What I've become convinced of is that in my short time as a mother, everyone thinks they've figured IT out once they find something that works for them. But really, you haven't figured IT out, you've only figured IT out for you and your child - and no doubt about it, the relationship between mother (or parent) and child is a relationship like any other, requiring give and take, and you have to figure out what works for BOTH personalities, not just one. There are also many paths to the same outcome. Just because your 7 year old or even your 7th grader is not yet capable advocating for themselves in a school setting does not mean that they won't be when they are a bit older. I wasn't, I was painfully shy and would have just "suffered in silence" if I had to handle it all on my own - yet by the time I went to college I was most of the way toward being capable of taking care of myself and went the rest of the way while in college. By the time I went to grad school I regularly went head to head with people far smarter than I am and learned a lot in the process and I can assure you that even as a freshman in college, mommy and daddy did nothing but offer a sympathetic ear or sage advice even though they had been more involved in the 7th grade. It is not about the perfection or lack thereof in life, it's about recognizing what is the best way for you to help your child become the person you (and they) wish them to be. Babies do not have to be "independent" at 3 months old, kids do not have to be mini grownups and "get it" (all of it, the big picture) by middle school to become independent, capable young adults. I know there is a lot of lamenting about the current generation and their seeming inability to act like adults but I would argue that this is the product of lack of attention when they needed it as children rather than too much attention (and substitution of "stuff" for involvement by parents). The kids who turned out that way are most often belonging to parents who never bothered to think about how their choices would affect their children in the long term at all - not about the parents who thought about it in the first place and "chose wrong" by speaking to a child's teacher or homeschooling or whatever else you think is wrong with what other parents are doing.

I was a Sylvan instructor during grad school. The general format was that children were individually assessed for a variety of competencies, and then given a program designed to address the results of the assessment. Instructors worked with a group of 5-6 in any given session, but only with one at a time (work with child "a" while the others were working on their exercises, then rotate around the group). The program was very methodical and specific - designed to target specific problem areas and build on them. Regular assessments provided direction regarding how each student needed to progress. One thing I appreciated was that an important characteristic that was required in tutors (at least at this center) was an encouraging attitude. Kids were motivated through encouragement and being shown specifically how they were growing and progressing, I also found that children enjoyed the element of friendship that evolved as they'd see each other regularly. Now, having said that, this was 12 years ago. I'm not as familiar with the Sylvan of 2007, but perhaps this can give you at least some helpful information. For what it's worth, I also worked as a private tutor during that same period of grad school, with children in grades ranging from 1st-12th. My experience was that there were advantages to both tutoring formats.

"graywings, For goodness sakes, this is a healthy young couple making $140,000 a year and no credit card debt. They have a family support network. And they obviously have put some thought into this." they do have debt. they spend about $950 @ month on car and student loan debt. $950 is a lot money for the next several years. in 5 years they will have spent $57,000 in payments plus whatever interest is there. they should have paid those off with their 20% and re-save. in 2-3 years they would have had their 20% again w/o ANY debt. The poster also mentioned that he and his wife would like to have children in the next 2 or 3 years. May I point out that daycare alone is probably way more than $950/month - so that money may already be encumbered. I think the point we fiscal conservatives are making is not that the OP shouldn't buy a house, it's just that the goal of buying or building a dream house may be out of reach in these uncertain economic times. Actually it is often out of reach for one's first house. The OP absolutely has the means and ability to buy a house and he definitely should move forward. But I happen to think the cost is on the high side and may create future stresses (e.g., HAVING to work to meet a mortgage payment versus being able to downshift one's work schedule to meet family needs). My husband and I have a similar gross income as the OP without car or student loans and there is no way I could imagine paying $2600/month for P&I and taxes and insurance and still have enough money to meet our needs. OTOH, we have two children - can I say they are incredibly expensive? We spend about $100 a WEEK on tutoring, music lessons and sports on my daughter alone. While we can look forward to tutoring ending within the next 6 months (and saving $65 a week), it's not an optional item that we can cut.

You can find many private tutors online these days. Check out http://www.BestTuition.com You can have live video classes at your home with your preferred budget. You can choose tutor as per your budget. Here is a link that might be useful: http://www.BestTuition.com