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I need your opinion

Posted by cat38 (My Page) on
Fri, Mar 27, 09 at 10:46

DH and BM took ss to 2 specialists last Tuesday both doctors said yes ss has asthma and put him on some new meds... BM has not dropped of ss inhaler (hes 6) DH said he would get it but she said she would handle it... OK so when???

BM lives with her parents although she makes 70,000.00 a year, her dad smokes in the house he has said its his house and he will smoke if he wants to...

MY QUESTION- how long should dh give bm to find a place of her own before he says anything else about ss health?

DH and I are fighting over this issue, because it mkes me sick knowing she doesnt care enough about her son to do something about her living arrangements.... I want to call DCF and report her for neglect? any ideas...


Follow-Up Postings:

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RE: I need your opinion

Get a second inhaler and keep it at your house. Okay, now for the harder part... try and find out if what a court orders/allows in terms of living situation is altered by the child having a disease which is being directly put in jeopardy in his current circumstances (i.e. asthma and smoking). I'm betting it does change things! The courts can't order Grumps to stop smoking (let alone enforce it), but they may be able to order BM to move out of there or for the kid to come live with you in a non-smoking household. Best of luck.


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RE: I need your opinion

Maybe the doctor can talk to her about her living in a smoke filled house. It won't go over well coming from her exhusband.

A judge probably will be interested; but it will be expensive involving expert testimony and interrogating the grandparents on the stand who will swear they smoke outside or only in parts of the house the child never visits.

My son had asthma and had twice to go by ambulance to the ER. Has that happened? There can also be a dispute on 'how' severe his asthma is.

Something that seems like an open and shut case discussing it in your kitchen, can turn out to be really iffy in a courtroom. And expensive. Judges are so reluctant to change custody.


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RE: I need your opinion

They have 50/50 custody and in their custody agreement it states that each parent will make sure that the son lives in a happy and healthy home...

The doctor told bm that their should not be any smoking around the child at all if they want him to get better.. Shes a nurse she already knows this. She had originally told dh that he brainwashed the doctors, but after seeing the chest x-ray herself she believes the doctor...

i guess im just sick of seeing my ss suffer the wrath of bm and her selfishness.... Dh and I are fighting because of it... They are making me crazy


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