OH ,Slow, that is good news. I hope she can stick with it and move on to a wonderful life!

Praying for you and your DD

Maria

OH, THANK YOU CURB: That is such good news that someone I know knows a graduate. The guy I've been talking to in admissions said he's seen some real miracles happen there, including himself - he now works for CENIKOR. I'm going to tell her when I'm ready to leave her that I WILL NOT pick her up if she doesn't graduate the program, and w/NEVER help her again. I have no doubt she can do it. She's taken on quite a lot of challenges during nursing school, and she DOES have inner strength, if she can work the program long enough to re-capture it. There success rate sounds even better than that of AA's, which is only 30%, I believe. Thanks for that testimonial. It's very encouraging.

Slow, so sorry to hear this. Life sure can present us with challenges. I will pray specifically for your daughter and her caretakers along with peace for you.
HUGS, PRAYERS, and BLESSINGS for you and your family.

I just stopped in today to this forum, after not being here for so long (your projects make me jealous that I have not been able to participate, although I've bought a few plates and have some ideas..).
Slow, I'm sorry about your daughter. I work with people who suffer from mental illness/addictions and or one or both. They are precious in His sight, no matter what they bring to the table. However, it is no fun living this life dealing with these things for you or your daughter. You are a really, really great Mom - and your daughter really trusts you or she wouldn't have called you back to let you know why she ran away. Even through all of this, it sounds like you have cultivated a great relationship.
You are doing the most awesome thing, to help your daughter and to also set down tough love boundaries.

My prayers to you both,

girlgroupgirl

Slow, I'll be keeping your daughter & yourself in my heart, and sending good thoughts that she'll make it home tomorrow & do well in the program.

Slow, I read the whole web site and found it VERY incouraging as to what they stand for and their recovery based model. I agreed with everything I read! I have always firmly believed that it's more than putting the plug in the jug, and treatment is sooo valuable! I have seen many miracles in the 18yrs of recovery in the rooms of AA and NA, and have one Dear Friend who went to 19 detoxes, and 15 treatment centers!!! And now has been clean and sober for 14yrs straight!!! He just never gave up!!! I am laughing just thinking about him cuz when I worked at the local detox, we called him Flying Phil cuz he was always flying on something! AND he would come to NA and AA mtgs, drunk/high, and have a coffee and wait for 1/2 time so he could grab the butts from smoke break and leave! He dissappeared for 9mos and showed up one day and said he had been in a treatment center called Miracle Valley. Today he is hard core recovery like me!!! AMEN!!! I am so proud of you for your comment about when you drop her off, she needs to have a good reason to stay there when she wants to run from the painful realities of her life, and she'll wanna run, trust me! So to say that will stick in her head and she will stick it out!! You need to take care of yourself thru this!!! Detaching is so important for her AND you! Get to a meeting and talk about it! The people in the rooms will encourage you!!! I LOVE you dearly! Jane

Slow, I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.It must be the toughest decision of you life to tell her you won't help her anymore unless she goes through the program. We as mothers know sometimes the hardest way is what's best.

Maria

I just can't believe how wonderful y'all are. Who w/have thought a bunch of women who don't even know us could be so caring and supportive. CALAM, I used to go to AA mtgs. w/her. I read the Big Book, the 12 steps, took her to so many detox centers, paid for several rehab treatments, but don't remember her ever being this near the street. I went to a couple of Al-Anon mtgs., but those aren't for me. I was totally put off by those mtgs. I understand enough about the disease that those people couldn't help me AT ALL. All I can do at this point is take her to this one last treatment center, and if she chooses not to graduate, I'll TRY to let her go. Thanks again, y'all, for letting me vent.

Oh Slow,
I will be thinking and praying for you and DD today. I am almost there with my DS. It is so so hard to be strong and not "help" them in ways that just don't help. He's only been through 2 programs, but he is just 21. I believe he went to a shelter last night which can (if he allows it) help him make connections which can offer real help; not just the 5 minute kind. I so hope the best for you and your DD. She sounds like she may have her Mom's strength deep down somewhere. Jeanne

Slow
I've never been to this section of the site, but wanted to let you know I've got you, and your daughter in my prayers.

Having an alcoholic admit, and try to get better is such a blessing. Especially when they are family.
Be well.
Helen

Slow, I am sorry for your pain...I am the child of an alcholic and know the pain and distruction it can cause. I worked for an organization in Florida that treated drug and alchol addicts... it is a long road but she knows the love you have for her and how strong your faith in God is... it will pull her through. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Slow, I'll be praying hard that your DD will arrive today and take that big step.

What a great program.

Hugs and prayers to both of you,
SadieSadie

Gosh - I've missed this conversation somehow.

Best of luck to you and your daughter, Slow. My brother-in-law is sitting in jail awaiting sentencing right now for his 6th DWI. It's tearing his family apart but he won't get help.

Much love to you, Slow ... and strength, and whatever else I can offer that you might need.

DH is a recovering alcoholic who made my life pure h3ll for several years before going through treatment. We'd been separated for 18 months and I'd finally made an appt. with a lawyer for divorce. Watching his downward spiral and being helpless to bring him back to the man I knew he was, broke my heart on a daily basis. When you're caught up in the emotions of it all, it's terribly hard to make decisions that aren't based on those emotions.

In the long run, he's been sober 17 years now, with no relapses. I think the best advice we were given while he was there, is ... change your playground, change your playmates. An addict cannot continue to frequent the same old haunts, and hang out with the same old buddies, and expect to stay sober/straight.

Bless you for the troubles you've been through, and those that may still be coming. Standing by someone and being so helpless is harder than hard. I've not heard of this Cenikor, but a 90% success rate is about as encouraging as you can get!

((Slowmedown))

I just realized that this conversation site was here. Slow I am so sorry about your DD, but it sounds like she is on her way to letting you help her. Our kids will always be our kids, no matter how old they are and its soo hard to see them suffer. I hope everything will turn out fine.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Take care,
Bianchi

Slow,
You and you daughter are in my thoughts and prayers. Please know there are people out here who know what you are going through. I have a 34 year old daughter who is an alcoholic and drug addict. I have not heard from her for months. I know she is still alive because my other daughter keeps in contact with people who know where she is. I also have a son who is an alcoholic. It is a terrible disease that destroys families and relationships. I have grandchildren that have never been part of my life because of this terrible demon. I also have grandchildren that were never allowed to be born. Sadly, they are the ones who suffered less than the ones that have had to see and experience their mothers behavior. They are the ones who still suffer. It affects generations, not just individuals. God's Peace.
Ramona

Well Slow you know my story .I am so happy for you that she has changed her mind.I missed a couple of day's talking to you but have caught up here.Funny how we think others lives are so perfect when our own are so messed up.It's not always the case is it?A lot of us share the same pain.As you know my son who is 43 is a drug addict,lost his wife,his beautiful children (even tho they remain very close) and still can't get it together.He has a wonderful caring heart ,very talented artist ,so many things going for him but nothing has power like the drugs.My heart is breaking like your's so I understand.I would give my life to heal this addiction but instead I fear his life will end before mine.So my dear Slow I pray for you and DD .I ask that you all pray for my son too.thank you annie

OH Annie, I'm so sorry. big hugs to you too sweetie

Gosh, it's so easy to get caught up in mosaics and forget there are lives behind all that talent.

Bless you all daily on the paths you travel and the obstacles you face.

OHMYGOODNESS. WHAT A BUNCH OF WONDERFUL PEOPLE!! We're all packed and ready for an early departure tomorrow morn. for Cenikor. Hallelujah!

Please have a safe trip!! We'll be thinking about you!

Slow and DD: Although not with you in person, I'm willing to bet that dozens of folks from here will be with you in thought and prayer on the trip tomorrow and for the trip thru the days to come. Know that you both are loved simply for who you are and prayers are sent for you several times a day.

Pat

Wow, Slow, I have tears in my eyes just reading this thread. I'm sorry I haven't been over here sooner, but at least I haven't missed the opportunity to pray for you and daughter before your trip tomorrow. God GO WITH you, and I KNOW He will! You couldn't escape that even if NONE of us prayed for you, and you know that many of us will. He said "I will NEVER leave you nor forsake you," and didn't qualify it with anything. He's there, and we are too in our small way. We love you, dear Slow!

Slow I too am very sorry for what you are going through I too had a father who died at a young age of Alco. It is so hard on the family I feel so like the other .I pray God will hold you and DD in his hands as you go through this ordeal .I pray for your strength .Yes it is so hard to see our love ones to go through this .My love and prayers are with you .Tricia

I'm relieved to hear she has returned safely. Be strong tomorrow

I had to check in here for blessings. God is DEFINITELY in this drastic move on her part. I don't know how to thank y'all for your many prayers and thoughts, but suffice it to say, they are WORKING. I feel God's presence, just reading these messages. God bless each one of you in His very own special way. W/be leaving in three hrs, for what I think w/be a ride to survival. I love y'all.

I'm praying the drive goes smoothly. I can only imagine the emotions. My mother's father was an alcoholic (died when she was 8)though I have been fortunate to not have first hand experience. As a mother though my heart breaks for you.

It seems that mosaics have turned into therapy for so many after reading all the posts and seeing all those dealing with addictions in their family.

I'm with you Slow All the way!!!!!!This is the right thing to do.Love you Annie

Mosaic Therapy: Taking the broken pieces and putting them back together to make something beautiful.

Ramona

Big hugs to you to Ramona! my heartaches for all you moms

Slow, I am so glad that she is going to try this new program, I so hope it will give her the strength to conquer her battle with this. You and your daughter are in my thoughts,
Cindy

Slow, I am so out of the loop..I did not realize what had been going on. I am so choked up just reading all these posts!!! YOU PEOPLE ARE SO PRECIOUS!!!!!

I also will be praying for you....I wont add my past troubles to this list but I do feel for you (and all of you who have had to go through this!!!!)

I will be checking in on this side to keep up on this...God bless you and your daughter.

TO EVERYONE ELSE: you are all so freakin awesome....I am near tears trying to type this. I love all of you for you compassion and caring that you have been heaping on Slow and others!!!

Slow, I know you'll post when you can-just wanted to know how you are feeling?? IF you felt things went well? Big hugs lady!!

Ramona,maybe thats why so many of us love this art so much.thanks for putting it that way.

Oh, MY! Home again yesterday afternoon, after a VERY long, hard trip. I w/be forever grateful for all your prayers, expressions and thoughts that held us up through this episode. Cenikor w/change her life, as it has done for so many people. I was spellbound by the words from the one who screened and finally approved her admittance. It was like a waterfall of a soothing, cleansing balm washing over us both. I think her fears were put to rest about the program. I KNOW she w/graduate w/o a doubt. When the interviewer showed us a stack of papers he's working on of those wanting to get into the program - majority are prison inmates - I looked at him puzzled and asked "then how did my daughter get in so quickly?". He smiled, and then I said "Oh, I know", and pointed upwards. I truly believe this was an act of God. He has saved her yet again, and I believe this time it w/be for good. I have so much faith and confidence in this program, that I am at peace for the first time in 20 yrs. If any of you have family members/friends who need behavior change, this is the place. Check into it. Thanks again, y'all. You are a wonderful family. It's a very safe environment, and they are like family there. Everyone working there are recovering from chemical abuse, so they understand the problems of those entering. Their lives have changed drastically, and now they are working to change the lives of each new resident. It's a place where miracles happen.

Whoo hoo!! Glad it went well! Glad you're back safe and confident about DD's recovery. So happy for you! Gigantic hugs and positive vibes comin' your way!!

What wonderful, wonderful news, SMD. I understand the weight that's been eased from your shoulders, and the huge sense of relief you're feeling. If I were you, I'd probably sleep for 24 hours straight and wake up feeling like a brand-new woman! Much love to you ...

Oh Slow, that's geat, great news!
Yes, rest up and take care of yourself now.

It sounds like the right place for your DD.
Glad you're home safely.
Take care of yourself now, God is with you and your daughter.
Bianchi

Oh, that is such good news! I've been looking for an update, and I thought "in this case no news is good news". I figured if it went badly you would have been right back. My ex- the father of my boys was a druggie, alcoholic etc. He cleaned up ( after I left him) but even through some nightmares (Jason's death and a few months later finding his daughter ( then 9 - by his present wife) was molested by a neighbor), he has stayed clean.

I asked my son in heaven, who seems to intercede with the BIG GUY often for me and his friends to send some help to your daughter.

It's amazing all the people this disease has touched here.

Ramona, I'm printing your words out to put in my work area.If I was good, I'd do a mosiac plaque...

Maria

Thanks again, y'all. No rest in sight until perhaps Monday. Packed up stuff all day, separating things to give away and the most precious things to keep. I can't take it all, nor does she deserve everything to be saved, so I have two more days, perhaps three, to work VERY hard to get things cleaned out and the apt. cleaned. Thank y'all so very much.

Slow, so glad to hear you are back safe and your DD went in willingly. You and your DD will continue to be in my prayers. I hope you get some rest and peace.

Ramona, great quote! I've printed it out to put in my glass shop.

((((((((((Slow)))))))))) Again sorry I forgot about this side of the board. So glad to hear things are turning around for you. Thank You Lord!!! It is wonderful you are able to save some of her most precious things for her and able to work so hard to do so. She will appreciate it so much at a later time. You are a GOOD MOM. Not that there was doubt. I had two Moms and both together could not hold a candle to you. I have missed the worst of it for you but will still send my Prayers up for you and your daughter.

Chris

It takes hitting rock bottom to get help sometimes...I know that your daughter is going to come out of this program with the kind spirit and loving person she is. She's in God's hands and all is good.....she's safe and getting the best treatment, surrounded by professional angels that are going to bring her around. You are the best Mother...I know how hopeless and helpless you have felt at times...but now it's going to be all GOOD! God bless you and your entire family...........

NOW GO BREAK SOMETHING...............

Slow...just read this thread. I've not visited the conversations in a long time. My heart melted for you and your daughter as I read this. I'm so thankful that it's worked out well for you.. and will send continuing prayers and positive thoughts your way that it continues.
Katie

Slow, I hope you're getting good news about your daughter and her treatment. My thoughts are with you.
Take care of yourself now.
Bianchi

Seldom check this side. Thank y'all again. She's not allowed to even send out a letter until she's been there two weeks, and today marks that day - can send out two and receive three. Thirty/45 days of orientation in which she has no privileges - after that visitations of family w/a buddy. After three months, she has telephone privileges w/a buddy - nine months w/o buddy and uncensored mail, four hrs. outing w/family every month. At 12 months - a Year Pin Ceremony. After 15 months eligible for 8-hr. outings w/family w/o a buddy and can go to outside support groups (AA) w/a buddy and walking privileges around the compound w/o a buddy. VERY strict. I live in fear that she'll want out, but hope w/all my heart she'll stay for the two years. After the three months, she w/be appointed a job on the outside, where they'll transport the residents to jobs offered by businesses that support the foundation. Their salaries are given to the foundation to pay for their program. After 18 months, she w/be expected to find her own job, have her own place, a car and two months living expenses. She gets to keep all she earns this last six months. This is to prepare them for re-entry into society. They have a 90% success rate, which is much, MUCH higher than that of AA. My hope is that she'll do as some of the staff members have done, and get a job with the foundation and live and work at one of the campuses. She's never been able to live alone successfully. Thank y'all again for your prayers. They are still working.

Thanks for the update, Slow. Sounds like a solid program that understands addiction to the core. You, your DD, and her caregivers continue to be in my prayers.