It’s November 2018. I haven’t had my haircut since my last bad haircut from about 2 or 3 years ago. I really have never had a good haircut. Ever. I have never walked out of a salon appointment and said, “Wow!”, I look and feel fabulous! Never. Honestly, I’ve had so many bad haircuts as a woman, bad hair color jobs. My last bad haircut escapade was today at a curly hair specific salon in my area. I have frizzy hair at times, with some annoying fly always, and a slight wave. I asked for help with this. They said they could help. But they did nothing to help alleviate those issues. I brought pictures, asked what they thought would look best with my hair texture, density, diameter, face shape, lifestyle and the owner pointed to one said style. So I trusted her. I told them about my bad hair cut experiences and I was worried about getting another bad haircut. I told the trainee and the owner who is supposed to be the most experienced and best at what she does there. I told them what I did not want, what looked terrible on me in the past, where I wanted my bangs to fall (a swoop like choppy bang that was longer and fell below my eyebrows but not poking me in my eyes. You know half way between my brows and eyes. And not make them thin looking. And to give me layers that would give me the look of width at my cheekbones, to shorten the appearance of my long thin face. I got instead faux layers, that didn’t add width at all to my face, short thin wispy bangs that are a bit above my brows. She cut them way too short and said that she would do what I asked and have them fall longer between my brows and eyes. She suggested I get a straight across bang, cuz she thought it would look better(the owner said this, and did my bangs). She did not do what she said. She did the opposite of what I told her that I wanted. It’s called Anti-Listening. Or horrible customer service. Let’s just give our customers the opposite of what the asked for! She gave me the worst short ugly bangs that I told them not to give me. I hate my hair/haircut. I look so ugly now. I’m so upset that this happened to me again. I’ve never been to this salon before and got the trainee who they told me had 13 years as a stylist in a salon. Which was a lie. She just recently graduated from hair school and has only been in the field for a year and a half. I was definitely deceived. I would’ve never gone to her, if I knew this. She did basic stuff and the owner came over quite a bit telling her how to do this and that. I was wondering why a experienced stylist would need help with the most basic of cutting techniques.... and supposedly she was trained thoroughly in the techniques of the curly salon, as the urged me, that I could have utter confidence her abilities, still not knowing that she was inexperienced as a stylist. It was only until after I was getting my haircut by her, the trainee, that she wasn’t experienced really. I was like, Oh Shirt! WTF. Then, you would think the owner would be an awesome stylist and not butcher someone’s hair, let alone bangs. But she butchered my bangs. I look terrible. Then they wanted to take my picture of before and after. The before was fine. But the after pics my stylist took, were the most unflattering pics, that made my nose and eyes look, unflattering. I would not agree to them putting my face up on their site. Just the back of my hair. Ugh. How am I going to go out in public? They said to me, wow you look great! But they never asked me how I liked my hair. I was not happy. I felt depressed and was in shock. Then it came time to pay. $40. Then the tip. I hate the whole tip issue. I hate tipping. It’s stupid. It’s forced guilt. I was confused. They had the labels above the tips like this... Good(15%,), Great(20%), (Wow!(30 or 40%), Custom etc. I wasn’t sure what to do. I was afraid to do no tip, even in spite of my bad haircut experience. So I picked (Good-15%). The desk attendant asked me how I liked my cut, I just said the non committal thing, “I don’t know, I have to let it sink in”. I really wanted to say, I look like s**t. Thanks for making me want to cover my head with a paper bag! And the owner came up to me and asked if I remembered all the instructions about how to style my hair. I said yeah, the best I can remember. But nothing in asking how satisfied I was. She really didn’t care. And my stylist just said a lame goodbye and scoffed me off, like dandruff and moved onto her next client. Whatever. Then their bathroom was dimly lit, I could barely see in there and there wa nothing to dry my hands on, and barely any soap. This is supposed to be an upscale salon. And the bathroom was just bad. My face now looks longer and thinner than it did with my longer hair and not wider in the least. In whom can I trust with my hair? I think the reality is, No One. No matter what they say, no matter what you tell them, what pictures you bring, no matter what you emphatically tell them no to do to you, or do, they will do whatever they dang well please. And I don’t believe you can ever know until the damage has been done, what you will ultimately get in the end. It’s really unbelievable. What’s wrong with this world? I am so not wanting to step into another salon ever again, when you just can’t trust any stylist to give you a good cut/style. I honestly don’t know what to do. The only thing I can think of is just not get my haircut again. Cuz it just doesn’t end well. Sad.

OK. I am finding this too weird. I thought I was catlover. For some egocentric reason I was sitting here wondering how many posts I had made and another catlover showed up. Scary thing is that I have something to say. My son -- now 25 -- left college -- Amherst College -- unexpectantly in late October of 2001. We live half way across the country but had been there to see him that weekend in an athletic event. He was -- and is (he is my son) handsome, smart, and athletic. The Monday we left he dropped a note in the mail telling us he had to leave. He said he was fine. He would be home for Christmas, but we would otherwise not hear from him. I freaked out, emailing the world. He picked that up and called. He came home. He was sad. He, who was in his 2nd year, saw his education as a waste of our money. He felt he could educate himself. He worried that he was doing what society expected him to do. He was home for a bit. He worked with Americorp for a while. He sold pizzas far away and lived with a bunch of guys. He returned to college the next fall. I begged him to do so. I told him he to be anything he wanted -- a vagabond, etc., but please finish college. No expectations would be attached to finshing. He did -- he wandered through a a bit of an english major, a philosophy major, a math major, and he finally settled on geology (he loves the outdoors). He is very introspective. He fell in love. He says the best thing he got out of college is his "now wife." He finished college and taught young children for a year. He is now in an Ivy league law school hoping to work on human rights and consitutional issues as an attorney. Money is not his issue. Hang in there. I truely believe what makes my son a caring, passionate person is what made him leave school. Isn't retrospect a wonderful thing? Adele a/k/a catlover

It's very hard to stand up for yourself when the person who's lashing out is somebody you love, but if you don't put a stop to it, then it gets worse, until everything including the weather & the price of gas is your fault. I don't know how to tell you to do it, but when hubs starts blaming you, you must nip it in the bud. I would envision myself putting up a hand, palm out, & saying, "Whoa. You need to talk to your daughter about what she does, & you need to take responsibility for what you do. I will take responsibility for what I do, but not for what anybody else does. The scapegoating has to stop right now." I think that would be a big step toward disengaging, & it might give hubs some insight into the fact that *he* needs to disengage too; he didn't make her forge checks, he didn't make her have a child she isn't ready to take care of, he didn't do the things she's doing: He didn't do these things, & he isn't responsible or guilty. She is doing them, & she's responsible. About the threats...has anyone filed a police report? This guy is dangerous, & no matter how she arrived at her personality or habits, it sounds like your stepdaughter is just as dangerous. time to put up some walls or armor; you & hubs must get on the same side & protect yourselves, or the situation will escalate, & violence is likely. I wish you the best.

Took Makayla to a mall that has a LLBean and got her a new bookbag. As we walking through the mall, some girl came up and tapped me on my shoulder. I turned and looked really funny. 'Like I am suppose to know you!' Come to find out her and went to high school/ cosmetology school together 35 years ago!!! I just cannot believe she knew who I was! Then I met with a Myspace friend at Starbucks. She is from Alabama and I know her daughter. Makayla and I then went to Toys R Us to look at what size bike she to get. We found one and I will pick it up after she goes home. Since it is for her birthday which is the end of September. Now, she is watching cartoons while I am on here and finishing up my homemade crab soup. Deb