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Alone time

Posted by sassysouthernmom (My Page) on
Mon, Jan 27, 14 at 16:15

I would like to know where everyone else stands. My husband and I have a blended family. I have two sons. Their dad and I split 7/7. My DH has a son that we have ALL the time. He is 11. He has a second son that we get every other weekend (on weekends that coincide with when my boys are there). My issue is with the 11 year old that is there all the time. Because my DH has pretty much had him since he was 2, he has raised him like an adult. He has always been allowed to do whatever his dad did. If his dad cooks, he sits on the kitchen counter, if his dad mows, he stands in the yard. His dad is ALWAYS entertaining him. If we sit on the couch and watch TV this steps-son plays on his ipad and constantly says, "hey dad watch this" and shows him pictures/videos.

My boys have been raised to be children. They 'Go Play' and never have to be right up under my feet. It drives me crazy that we have no alone time. I just wish he would go play so that we could grab a nap on a sunday afternoon or watch a movie that might not be appropriate for kids.

My DH says he feels guilty if we retreat to the bed room because his son might get bored...yet when my boys are there, they just all play. It has left me feeling like my boys are the babysitter. My DH has no problem telling his other son no.

We have talked openly about it, but the change just doesnt seem to stick. Am I being unreasonable?

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: Alone time

How old are your boys? Why can't they all play together? I know exactly how you feel as my SS was an only child when we first got married and he had to be entertained by DH all the time! He would constantly butt into adult conversations or interrupt and turn every conversation about him. He was only 8 at the time so we couldn't exactly leave him to play on his own but it was frustrating to say the least. He's 16 now and still relies on DH to keep him entertained when he's here but he's mostly in his room now as he's addicted to video games like every other teenage boy. Whatever happened to playing outside or hanging out with friends? Kids are so anti-social these days...I was never home when I was his age!

If the three boys are close in age, it's not unreasonable at all to expect the 11 year old to play with them so that you and DH can have some alone time.

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