Introducing a Stepmom or Stepdad
athlete2010
13 years ago
Featured Answer
Comments (105)
silversword
13 years agokkny
13 years agoRelated Discussions
I guess I'm not a very good stepmom
Comments (8)"I have never felt it really was a blended family, more like two families living under the same roof." You're right, it's not a family. I think in order for a blended family to be successful there has to be one set of rules for everyone in the house. The two parents should come to an agreement on these rules and apply to them ALL kids the same. It sounds like in this situation what's good for the goose is not good for the gander. While you have no problem with your husband correcting your kids, he has a problem with you correcting his. When the two of you discussed getting married, did you discuss family rules and how discipline would be handled? If not, I doubt there's anything you can do to save your marriage and why would you? Sounds like your husband has reached his limit. He's already kicked you out because he said he's warned you for three years not to interfere with his kids but you continue to do so, your daughter is suffering as well, she stays in her room all evening when she gets home from school. And it seems you are stressed out seeing your husband's kids heading down the wrong path. Why subject yourself to more stress? I think you are better off without him and his family. Your husband seems fine with his kids behavior, so why would you subject yourself and your kids to more of the same?...See MoreMarried a great man, but terrible stepdad
Comments (41)"Their BF was no more than a caregiver for them while I finished my degrees. After that I felt that he could not do enough for us,so I divorced him and told him to move on. It took him a while to get over it, and he turned from a nice gullible man to a crazy nut. " You know i was going to defend you for your household but after reading more carefully i fully understand now why people are so pist off at you. I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS LINE I JUST READ. So you basically used this man, your ex, while you finished your degrees and then tossed him! WOW> You are a lowlife troll. I dont care if you pregnant. GOOD for you to marry a rich person. BUt HECK, for a moral perspective, your a leach. Hope your current husband made you sign a prenup to prevent you from dumping him and taking half his business. Yes, you provide for your kids. But they will hate you when they get older when they truly realize why you left their BF. ANd yes, they will have low self esteem while their stepfather caudles their new brother. So he didn't give any money to your kids. He still was a stayat home father while your got your degrees. You would be nothing right now, with no degrees if it weren't for him! If you didn't think your ex was worth anything then why did you have kids in the first place with him.? Why didn't you just use birth control , get on with your studies, and get married to a rich person in the first place????? oh and degrees mean nothing. I have a friend who dropped out in high school..he's a billionaire! and he still hates school...lol... You said it, your ex turned from a gullable man to a crazy nut. YOU USED A GULLABLE PERSON TO MEET YOUR ENDS , TOSSED HIM AND MADE HIM CRAZY. Who's the bad person here???? Take a good look at yourself! you know what? dont cry wolf. you made your bed, now ly in it! Don't complain that your new husband is a terrible stepparent. He is not terrible. You are a terrible person for dumping your ex the way you did and now you are complaining your rich husband doesn't look at your other kids the same way? WHY SHOULD HE?...See MoreStepdaughters' lies and blaming stepmom
Comments (22)Hi all, I'm new. I just want to say that many of the issues you mention really aren't YOUR issues. Things like her fraudulant lawsuits for example. I have an ex who's always frauding someone...but it's not my problem. The system will catch up and when it does, they'll have to pay somehow. You need to focus on dealing with the children when they're in your care, and disregard what they do in her care, unless they're in danger. You seem to have stopped the spanking but maybe you should make their Dad handle all the discipline. You could even try a "wait until your father gets home" stance when they are in your care and your husband is away. Once you stop engaging with them, they will stop engaging with you. You've only been married two years, so you have a long road ahead. Your nit-picky issues are just that, little nit-picky issues. I'd blow them off and laugh it off as a jealous bio-mom...those do exists sometimes. You know YOU and those around you know YOU...don't waste your time focusing on what she says or does. Keep documenting everything and always anticipate the worst, but hope for the best. If the relationship with the girls is broken, I'd really try mending it. If you're interested in some ways, let me know, maybe we can get creative. If you plan to stay married, you really need to get along with his kids, they don't go away after they turn 18, only the CS....See MoreWhat do my kids call their stepdad?
Comments (41)This is ego driven and entitlement based. I have a little girl from my wife's previous marriage. She used to call me Mike but through love, caring, and being present she sometimes calls me Daddy. I am not entitled to this name but it was earned for me. I also have a son who I fathered and I am very much his Daddy as well. We went through this same issue when the lil' girl started calling my mom/ Mamaw...because her bio grandma was also called Mamaw. My mother has 6 grandchildren and you expect the lil' girl to call her Memaw instead of following suite with the other children is ego based. If a parent can love more than one child why can't a child love more than two parents. I am raising the child. I don't say "she's like or as my own" she has a good relationship with her father...we can both be dad. My biggest issue is when a parent is too shortsighted and starts coaching their child to say anything other than what is in that child's heart....if I earned the title daddy then so be it. You don't need to sit there and coach your child telling them all the things that I am not...just be happy that I love this baby too, that I'd never hit her or hurt her, that she is the apple of my eye and that my family openly embraced her and her mother without any stigma attached. Check you ego, bio parents. When you decide to divorce you need to understand that that means that things change. You are only going to get to enjoy 1/2 of the kids childhood if you are lucky. Instead of 18 years with them you will get a total of 9 years worth of days raising your baby. Get over titles, ranks, and labels and get along for the sake of the children and if that means letting them love and assign as they see fit then so be it....See Moremattie_gt
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