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twinkl_gw

New here...need advice.

twinkl
14 years ago

Hi, I am 30, moved 1,000 miles to be with DH two years ago, we got married about 6 wks ago. We've lived together for the past year and a half.

He has 2 kids 5 and 7 from previous marriage (5 has autisum). BM just moved 4.5 hrs away; before that we got them 4 days every other wk. She tells the 7 year old negative things about us. Not sure how often and to what extent, but we know it's happened b/c he's told us.

Needless to say, my relationship with SS7 hasn't been great. And it's taking a toll on myself and DH.

Most recently they visited for the first time in about 5 wks (this is not typical b/c of our wedding, another trip). So when SKs arrived, 7 year old didn't look at me but spoke to aunt/uncle, grandpa and my DH who were all here for his b-day. It really hurt me, and things haven't gone well since.

Then BM called at last minute last wk and asked DH to drive the 5 hrs to get them. I asked DH to wait and get them the next day b/c he'd been gone all wk; I had a bad wk including some medical things and I wanted to be with him that night. But he went and got SKs instead. Needless to say, things haven't gone great since. We've fought about 5 days out of the last wk.

Little history, I've admittedly had problems adjusting to my new LIFE here, including the stepkids. So it's not been an easy road for any of us. But I did feel I made progress until the past few wks.

I'm just worried that it won't get better. It's sad to me that this is our life 6 wks after marriage. I feel like I'm back to square 1 and feel like I've lost the courage to be a stepmom. Plus, keep in mind I have no support system b/c I moved away from my family and friends to be with him.

Help. I don't know what I'm looking for, just stressed, confused and depressed. I miss having a family that I feel loved and accepted from. I don't get that when the kids he had with another woman are here.

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