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jewel5903

My husband doesn't like my adult son.

jewel5903
17 years ago

I'm new to this message board - and remarriage - and hoped someone with some experience could give me some good advice. I have been married for a year and a half to a wonderful man. We get along SO well and are best friends. I had been divorced for about 14 years and his wife was killed in a car accident 6 years ago. We each have two children ranging in ages from 19 to 25. None of the children have lived with us. Here's the problem, though. The youngest of our children is my son, who is 19. He went to college this last year and ended up flunking out. He came to stay with us for the summer (he has lived with his father in a different state) and has been working. The problem is that my husband doesn't really like my son. I personally don't think he has good reason to dislike him, but he thinks his reasons are valid. My husband isn't rude or unkind to my son, but he seldom speaks to him. He has been silent and sullen since my son has been here. It is SO hard for me because I feel torn between the two. On the one hand, I love my son and am very defensive of him (probably too defensive.) I see my son's heart and know all the rejection, etc. that he's suffered in his life. I would want my husband to have some compassion. On the other hand, I know it's hard for my husband to have my son here and I appreciate that he's willing to let him. I just feel so hurt that he feels that way about my son. His kids have had many more advantages than mine have and, until their mother died, had two very loving and stable parents who spent time with them. My kids come from a divorced home and have a dad who basically doesn't give a rip. I want my husband to understand that and show some understanding and it hurts me deeply that he doesn't. I feel so disappointed in him and I find myself feeling very resentful. Anyway, if anyone out there has some insight into this problem, I'd appreciate all the help I can get. Other than this, we have a wonderful marriage and a great life. Thanks! Jewel

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