skip to main content

The Single Life

Love is a FOUR-letter word - what is it - how do you 'find' it?

20 years ago

I thought this would be a controversial topic - everyone has a personal definition - yet it can't be put into words. What does it mean to YOU? For me "love" means:

L= listen to your mate

O= open up-verbalize your thoughts

V= validate your mate

E= enjoy your mate

To define it, for me, is impossible - believe me, I thought I knew what love was with each and every relationship. I have begun a strong friendship with a wonderful man and find the dynamics to be entirely different!

I would say that if it gives you warm and fuzzy feelings when everything is going well and feels like a knife thru your heart when things are going bad, it is probably love. If it is selfish, exploitive and manipulative it's lust.

If it soft and warm, makes you feel secure and complete, it is probably love. Love "just happens" - lust is a planned event. If your mate leaves you hungry and thirsty for more time with him/her, it's probably love. If your mate only thinks of you at 'certain' times and not all the time, it's probably lust.

All I can I say is, if you think it's love, hold on tight and be prepared for a WILD ride!

I would like to hear other's responses on this elusive subject, so I hope you won't be shy - you are among friends - let's hear what YOU think.

Sort by:Oldest

Comments (5)

Tinmantu
20 years ago
By being patient and not working to hard to insure that you find it, it will come into your life when you least expect it....by knocking your self out in search of it, you will sometimes meet so many dissapointments that you tend to give up.....by having contentment with yourself and realizing that as long as you are patient, the right person WILL come along eventually.
I agree with all your signs of love that you listed above...Right now I am at the stage where she is on my mind constantly, to the point of distracting my daily tasks and has me watching the clock so that I can get home and spend my time with her.....is it love?....it's growing....is it lust? no, there is too much other in common for me to consider that.
Carrie B
20 years ago
Just thought I'd put a link to Bob Dylan's "Love is Just..." lyrics below.

Enjoy!

Here is a link that might be useful: Love is Just a Four Letter Word, lyrics
Related Discussions
Putting letters together to make words
Q
Comments (1)
What you are needing is editing software to do what you want to do. I have Edit & Stitch by Amazing Designs, which works great for me. I am sure there are many others that work well, but this is the only software that I am familiar with. You bring each letter into your design in the software and position where you want it, save the design on your computer and then you can take the whole designed name into your Ultimate Box and then on to your machine. I do believe there is a trial version of this software that you can try out for a month. It can be found at www.amazingdesigns.com. When you get to the page, click on embroidery software on the left hand side. I think Edit & Stitch 2.0 is the newest version. If you basically want to do only personalization, then maybe Personalize & Stitch would be a better option. However, if you want to do different things with designs (the website will explain the differences) then I think maybe Edit & Stitch would be the one. Good Luck!
...See More
The first 3 words you find describe you.
Q
Comments (34)
My 3 words are the same as Moni's but in this order: lovely funny beautiful LOL, I haven't found fat and whore. Need to look harder or maybe I'm just too tired...
...See More
Ruin Thanksgiving in four words
Q
Comments (137)
"Running two hours late" "No, we just ate" ...said in that order by in-laws... I've sure enjoyed reading these - thanks for all the laughs!
...See More
What do you say? How do you find words?
Q
Comments (38)
This is the fifth time in my social/family circle that I have heard of someone being killed by a close family member. It is more common than people think. In all of the cases I am referencing, the woman and in some cases children, were killed by the father/husband/boyfriend. Getting over it will be a long process. I would advise taking a tip from the "When Bad Things Happen to Good People" school of thought. One will never be able to figure out the "why" or get over the shock and horror and grief. But one must move forward. Important to move forward in honor of those we have lost. This is what they would want for us and from us. Just be there for them consistently, let them talk about it without trying to make it less or make it go away, but also encourage positive actions in honor of those who are lost. Perhaps some type of memorial. In several of the cases I know where someone was killed, the community has established scholarship and violence prevention programs in their honor. Perhaps there is one already going on in your community to which you could donate in honor of the family.
...See More
kayjones
Original Author
20 years ago
Thanks for the link to the song lyrics Carrie - had no idea there was such a song! I am glad Bob agrees that love is just a 'four letter word'. LOL
Tinmantu
20 years ago
That's a good one Carrie....as I recall, at that period in his life Dylan was indeed searching for answers...he had been through the drug addiction and had lost a lot and found God...he doesn't have the best voice in the world...(hell probably doesn't have the best voice in the singles forum is a safe bet)....but he is a poet in his own manor and my daughter shakes her head when she comes in and hears me playing his CD's.."What do you see in him, Dad??"...heh
puddlejumper
20 years ago
Umm, no, not really. You see, LUST is a 4-letter word. Limerance is what you feel when you first fall in love. But it's not love. Love is a decision. It's a choice that is also an emotion. Love is what happens when you get through the first 2 years or so of strong emotions and if you're lucky, real lucky, you choose to love each other.

Love is what you choose to feel, if respect and trust are the foundations of your relationship, and if you truly enjoy each other's company. Love is what you feel when you realize the other person has a few warts but also has lots of good qualtities, and you know your life is so much better with that person in it.

The way I look at it - I'm working to get independent and to enjoy my new life as a single person. When I've accomplished a few important goals I'll start dating. There is someone or even a few someones out there for me. And, when I'm ready, I'll meet up with them.

Related Stories

MY HOUZZ Houzz TV: Love Letter to a Small Midcentury Find

By Margot Hartford Photography

A 630-square-foot 1956 home captures its owner’s heart. See it when it was new and now

CONTRACTOR TIPS The 4 Potentially Most Expensive Words in Remodeling

By Hannah Kasper

‘While you’re at it’ often results in change orders that quickly add up

DECORATING GUIDES Spell It Out: Words of Inspiration for Your House

By Jess McBride

A favorite quote can enhance a room the way an inspiring idea engages your mind. Here’s how to add word power to your interiors

Literally Literal: Using Letters & Language to Decorate

Home decor letters design ideas

PRODUCT PICKS Guest Picks: Words to Live By

By Danyelle Mathews

Inspirational posters are back in style, and never have their wise words looked so good

HOUSEKEEPING Three More Magic Words to Help the Housekeeping Get Done

By Alison Hodgson

As a follow-up to "How about now?" these three words can help you check more chores off your list

ACCESSORIES Words to Live By: A Little Text for Your Wall

By Beth Dotolo, ASID, RID, NCIDQ

A few choice words in your design can instruct, entertain and mystify

KITCHEN APPLIANCES Find the Right Oven Arrangement for Your Kitchen

By KitchenLab Interiors

Have all the options for ovens, with or without cooktops and drawers, left you steamed? This guide will help you simmer down

Video Gift Guide: 43 Finds for a Festive Home Bar

Shake up a party-ready bar with gleaming accents, dashes of red and enough glasses for every lord a-leaping

KITCHEN DESIGN How to Find the Right Range for Your Kitchen

By KitchenLab Interiors

Range style is mostly a matter of personal taste. This full course of possibilities can help you find the right appliance to match yours

Sponsored

Daniel Russo Home

13 Reviews

Premier Interior Design Team Transforming Spaces in Franklin County