Yes, you should be worried, but no, there is not much of anything you can do about who the neighbor rents to. I would try to get off to a good start with the renters so that you have a line of communication established with them. Is there any chance you could convince her of the dangers of being an absentee landlord?

Having gone down the road with a MIL losing her cognitive ability, I would encourage you to take over her finances as much as you are able. The un-balanced checkbook may be just the tip of the iceberg. My (ex) husband waited much too long with his mother, and found out that she was thousands upon thousands of dollars in debt. It is common for people to try to hide the fact that they are losing their cognitive ability.

graywings, luckily, dh is on his mother's checking account so he can see where she is spending money. But that's one of the reasons we know we need to be closer to her. Right now we are 7 miles away, which isn't bad but we don't see her every day. The chances are probably slim, but it would be ideal if we could find 2 houses on the same street in town.

It would be nice if we could buy the house next door, but the neighbor doesn't want to sell. I did tell her the problems we had with an absentee landlord and the problems we had being an absentee landlord when we weren't able to sell a house after dh was transferred and we even had a real estate company handling things. She didn't listen.

This post was edited by marti8a on Thu, Aug 8, 13 at 11:26

I'm a little confused (pretty common!) -- are you worried about your property values? or worried about your neighbor? This is an unrelated neighbor and you have access to her checking account?

Maybe offer to help with fixing her house up? Arrange for storage or sale of some of her furniture?

Lots of perfectly "normal" people do look for furnished houses, though. Hard to say who might rent there without knowing what your neighborhood is like and the rental market and employment situation in your area is.

Martie8a, If your Mom needs to live closer but isn't so bad off that she actually needs to move in with you and your neighbor needs to rent out her house but you're worried about who might move in; have you considered solving your neighbor's problem and both of your problems by renting your neighbor's house for your Mom to live in????

I think you're mentioned before that you Mom doesn't want to live 7 miles out of town but if her cognitive abilities have declined to the point where she can no longer balance her checkbook, it may already be time for her to stop driving. And if not, that point will come quite soon. Once she needs someone (probably you or DH) to drive her to the store/doctor/hairdresser/visits to friends/etc, you'll probably find that it is easier to do if she is right next door to start with than if you have to travel 7 miles to pick her up, run her errands, and then travel 7 miles back home.

Worse, in the not too distant future the time is likely to come when she will NOT be able to continue living alone no matter how nearby you are. If you buy a house for your Mom now, within 6 months to maybe 2-3 years at most, you're likely to find yourself with an extra house on your hands that you will either need to sell or find a renter for.

Maybe the neighbor's house isn't in the very best condition - if neighbor has been out of work for a year, she has probably let regular maintenance issues slide. But, If by "non-working fixtures", you mean light fixtures and/or plumbing fixtures, those kinds of things are usually easy and not terribly expensive to fix. I suspect that, in return for knowing that her house would be rented by someone who would NOT further tear it to pieces, your neighbor might be quite happy to take a reduced rent for the first month or two to offset the cost of you paying up front to have any broken fixtures repaired...and maybe the cost of a paint job or other minor fix up details before your Mom moves in.

And, if your Mom has plenty of furniture of her own and doesn't need to rent a furnished place, the neighbor's furniture could go into a storage unit. A 100 sq ft unit, properly packed will hold a LOT Of stuff and, in my area, rents for less than $100/month.

Just a thought...

Oops, I can see where that could be confusing. I corrected it so no one else is confused.

When the neighbor first mentioned that she was going to rent the house, I hoped the renters would maintain the yard. I told the neighbor that renters won't take care of her furniture but she doesn't have the money to move it or anywhere to put it at her dd's house. After dh's comment, I wondered if the renters would trash out the yard and yes, affect our ability to sell at the price we need.

I've never really heard of anyone renting out a furnished house. Maybe near a college, but not out where we are. Even newlyweds have some of their own furniture.

The advice to get to know the people from the first is a good idea. At least then we might be able to talk to them before problems escalate. We have such good neighbors on our street, and a policeman or two, so I'm probably just overthinking or over worrying.

A couple of thoughts.

There's nothing you can really do about her renters. With any luck, someone like our neighbor might move in. They rent and have a DIY bug and have already improved their rental's curb appeal with yard work and a nice patio (husband hardscapes for a living).

I think if you buy a second house for your MIL, you will be trying to dump that house sooner than you think. And no, she should not be driving. I live in an area with a high elderly population and it's not uncommon for people to become disoriented and drive off roads or into buildings or drive to a isolated picnic spot and stay there. Good luck.

bevangel, we did think of that. But the neighbor's house has so many condition issues that we don't really want to touch it. I love my neighbor and I do understand she is a single woman with no money, but for years she has farmed out repairs to friends, or friends of friends who will do it cheaper than a professional. For instance, she had the engine on her car replaced by a friend and after that couldn't get it inspected. She had a friend work on her home's a/c and now the fan runs all the time, even when the system is on off. I have no idea how she is going to handle repairs when she is 1000 miles away but I bet it won't be by calling a repairman, and I guarantee it won't be us doing it. I don't know that she would ever move back here, but I don't want to ruin our friendship by having a family member rent her house or put her furniture in storage.

Mil has been really lonely since they moved here 4 years ago. After fil died last year, a few of the widows in her church rallied around her and they go do things during the week and visit back and forth. One has made a habit of coming over several times a week to play games. If she moved out here, that would all stop. And no, she can't move in with us. I love her, but it would only be a few weeks before I was ready to kill her, or dh, or both of them, or anyone who crossed my path after a long day with her.

At least a house in town would be easy to keep as a rental, especially if it were near the college. Mil could keep her friends, and I could keep my sanity. Also, my mother is about 8 years behind mil, so we'll be dealing with this again in a few years with her.

I'm not sure what the "right" thing to do is. Dh & I have been discussing selling or adding on since fil first began having severe problems about 6 years ago, maybe longer. It was right for them to move here from their home town because mil just couldn't car for fil on her own. But since they moved here, we knew something would have to be done when one or both of them needed more supervision.

Mil is still fairly sharp, but she just doesn't want to do things that take a lot of time or concentration, like balancing her checkbook. I don't think she should be driving anymore but not because she is in danger of getting lost, but because I don't think her reflexes are quick enough to avoid an accident. I've told dh my opinion, but it's not my call. I just pray she doesn't have an accident and hurt anyone.

This post was edited by marti8a on Thu, Aug 8, 13 at 13:04

A house with "condition issues" that is already furnished won't attract the best quality renters. I think right now before she moves is about as good as you can expect that property to look. With you wanting to sell, I think I'd rush to get everything ready and get it on the market as quickly as possible. Or, be prepared to outwait the rental situation for a few years and hope it doesn't go into foreclosure with an even more downhill slide.

Marti, there are steps you can take that your MIL may even find to be in her best interest, or view it as a challenge where she wants to 'prove' herself as my own mother did - in regard to the driving. It could also answer some other questions about her daily abilities you may have.

Last Fall, mothers doctor asked her not to drive while he was investigating what may have been a TIA that left no after effects detectable - the TIA did take place while she was on the way to the Y to swim, she pulled over and sat for several minutes while her vision and thoughts cleared, then drove herself home :(

When nothing treatable was found to be present, and she'd gone several weeks not driving (difficult because none of us are within 2 hours of her home and she's a very active 86 year old, home only about 1 day a week), doctor said he couldn't take the legal responsibility of saying yes she could drive again.

Her insurance wouldn't cover a driving evaluation (driving isn't medically necessary!), and optional testing at the state patrol could then have been a legal revocation of her license if she'd been asked to take a driving test and for any reason, like getting nervous or self conscious, she failed.

To resolve things, I took her to a licensed occupational/physical therapist across the river in Oregon who was recommended by their Dept of Licensing. We had to pay out of pocket but the fee was more reasonable than the services I found closer to her home. The therapist evaluated vision, range of motion, cognitive thinking, fine motor skills He took her out in a car following his office testing and actually observed her driving.

He did find her in good physical and mental health, said he would approve resuming driving in writing for her doctor if she would take two brush up classes regarding rules of the road, specifically how to correctly make a turn in an intersection without cutting off the lane she was entering, and making a right hand lane change - mother was capable of but did not know that using mirrors for a right hand lane change isn't approved, that she should have been in the habit of physically looking over her shoulder. The criticism made her furious, but she did take two classes and resumed driving, and we are a little more confident that some short term memory issues are not an immediate concern.

If your neighbor is leaving the state, why in the world wouldn't she want to sell her home? That seems the simplest option: sell the furniture, sell the house, make a new start in the new state.

Thanks for your suggestion morz8. We may need to look into that one day.

weedy, I can't figure it out either. I know after a few months of dealing with problems, she will wish she had sold it.

Is the neighbor's house paid for? I know you probably have no idea, but maybe you can present an option like this...

Can we move mom in, rent free, and we'll work to fix up the house over time agreeing to no more in repairs than $X per month (and, it'd be low, because you'd likely be diying it, and therefore contributing labor free). Anything more than that, and she'd have to pay for the fixes (something major came up).

There are costs with renting. If the house is in disrepair, she is probably not going to have the funds to call (from out of state) a plumbing company to fix the clogged toilet, sink, etc that will inevitably occur, but which you, if you were the renter, would be able to easily fix.

If she has no income to pay for those repairs, she won't have a paying renter for long.

Maybe this would offer her a solution (though, you'd want to make sure she isn't having to pay a mortgage, because she wouldn't be getting income from you for rent). But, this way you can also help fix up the curb appeal and interior, so when it is time for you to move out/on, your house will be more attractive.

I have no idea if this is possible, but with all the stuff you've done to your house it would seem possible that you might be able to "take on her house" for a year or 2...

She has a mortgage but I don't know what her payments are.

Since you have experience being a landlord, can you offer to help her interview prospective renters, and thereby possibly have some influence over who your neighbors might be?

As a lifetime renter, I can assure you that we are not all horned creatures bent on ruining your neighborhood or parking our old, rusted-out cars on cement blocks in the front yard, while we sell crack out of the back.

You snobby assumptions are pretty offensive.

scarlett, as a long time landlord, I have great respect for my fine tenants who take great care of my properties. But I also work hard to keep my places in good condition and repair every nonworking fixture or bad condition. Good tenants will not rent a poorly maintained residence, they don't need to, good landlords work to attract and retain the good ones, that leaves the bad ones to rent the poorly maintained properties.

That is the OP's valid fear, it is not snobby, just as you wouldn't want to rent next to the property with old, rusted-out cars on cement blocks in the front yard, while they sell crack out of the back.

There are many good renters who would be happy to pitch in and clean, paint, weed, etc. in exchange for a little rent reduction. That's what I do and my landlord and I have happily coexisted for many, many years.

Long term rental agreements/relationships are also not the norm, Scarlett.

The OP has a valid concern which isn't snobbish. Instead of calling names, perhaps you could have offered a solution such as what you finally came around to doing (though not directly)--
Perhaps she could find a tenant who is willing to do some regular DIY for reduced rent. But, you still have to screen those--find one that has done this in the past and has a reference to back up their ability to do quality work...

They don't just show up. And, often, a person might *think* or *want* to be able to have that arrangement, but in actuality, it doesn't work out.

Thank you cmarlin and kirkhall. No snobbishness intended, just curiosity if there was a concern over renting a run down, fully furnished house as I am not familiar with what is currently desirable and a furnished house was not desirable when we last rented a house many, many years ago.

She is having 2nd thoughts about renting, mainly because she doesn't want anyone to further damage her house. She has a 90 day temp job now and it could turn into full time so she may not have to move. That would be the best for her at the moment.

Thanks for all the comments.