I've posted this book before. "Clap Your Hands' by Lorinda Bryan Cauley. My kids still love it. Every page has a couple of easy actions to do. If he gets a Dr. Suess book, read it first before you leave the store. The older ones had more rhythm and easier to pronounce words. Some of the newer ones like the ABC book are difficult to read and aren't funny or interesting either. Things usable or consumable are always appreciated. Clothes or bubbles are good choices. Videos or dvds with singing and dancing are starting to be interesting to that age group. My kids loved the Wiggles, but I don't think the group is as popular as they were a few years ago. Here is a link that might be useful: Clap Your Hands

Dear steph4491, Your feelings of not really liking to be around when all the kids are there. I am sure you are a good mom to all these children and what is happening now is you feel like nobody appreciates what you have done and what you are doing for these kids - espcially his kids. It is a fact that there are alot of kids around your home and it is a fact that even though they are not ''blood related'' there will be jealousy, friction and so one between them. Thats what kids do biological or not. The problem however is when others start telling you how to raise those kids, what should be better for them, etc. etc. etc .when in fact you are the one who is holding the fort here for all these kids, including your boyfriend. I have been a stepparent for 18 years and I too heard comments from by hubby's family as to how I was raising his kids. What business is it of his family whether or not his kids have their own room when they come over every second weekend. Thank the lord they even have a room to sleep in when they come over. I totally agree whit you when you say its not like they don't have their own room at their mom's and that's the way it should be because that is where they live. When they go to your house, they are visiting!!! It reminds a few years ago when hubby and I moved into a three bedroom house. I figured one for us, one for the kids and one will serve as an office room. I needed the office room to study and to do some freelancing. Well, you can just imagine how the kids reacted when they saw there was only one room for them and they would have to take turns using it. One weekend it would be my stepson and the other weekend it would be my stepdaughter. The oldest stepdaughter hardly ever stayed over for the night. And that was alright with me cuz God know's where we would have put her. I really didn't care what anybody said. For years, I put those kids first in our life but this time I had decided that I was going to put my needs first. And guess what, nobody died from the situation. In fact, my stepson started enjoying having to sleep downstairs in the family living room when his sister got the '' one bedroom" which had no TV''. My stepson started enjoying the basement so much since he could watch movies and eat chips as long as he wanted, that he soon told his sister she could have the ''one bedroom'' every time they came over to our house every other weekend. According to the grand-parents, your boyfriend's kids should have their own room when them come over to your place! Well, first of all, they say that so that these kids will feel they are treated the same way as your kids are! But what about Christmas, did they treat your kids the same way they treated your boyfriends's kids. No! So, there you go. When they make comments like the kids should have their own bedroom's, just remember where these comments come from! Why don't you suggest they buy you a house with lots of bedrooms so then everybody will be happy! Try suggesting that to them! It will probably put them in their place for awhile and isn't that what we want! As far as the kids mother saying lies about you....ignore her, ignore her comments, her lies, everything about her unless you truly have to discuss the kids! Otherwise stay away from her. Don't talk about her. Don't react to her lies or what someone tells you she said about you. You have enough stress in your life! Be good to yourself. Finally, please don't feel guilty about finding excuses to leave the house when its the kids weekend at your house! It's perfectly normal when one feels like there generosity is being abused. Believe me nobody is going to die while you are gone during those weekends! It's not like your boyfriend can't take care of the kids while you take a little bit of time for yourself and find the strenght to go back to the house and deal with all these people! Sometimes, I used to count the hours to sunday night when the kids would be leaving. It's not that I didn't love them, but holy macaroni, you truly have to live the situation you are living as a stepparennt to know what I mean when I say i wasn't sorry to see them leave after spending the weekend with us! Funny thing though! About an hour after they had left, their father and I would always look at each other and say ...''Isn't it strange without them around"! We miss them already the little buggers! Talk to your boyfriend about your feelings and tell him how you feel and tell him again and again and again and during all this time, remember to be good to yourself and to take time for yourself when his kids are there! Keep posting.

Giving a gift is something you do because you WANT to, and I think it says a lot that your DD feels comfortable asking you to take her shopping to get her stepsister and dad a gift. I also understand why you reminded her to get SM something, it teaches her to think of others feelings, etc. though I'm not sure I would push much if she said she didn't want to get certain people gifts if she had an acceptable reason. As for your family, when they family say something like that, I'd tell them that I understand what they mean but if you stoop to dad's level and refuse to take your DD shopping, the only person that will be hurt by it is your DD. Besides, you are teaching her to be a better person. I wouldn't worry so much about showing her whether you are accepting of the situation, etc. You are showing her that you care about HER feelings, despite your own. I used to take my exBF's kids shopping for their mother on her birthday, mother's day & Christmas. I would also save the things they made in school for "mom" and put them in a box so when she rolled into town once a year, she had all the stuff they made her over the year, along with school pictures & presents. I didn't like nor dislike her. She wasn't around to know much about her except she chose drugs & her boyfriend over sticking around to raise her kids, but the kids wanted to give mom that stuff & it meant something to them so that is what I did for them. Now with SD, it's a totally different scenario. In the early years, I took her shopping for her mom. I also got BF's kids and SD's sister things too for Christmas. I made BM a scrapbook with pictures from all of SD's Christmases. It was my attempt to be friendly with BM. As things progressively got worse with BM & SD over the years, I stopped shopping for BM but still bought BF's kids things. I stopped shopping for SD's sister after she wrote nasty things about me on a social network. and this year, I have decided to give SD one gift for me & let DH do the rest of the shopping for SD. AS for taking SD shopping for her mom or anyone else, DH has always said no but didn't care if I did it. Of course, I agree that if the child earns money, they can spend it how they choose. I offered SD a job over the summer & she said she wanted to but never did it. Since now she isn't talking to me, she can't exactly discuss payment for chores with me and DH is not interested in paying her to do anything... he can't even get her to do her basic chores. Amber is right, you are teaching her something so valuable and hopefully your family will come to see it. On the other hand, if your DD asks dad to take her shopping for you but he refuses, then he will have to deal with the consequences... and your daughter will know who is cooperative and who is not.

Sounds like they're quite different (my DS' girlfriend is a nursing student, very simple style, no makeup, hardly any jewelry) but last year I bought her a very dainty and simple beaded bracelet from Etsy that she seemed to like a lot. The year before, a Kate Spade makeup bag (she uses it for travel toiletries). This year, two books (she's a big reader) and a Spa Finder gift card (can be used for spas, salons, even exercise classes). You might find a cool makeup bag on Etsy, then put a Sephora card in it. Or a gift card to an art supply store, tucked inside a nice sketch book?