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okay so I went ahead and did it

Posted by cicadidae (My Page) on
Fri, Oct 29, 10 at 10:36

She is a 9 month old pug and I got her because our family seemed to need another dog and because our pyr mix seemed to need someone to care about.
She has become queen of the house instantly. Loves cats. Bonded to me very quickly (maybe too quickly?). Barks and snarls sometimes at my roomie (but then this is just day 2). I don't put up with it and if she does it when I am holding her I say "no" and put her on the floor. She stops right away and even goes to my roomie for attention. I allowed her to sleep with me last night but I am wondering if this will make her bond to me too much and decrease the chance of her bonding with the rest of the family. Although she was crated in her previous family, she grumbles and whines when put in it and I gave in (wanting my own sleep) and let her into my bed.
Obviously she is a terrific dog. I had no clue pugs were so smart either! I want her to be a happy family dog who does not bond to just one person and who is not insecure when I am not around.
The other thing I am worried about is if I should take her with me when I go to work. I work with foster kids and they would love to meet her. My days are long and involve a lot of traveling. My concern again is, will this extra time with me reinforce her bond with me and diminish the possible bonds with the rest of the family?
Okay so this is day 2 and I am probably expecting too much. She probably misses her previous family who totally adored her and I probably need to relax and allow her to grieve and adjust.
Any gentle suggestions would be appreciated.


Follow-Up Postings:

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RE: okay so I went ahead and did it

Take a deep breath - everything will be fine. She is a very lucky dog to have found you and she sounds like she will be a terrific member of the family. You both need time to settle in and soon you won't remember when she wasn't there.

What is her name?


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RE: okay so I went ahead and did it

Her name is Marley. She knows her name so I don't think it would be right to change it.
I researched pugs and learned that they can hold their own with larger dogs. I knew that Jake was a gentle giant and he is. I am so proud of him. He gets down with his front legs spread out to show that he is submissive and wants to play. He does not step on her and when she seems like she has had enough of his antics (rushing around with toys and sidelong looks of "look what I have!") he sits politely at the end of the yard and smiles at her.
I am going to leave her in her crate next to Jake for the next few hours so that when my roomie gets home they can talk and bond. She can go on rides with me once I know that she understands that she is a member of a family that loves her, not attached to my hip. Somehow I think taking her with me at this time might reinforce her insecurity.


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RE: okay so I went ahead and did it

I'm no doggie psychologist, nor have I ever had pugs, but I do have a very sensitive little Iggy mix, whom I brought home from a volunteer surrender to the shelter. He had terrific separation anxiety when I first brought him home, although he is very people friendly and intelligent. My husband was away from town at the time, and he needed a lot of 'togetherness' and positive warm fuzzies.

It did not create any one person situations here. The little fellow not only sleeps with me, he insists on slipping under the covers and plastering his body against my tummy every night. However, he is just as devoted to my spouse whom he sees as the go bye-bye man and the dog walker and under the table food slipper. What we do seems interchangeable as is his obedience and displays of affection.

I am more the alpha disciplinarian and nail clipper.......but he seems comfortable with either one of us, and just as devoted. This may be somewhat breed dependent and he may turn out as he turns out regardless of what you do.


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RE: okay so I went ahead and did it

I have had dogs bond very strongly with me and could really live without other people but they were special cases, dogs that had come from very bad experiences and had major trust issues so they bonded so strongly because I actively worked on gaining their trust which is something they never knew before and something that wasn't very easy for them.

But all our other dogs have always bonded well with me and DH, my current 2 dogs spend much more time with me but when DH comes home they race out the back door to greet him at the garage, or jump on the bed during the night and bark at him to wake him up for a cuddle, and I dont think they favour either of us over the other.

In most cases dogs will bond with anyone who takes the time with them, so if you want them to bond with other family members then those family members simply need to feed them, or give them treats, or just pay them attention but if you are the only one who does that, then that's who they bond strongly with so I would give her a chance to get to know everyone before taking her to work and have her spend all her time with you, but i wouldnt worry too much because she isnt a dog that's been through years of trauma, and she wont struggle to make those connections with people.


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RE: okay so I went ahead and did it

I have a little girl pug too and she is the most loveable thing!! She does sleep cuddled next to me every night and I wouldn't have it any other way. That snoring, adorable little face makes my day every morning. Yes, she has bonded with everyone in the family, hubby, kids and is happy to be with anyone of us. Pugs crave human companionship, that is what they were bred for originally. (for the chinese emperors). So no, you can not give her too much attention or make her only "bonded" to you by loving her and taking her with you. My pug sits on the steps every time my hubby or I grab our car keys waiting for the "yes you can come" or "we'll be back". She gets it, but sure tries to go every where with us. She is part of the family. Don't thinks so much, just enjoy her!! As above poster said, dogs will bond with anyone who feeds/pays attention to them. Enjoy!!


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RE: okay so I went ahead and did it

Thanks so much for the feedback! At first she growled at us when we entered the room or came in the door but no more. Now she does growl out the car window at people she thinks she does not trust.
She seems to have figured out dogspeak for "get back in your bed!" and has the pyr mix behaving all night long. She sleeps in my bed with me. He has a big overstuffed chair across the room. When he gets out of his chair, she makes strange noises and paces the bed perimeter and he hops back into his chair immediately.
To be quite honest, she is not excited about being Jake's (pyr)best buddy. We put her out in the yard with him and she does this amazing yodel thing at the gate until we rescue her. I think she is a little frustrated that we are not bright enough to get it that she is really almost human.
Yesterday we took her to petsmart and got to see her interact with other dogs, kids, and adults. No growling. She seemed to enjoy herself. I feel really good about this as this means that she will possibly like being a therapy dog with my foster kids.


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