Like JMT says what she says and what actually is the truth may be two different things. How do you know so much about her disability and that she robbed the last place she worked at? If she's telling you these things, she may be trying to upset you. If your husband is telling these things he may be exaggerating to make people feel sorry for him. I'm just saying, unless you're getting this information first hand, you don't know what the real story is and you can't let yourself get worked up over something that may not even be the real situation at all.

If she's telling you these things I'd suggest not talking to her anymore. You don't need to hear them, it's only going to upset you. The eldest son is in his last year of high school, it will soon be over. If he's asking for money let your husband deal with that.

You can choose to let this bother you, or you can choose to enjoy life with your husband. There are tons of people out there committing some kind of welfare or disability fraud, you can't let it eat you up inside.

Hi Amber! :)

The only reason I know so much about her disability is my stepson had me read over the paperwork before he mailed it for her. When I asked him what I was looking at he told me he had to make sure all T's were crossed and I's were dotted so his mother would get all her money. Just came and handed it to me one day out of the blue. He was worried to death she was going to miss out due to her now having cancer..which she does not. Just another lie to get her kids to feel she is so helpless. Her own brother informed my husband that she has no cancer of any kind and knows she is in fact lying about that.

As for the last place she worked at being robbed..she was caught on camera. Spent time in jail for it. But told her kids she was away at a sick relative's house for the 30 days she had to serve. When a family member came across the film footage of it...voila...by this time she had told her kids that she quit that job due to out of control stress put on her by her manager.

And of course..despite the filming of the robbery...her kids say the company is to blame.

Her kids feel this woman is the end-all, be-all of all parents. She has stolen from them, set up utility accounts that she let go in their names while they were toddlers, set up bank accounts and has HUGE past due bank fees all over the state..also set up in their names while they were toddlers...

The end for my husband was when they lived out of state..she came home with a ludicrous story that she had been robbed while taking the night deposit to the bank for the gas station where she worked. They were having so many problems he immediately became suspicious..the next morning he found hundreds of dollars WITH the deposit slip in her purse. His suspicions were dead on. He acted like he didn't see it and called the police to have them come over. He then played dumb while they took their time arriving...by the time they did she had the money gone and hid and a huge goose egg on the top of her head where she had been 'beaten' as they took the money. She told the cops my husband was nuts and had no idea why he would accuse her...she had called the cops on him before and they took it as a domestic fight. She had reported the money gone the night before and the cops had already been to the gas station and put it off to a robbery.

Basically the woman is nuts...and her kids are all for it. Trust me..all this doesn't come from her..I avoid her like the plague. Her kids tell everything..and from what I've seen they pretty much are spot on.

Oh well...just a worthless loser trying to make it in this world I guess.

:)

Oh my, sounds like a real upstanding person (snark).

If you have reason to believe she is being abuse/committing fraud on a legal basis whether on federal and/or state benefits you can report her and they will investigate if they find reason to believe there is genuine merit in compliant in their rules/guidelines. Please realize that a compliant stating she spends all her benefit funding on alcohol is not a 'fact' the SSA can pursue. Not saying that there may not though be an agency like your local law enforcement interested in a compliant like selling drugs on the street :) Again, google can help you find the right places to report possible abuse/fraud, illegal activities.

--" He is always asking for money despite having a part time job and whenever he visits the useless excuse for a mother she takes his money."--

I doubt there is anything you can do about your SS giving his earnings to his mother. Terrible thing for her to ask the kid to do...go to work and give me your money. Dh might be able to discuss with SS that handing his earned wages over to Mother is not something the kid has to or should be doing. But then again, if the kid earned the money on his own, it is his money to do with what kid pleases. Sad. Dh can also stop handing out extra money to the kid. Why hand the kid money if he is then giving it to his mother? Dh is not a bank. Dh does not need to be giving extra handouts to the kid. I'll assume you provide the roof over his head, his healthcare, his meals blah blah blah. Those things are expected expenses...handouts for extras is not. If the kid runs out of 'spending' money because the kid is giving his money away...these are things Dad can dicuss with SS. No more handouts. No more extra money on top of kids wages. Put the kid on a budget. Something like 'this is what I (Dad) pays for, this is what you (kid) pays for, this how much money you (kid) have to work with and that is all you (kid) get'.

As far as getting Mom to help with child expenses, well you are likely out of luck there. If she is suppose to be paying some type of child support due to the kid still being in high school and is failing to pay her court ordered requirement, that would be a court issue husband could pursue.

But it all sounds like you/husband got stuck with a low life mother that is not only taking advantage of government benefits unethically but also her children, but unless there are broken rules/guidelines in the benefits she's getting, not much can be done about it. Husband can though talk to kid about giving kid's wages to Mom. And Dad can put a stop to giving kid extra money.

I wouldn't worry about it. It has bothered me for years that my SD12's BM has never worked a day in her life. She has gone from her mom, to her DH (that she is still legally married to), to her mom, to living with my DH, back to her mom & now living with her BF. She has made a baby with each of them... her mom raised the first kid, DH is raising his, and who knows about the new baby... from what I hear, everyone takes care of him but BM uses him as an excuse why she can't work now. It finally sunk in my head that nothing I do, think or say is going to change how she is... she is not going to run out & get a job or become responsible because of me. I have some resentment that I work 7 days a week (about 67 hours) and juggle that with taking care of a toddler (DGS2) and raising HER daughter that she has groomed to dislike/disrespect/hate me, while she sits on her lazy butt playing farmville all day and dodging her child support.

The realization that I came to is that her life is pathetic. At the moment, she appears to be having lots of fun.. she goes camping, takes trips, sleeps in, plays on her computer, etc. But... the day of reckoning will arrive for her. She will get old. She may suffer health problems from her smoking & drinking. She will have to sort out the pain she is causing her daughter. and there will come a time when she no longer has her mom or a man to fall back on... and she will probably lean on her kids to take care of her. To me, that is pathetic. That is sad for her, it is sad for her kids.

I have raised my kids, trying to instill a strong work ethic & motivate them to be independent. I am working to build my own future so that when I am old and can't work, I won't have to rely on them.. or even my DH. I want my kids to feel free to have their own lives & not worry about me.

In the past, I've talked about my mom & her alcoholism. Dad divorced her when I was 13-14. I stayed as "caretaker" and endured hellish teen years. In the almost 30 years since they divorced, my mom has not worked a real job, has not accomplished anything or had a significant relationship. She was recently diagnosed with cancer, had a 5 point heart bypass surgery after a heart attack a little over a year ago & had to have a pacemaker put in a few months ago. She has deteriorated very quickly & we don't know if she will make it another year. It breaks my heart because she is my mom & she has not taken care of herself... now she is paying the price for the years of abuse and neglect she inflicted upon herself. I've had my own resentment for things she did and even so, I still love her and it is hard to see her go through this.

Personally, if I were you.. I would not concern myself over what your DH's ex does. She is making her bed, she will lie in it. She may drag her kids to lie in it with her but that is between them, it has nothing to do with you. You have a choice to help or not help these adult kids. What their mother does or doesn't do for them is not your concern. Do what you want for them because you want to & can. As for the fraud... if she is committing fraud, it may come back to bite her. I worked in the welfare office & had people confess to me that they were committing fraud but the DH never prosecuted them. It is very frustrating to see your tax dollars wasted and programs that are meant to help people, being abused by people that don't really NEED them. But, anyone that lives on a program, becomes dependent on that program and is at the mercy of the government... and if they cut funding or benefits, they live with the impact of that. It is a horrible way to live... and it's never enough to live a good life so many of them cheat. Again, in the end it will come back to bite her in the butt.

Having worked in healthcare for the past 5 years and having worked at times for a pain management dr, I can tell you that if she is on a narcotic pain medication prescribed by one of these types of doctors, they perform random drug screens on them. They know exactly how much of the drug is supposed to show up based on their prescribed dose. If that amount is too much then they are abusing their drug, if it's not enough they are selling it. They will be "fired" as a patient from their doctor. Our patients have to sign contracts before getting these medications. They do not get more if they run out. Also, we check with all other pain management doctors in the area before taking them as patients, if they've had problems in the past we find out and may not take them as a patient or make sure they know what they are getting into. Also, my own primary care physician has caught one of his patients lying to him... when he referred this patient to pain management and that office knew the patient had a history. I was working in my doctors office that day and heard him yell at the patient to get back in his room. Our emergency room WILL NOT prescribe narcotics to people just for walking in "in pain", nor will they prescribe xanex. The drug seekers get caught eventually. I registered one just yesterday that was shaking because of being out of xanex.... I knew he wasn't going to be getting what he wanted. Too bad, so sad.

I too wonder sometimes why someone has medicare as their insurance when they are in their 30's.... they come in and the nurse asks them their medical history and you hear them say none. It's so disturbing. Like Ima said, they will end up with a life you don't want to live. Don't worry about her. Don't worry about her kids.