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Anyone knows about this please help me

Posted by Afamilyofroses (My Page) on
Sat, Jun 11, 11 at 18:27

I am preparing to go through the adoption of my step children. Their father is consenting to the adoption however I am not sure if it will go as planned. I have a past conviction for a misdemeanor. I was in the middle of a divorce with my ex wife and she left me and moved to PA. I was then asked to reconcile which I promptly packed the house and when I went to put our dog in the car he bolted. I searched but ended up having to leave the state which left the dog as a runaway. We then divorced and I returned to AZ. I remarried soon after and was then arrested for a failure to appear. Well the dog returned to the former house a few days later after I was gone. They charged me with animal cruelty of abandonment however I never knew it until I was arrested a yr later. I agreed to the charges because the dog was my responsibility. My wife was pregnant (an at risk of loosing our baby) and I just wanted to move on with my life so I paid the fine. Now I am afraid that this might make me unacceptable to adopt my step children. They have been living with their mother (my wife) and I for over 2 yrs and I was excited for them to ask me to adopt them. I do not want to hurt their feelings if it cant be done. Do you think this will affect my chances at the step parent adoption? (This is the only thing on my record btw)


Follow-Up Postings:

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RE: Anyone knows about this please help me

Congrats on the adoption and kudos for being there for the kids! My DH was adopted by his step-father.

Do you have an attorney handling the adoption who you can ask?

I would think as long as you are open and honest about it from the beginning it shouldn't be a problem. It might only be a problem if the father was contesting this but he's not. I have a "soliciting" misdemeaner on my record. I know that can sound like prostitution so I always mention it on job applications and what not. I used to have a job doing sales door to door. We didn't have a permit to be in this one town so that's what they wrote me up for. LOL


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RE: Anyone knows about this please help me

No attorneys (The county attorneys office is stepping in to do the adoption for free) Maybe I should call them on Monday and ask then.


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RE: Anyone knows about this please help me

Have they told you already that they would even be doing a background check?

There are men in jail for far worse crimes and still have rights to their children when they get out. I think you'll be ok :)


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RE: Anyone knows about this please help me

"I have a "soliciting" misdemeaner on my record. I know that can sound like prostitution so I always mention it on job applications and what not. I used to have a job doing sales door to door. "

Oh NO, JensNatPat! That's funny (probably not so much for you, sorry about that.) I know a few people who have "indecent exposure" due to public urination - makes them sound like flashers.

AFamilyOfRoses, I don't think a misdemeanor would automatically disqualify you, especially considering that the kids already live with you. (Unless it were for something related to children, or maybe domestic abuse - but it's not.) Good luck!


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re: keep us updated

Thanks Mattie, it makes for a funny story to tell in interviews so it hasn't been so bad.

Roses, good luck and let us know how it goes. The kids are lucky to have you and will never have to question your love. :)


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RE: Anyone knows about this please help me

I don't know. Each state has different laws and requirements. I would think a misdemeanor is not of concern. A felony would concern me. A record involving children would also concern me. DUI/DWI might be of concern but I would think it would matter how long ago it was. Also, in most stepparent adoptions, the case worker possibly would ask about it and if you explain it as you did here, they could note it and decide it's not of concern.

Stepparent adoptions are different than any other adoption. You are married, live together and the biodad isn't an issue. I would contact a local attorney and 'inquire' about it. Maybe a free consultation to better understand or to better prepare for what will take place would be beneficial for you.

Good luck and congrats on becoming the 'legal' father. Very lucky kiddos!


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RE: Anyone knows about this please help me

Misdemeanors are fine. The only two things that will disqualify you are felony child abuse or felony drug abuse.

A step-parent adoption is a cakewalk, anyway---I don't think you even have to do a homestudy.

Good luck!


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oops

oops--I didn't mean felony drug "abuse." I meant drug convictions.

Not enough coffee this AM.


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RE: Anyone knows about this please help me

Lol love. Good Morning!!

I know here you have to do a homestudy but I've been told it's really not a big deal. They just want to see interaction between the two. Also told the entire process took less than 6 weeks to finalize. That's a cakewalk for sure


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RE: Anyone knows about this please help me

I really don't think that dog running away (not like you kicked him out) should be a manifestation of animal cruelty or should prevent you from adopting your stepkids, i hope not. Good luck! But if you are nervous, you might want to ask an attorney.


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RE: Anyone knows about this please help me

Just fyi.... you do have to do a homestudy in step parent adoptions. My husband adopted my son. It's not really too bad of a process. I wouldn't think this simple little misdemeanor would hurt you at all.


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