As challenging as it is, your best option is to detach from all of these issues. You said in your letter you will no longer participate in drama games. Now you have to follow through.

"Detach" doesn't necessarily mean no contact. It does mean in whatever contact you have, you act in the way most comfortable and "right" for you without concerning yourself with their response. You are not responsible for your SDs or your husband, only yourself.

I would not write any more letters (I wouldn't have written that one either, but what's done is done.) and I wouldn't ask any more questions or complain to your husband.

You've had years to figure out none of those strategies get you anywhere. In fact, any attempt to engage just feeds their egos and sets you up for further ridicule.

If there are future encounters, before they occur try to run through in your head what might happen and plan a response. In other words, role play, so you know in advance how you're going to handle it. I'm sure you know the drill well enough to figure out what these women might do.

Also, try to think of responses totally different from your usual. Don't act hurt. Don't act as if you care at all. You're not part of this game anymore and it matters not at all what they do.

At first this may require some good acting but in time it will become second nature. You know the saying, Fake it until you make it.

And the deviled eggs? If SD pulls something like that just say, "Oh, I see you have deviled eggs. I'm so glad I brought a cooler. I'll just put these back in the car to snack on later."

See what I mean? They've had the upper hand far too long. It's time to turn the tables.