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iw2bip

Well, now what?

iw2bip
14 years ago

When I married my husband his son was 4 years old. He had full custody of his son. The BM left because she couldn't handle raising the son that she swore she would never say "no" to - he could have and do anything he wanted - and he turned into a real brat (go figure).

The stepson is now 20 years old. Our years together were a lot like the other stories here...There was rarely a 'happy' day with him. He was horribly demanding, inconsiderate, selfish and spoiled. Hubby never disciplined him, the maternal grandparents spoiled him out of guilt (his grandmother admits this), and every time I tried to correct him I all he had to do was whine and he'd get out of it.

But, somehow, and I'm not even sure how, we made it through the years. But there is a great emotional distance between my stepson and I. Living with his constant spoiled actions for so many years left me drained.

Now he's in college, and still as spoiled as ever. He acts like he's 12 years old, whining and throwing tantrums if he doesn't get his way. He bullies the younger children in the family and makes a scene if he's told to stop.

Last Christmas (which is usually at our house), he started trouble with the younger kids, was told to settle down, and he threw a tantrum, yelling obsenities and announcing "that's it, I leaving". But,unfortunately, he didn't leave.

I had seen enough. After his tantrum stopped, I told his father to make him apoligize to our guests. Our friends and family did not need to endure this. He did apologize, but the day was not the same after that.

My concern now is, what do I do this year? I want to have a happy home and happy holiday. I want, for my hubby's sake, to have all the family together, but this boy is going to act up, I know he will. I've tried in past years to talk to my stepson before the events and explain that we don't want any fussing, but it doesn't work. He's like Jekyl and Hyde. He's fine and seems to understand before the guests arrive, but the minute they show up, it's all different. He's loud, obnoxious, bullying and whining.

I know the holidays are months away, but I'm already worried about it. I don't want to go through last year all over again this year...any suggestions???? Please!!!

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