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Mom, not best friend.

Posted by pensivet (My Page) on
Mon, Jun 2, 08 at 15:43

Any of you young single parents have trouble getting older kids to recognize your "authori-tah"? I'm practically in my teen's age bracket, and when I try to call her out over her phone bills (who the heck calls directory assistance 20 times in 3 weeks?!), she acts like I'm barely qualified to tell her what to do. I mean, I try giving her options, like using free-411 instead of using the carrier option, but frankly I need to feel like I can actually put the hammer down instead of negotiating all the time. Any advice?

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: Mom, not best friend.

Sorry to say this, but you are probably behind the curve on this one. The lines probably should have been drawn a long time ago. However, there is still hope - maybe after age 17 - LOL.

It's tough for any parent with teens, even those with both parents around. Just remember that good communication eventually works. That means you need to use something besides a hammer. At this age, she will just go out and get a bigger hammer i.e., find more ways to agitate or get around your common sense.

Best wishes!

RE: Mom, not best friend.

Mary is right - you needed to establish boundries as soon as the child was born. I'd say you have your work cut out for you and perhaps some counseling regarding boundries and respect is in order.

RE: Mom, not best friend.

Who's paying the phone bill?
If you are, you have every right to take the phone away. If you say she needs to have it in case of emergencies, then only let her have it when she's out and about.
If someone else is paying the bill, then choose your battles. This one isn't yours to fight.

RE: Mom, not best friend.

I'm with Jean. There is a Golden Rule which says, "He/She who makes the gold, makes the rules."

RE: Mom, not best friend.

Hmmmmmmmm, when I said that Say said, I got flamed/called out - even though it IS true - he who pays calls the shots.

RE: Mom, not best friend.

But Jo, trying telling that to a teenager, especially one that has never learned that to begin with. Like we said, that lesson is learned well before those years, and woe to those who didn't get that part right in the beginning. It's not all bad though. Most of the time they become human after a few years.

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