Frank, she's already a beauty, and she's not fully open! Just wait until all the buds open! As I said, it was one of my favorites! Very prolific bloomer... although, all my attempts at pollinating failed. I'll catch it next bloom cycle. Sweet Lilian also proved to be very photogenic! I took the most photos of this particular variety. Viagrow... hahaha! So, what happens if the stem is erect for more than 4 hours? Should you consult a horticulturist? LOL! Larissa, in today's world, you sort of have to help your kids develop a thick skin so they're ready for whatever life throws at them. We're the type of parents that never shielded our kids from the uglier side of life... we were always very open, encouraging them to question the world around them, and to discuss things they weren't sure about. Life is tough... kids need to develop good coping skills! One of our favorite lines was, and still is: Life is full of choices... for every choice there is a consequence... think hard before making your choices! When our kids were teens, our house was the favorite hangout... there were always other kids at our house. They would all come over after school and hang out, play video games, listen to music... my fridge got a ton of mileage! I think we fed the neighborhood! You should hear some of the stories from parties at our house! Our motto was: Don't fall asleep before we do! Oh, the jokes we played on people! Ahh... great memories! Hilarious memories! We never had a lot of money, but we did have a lot of fun! Our kids have some awesome memories to take with them through life... that much is certain!

Keepit... I am not one to agree with KKNY but here goes... We all know that talking to teachers is parent responsibility blah blah blah...and it would be lovely if the parents were available whenever the teacher felt the need to relay a message ... I just say ok I'll tell dad here is mom's number you can call her. But the part I agree with KKNY about is ... what do you want to be called? what are your SD's friends calling other parents... are they saying Mrs. last name or Mrs. first name .. Ms first name... Most of my SC's friends parents go by their first name. But my BC I was Ms. lastname. and their dad was Mr. lastname... just depends what others are called ... my BC had friends whose parents were much older than I was so we used "proper names". When I was just the GF to my SC I used to tell children who asked I was a friend of SC who are you, I am SD's friend and you are? Kids are smart they can figure it out eventually the nosy kids will ask more. After awhile the kids would say she's my future SM, then evenutally SM there is not the stigma attached to being a SM as there used to be its accepted in society today ... yes you get the old bags who look down on you but too bad for them they will get over it. I do love the look of "shock" on people's faces when they ask ..Your husband has custody? YES! (still a big stigma attached to that) Ceph... I agree about the auntie thing I think it has a negative connotation when it comes to being GF... I don't care for it either. And with the signing of papers ... :) at the first parent teacher conference every year I go and talk with the teachers and tell them I will be a last resort for signing if dad forgets or whatever. I have a secret code worked out with the teachers that in place of my signature I put a green checkmark where it needs to be signed so they know an adult has signed it and seen the homework. So mom does not get pissy ... I will not sign "permission slips" its on them to get a parents signature not my responsibility. :)

I think a good compromise (and to make it less confusing) would be to come up with names such as "Nana" or "BonusGramps" (or whatever is decided) that are different enough from both "Grandma"/"Grandpa" and their full names so that it acknowledges that they are 'elders' with some 'extended' or 'blended' family ties without being uncomfortable for anybody. Even if it's a silly or unique nickname that the kids come up with. For example, I named all 4 of my *biological* grandparents when I was very young, and it stuck: "Mama Gin", "Papa Si", "Mom-Mom" and "Teet" (the last one was b/c this grandfather loved iced tea). Not knocking the old stand-bys "Grandma" and "Grandpa", but I really like the idea of personal unique nicknames for each. And it segues well into having unique names for SGP's. One good thing about your situation is that, unless the SGP's are real Buttinsky types, the kids having "bonus" grandparents is geenrally only going to be good. I say that based on maybe an idyllic conception of GP's as being involved in the GK's lives primarily as additional support and doting... Hopefully that'll be the case here.

fleurs: I'm so sorry about your issues. That fibromyalgia is a rough thing to cope w/. I often wonder if my mother has it - it can be so painful for her at times to just function and just a few short years ago, she was as physically young as she is mentally young! (She's very vivacious.) You wrote:................................................. I know there are a lot of women who would never have stayed in my situation with DH and his three children; I've had to be financially responsible for a long time in this relationship and today-they just seem to think all of this comes from their father, etc. etc. ............................................................ My sentiments, exactly w/ my situation. and you wrote:...................................................... I am just basically sick and tired of people not recognizing the efforts I've had to make in order for their lives to be good and i'm not only talking about DH and his children, but even my family, friends, work colleagues, etc. etc. ............................................................ Amen to that! My DH's kids have a huge sense of entitlement as I've stated. He wants to be the big shot to them all the time, too, which only makes it worse. I hope and pray we are on the right track, now. The marriage counselor has helped him see the light, etc. I just hope this isn't a honeymoon phase and he'll revert back to his old ways if the kids work on him or start complaining. I think the girls are better than their brother on most levels, but still, as someone here recentlyi said, there are givers and takers in the world and other than my parents, I'm surrounded by takers... My parents are nothing short of saints. They provided a loving, stable home for my brother and I and one of our cousins who needed them to step in and raise him. He is wonderful. My brother is selfish, bitter and takes advantage of my parents and me, though I've largely cut him off. I don't think he cares about anyone but himself. I have another cousin who recently inherited a large sum of money. He also just changed jobs, so he lost his dental ins. Here's the kicker: He never had dental ins. so I always saw him for free, of course. It wasn't major work, but enough to total near a couple of thousand $ had he been paying fee for service. When he got ins, did he come to me? No. Suddenly, it was too far to drive (less than 30 min. I would guess.) He had crowns and everything done at another office and since his ins. didn't pay 100% of the crowns, he paid a perfect stranger $600. I was stunned. Would he ever offer to even cover my materials, staff wages, or anything? No. I was very hurt and I know it's stupid, but since he now HAS money and we are broke (the fire), it's like he hasn't a care in the world and would never think to just insist on my receptionist taking a few bucks to cover costs. It makes me angry. I would never charge my family, in reality, and wouldn't have taken the $ had he offered, but it would be nice to be offered it, you know? My steps are always here doing teeth whitening procedures, taking the bleaching kits home by the armfuls, and offering it to their friends. I'm a little bitter as they've brought home friends from college and expected me and DH to work on them all weekend long, etc, for nothing or close to it...I wonder if I should go to their place of business and return the favors, lol. So, let's make a pact to be a little more selfish! My body is screaming at me to take it a little easier. Dana