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I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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Posted by Andrea (Jamaicabum1@aol.com) on Fri, Dec 28, 01 at 23:10
| Even my MOTHER, the woman who wouldnt let me pierce until I was 12. My daughter is 16months old and has -not much- hair. I worry, Isnt it dangerous?? What if they fall out and she eats them and chokes? Wont they bother her when she sleeps?? I cant even sleep with earrings anymore!! Any feedback is welcome. She sure would look even more beautiful!!! |
Follow-Up Postings:
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| I don't think I would pierce a young childs ears either. I ended up ripping the hole in mine when I was about 9 and had had them done at 6. My Mom never allowed me to wear dangles and hoops for fear they would get caught on something, but I ripped them out over time with the post earrings. I see too many little girls pulling at their earrings and losing them. Like my niece had hers done not long after she was born and she really hates them and doesn't want them~she's 4 now. I would wait. It's your child and your decsion. ~Leslie~ |
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| BTW~I got my ear fixed but it required out patient plastic surgery to repair it and keep a hole in there. No problems since then and I have a second hole that I got at 16. I just think that if I could rip them at 9, a younger kid could do it easier. Mine mostly occured from ripping sweaters and turtle knecks up over my head and later a helmet when I was riding 4 wheeler with my cousins. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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Of course people will do as they wish. But I would worry about a child 16 moths old getting her ears pierced. For one, why at that age? Secondly I would be concered about the ear-ring possibly falling out of the ear and the child putting it in her mouth. Little ones that age will put anything in their mouths, and they are always pulling at their ears, toes just everything. It is very possible that somehow during the pulling (It might would take time) that the earring could be pulled off and inserted in the child's mouth.
This is just my feeling on the subject. Everytime I see a child , or baby with their ear's pierced I think..why does this child have to have her ears pierced at such an early age? If the child doesn't have much hair I tend to look more at her ears with the ear-rings in them than I even do the child's face. I don't know why, but I do. If you don't want her ears pierced tell your mother-you don't. Don't let her pressure you into doing something like this -that doesn't have to be done. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| I finally had my daughter's ears pierced when she was 2 due to all the pressure from my mom, sisters, etc. She had them for about 6 months and then she became allergic to them. She is now 9 and can't wear any earrings at all. If you don't want her ears pierced, then don't. She is your daughter. Wait til she is old enough to decide herself. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| My personal opinion is don't pierce her ears. Like the previous poster said, she is your child and if you don't want to have it done, don't do it. I would wait until she is older so she can decide and can help take care of them. Just my two cents,
Meg |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| I had my daughter's ears pierced when she was about 3 months old. She was completely bald, and no matter how much pink I put on her, everyone commented how cute "he" was. I figured that piercing her ears would let everyone know she was a girl. She did OK with them, and never had any problems infection wise. But when she was about 10 months old, I went in to get her out of her crib after a nap, and noticed blood on the shoulder of her shirt. One of the earrings had gotten caught in a knitted blanket in her crib. I found the earring still in the blanket. They were starter earrings, the kids where the back kinda "snaps" into a small groove, so they were hard for me to get off to clean. I imagine it had to be pulled pretty hard to get it out. Then I started wondering what would have happened if the earring didn't get stuck in the blanket. She probably would have swallowed it if she had found it. I ended up taking the other one out, and let them close. She had them redone around 3 years of age, but gave me a hard time when it came to cleaning them. Again, they closed. If she wants them pierced again, it will be up to her as to when to do it. If she asked me right now, I would take her to the mall and do it. But, it would be her choice, when she is ready, we will go. I guess I shouldn't have made that choice for her. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| Good for you. I can't fathom a single reason to get a baby's ears pierced. I think that our children are confronted with so much limiting and damaging gender stereotyping as it is that as parents, we should be shielding them, rather than forcing this kind of crap on them. Add to that the number of safety issues, and I also wonder why in the world parents choose to force their children to undergo ear piercing. I also think that it's a violation of a child's body. I know that's kind of an extreme position, but the baby didn't ask to have holes put in her ears. Why not wait until she's at least old enough to ask for them -- better yet when she's old enough to understand and to care for them. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| Of all the things to make moms feel guilty about - I can relate. My DD just turned 4. Ever since she was born, I have been receiving guilt trips from other moms of girls - they actually told me I was cruel to NOT pierce her ears. My feeling is: I had mine pierced as an older girl, and it was a great mom-daughter thing - to this day I remember the day we went and did it. We also did a trip to get a mani/pedi on the same day. I almost fell for the guilt trips but now I'm glad I didn't do it yet. I'm looking forward to the day that she asks for the earrings herself and we do it as a mom-DD trip! |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| I have two friends (they don't know each other) who both had their dd's ears pierced at 7 - 8 months because they were so tired of people calling their daughter "he". However, it continued to happen, despite the earrings and pink outfits. I think there are just a lot of people out there who aren't very observant, and will casually call a baby "he" or "she" without really looking for clues to the baby's sex or considering the mother's feelings. If you want your daughter to look more girly for outings, you could try a frilly bonnet. BTW, I caved to pressure from my dd to have her ears pierced when she was 5. (I had to wait until I was 10). As someone else suggested, we left her little brothers at home and made it an mom-daughter event. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| Do not pierce her ears until she is old enough to want them and take care of them herself. Saftey issues aside, what if you do it now and she grows up and doesn't want pierced ears? There is no reason to pierce them now- wait until she's ready, not when your mom is ready. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| After being allergic to metals myself, and having to sit on not one but THREE nieces to clean their ears or change their earrings, I have decided to let my DD decide when to get them pierced, if ever. When she is old enough to ask, I will surely bring her to have them done. Now mind you, almost every day I get a call or message or remark from my mother, her other grandma, MY grandma, both sisters, and even casual aquaintances about not piercing her ears. We just have to be strong LOL! 
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RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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Hi Andrea,
You should ask your mom and the others why they want your baby hurt unnecessarily. I have a 10 month old DD and not in a million years will I do that to her. When she's old enough to handle the pain, then she can decide for herself if she wants her ears pierced. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| Do what you want. On TLC last night they followed 11 births in different countries on the same day. One child had her ears pierced within 24 hours of birth. It is a cultural thing that I cannot criticize. But I personally would not pierce until later (9-12). |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| Andrea: I think she is your child and until she is old enough to make decisions on her own you should make the decisions you think are best for her. It really doesn't matter if everyone else wants her ears pierced, if you don't then it shouldn't get done. Conversely, if you want it done, then do it and don't worry about everyone else's opinion. If you are unsure then soliciting opinion is a good way to gather different points of view, but ultimately you have to do what YOU think is right. Mommabear |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| Andrea, your daughter is 16 months old and you are going to be getting lots of parenting advice from now on! Even well-meaning strangers will give you unsolicted advice. So, learn now not to bow to any pressure from others. If you have safety concerns, why not discuss this with her pediatrician? |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| If you`re not satisfied with the way she looks, get them pierced. And what about a tatoo as well. Many of them are quite attractive..Seriously, why would you take a chance on an infection at her age? Would the risk be worth it? Not to me..No judgement..just opinion. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| My 15mo dd will have her ears pierced when she wants them pierced. I asked lots of people, especially strangers, on checkout lines when they had their little girls ears pierced. Most had them done by 9mos! Even my ped recommended by 9mos. This was about a year ago when I started asking. I decided it's just another thing to worry about, so why bother!?! When she wants them done, she'll get them done, period. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| If you can justify having them pierced just to go along with the crowd, you won't be able to say much about her wanting to have other places pierced when she gets older for the same reason. Leave the ears for that time when SHE wants them done. There are a lot of beautiful women, some intelligent, some not so bright, in all walks of life that do not have pierced ears. A baby doesn't need them either. Nothing like having a badly scarred ear either. It happens sometimes when the ear gets infected. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| Do whatever you want. If you want to pierce her ears, go ahead. If you don't, don't. You don't have to do anything. My sister and I both had our ears pierced when we were 6 weeks old, and neither of us have had any problems. All three of my neices ears are pierced without incident. They have special post earrings for small children where the backs screw onto the post so that they don't fall out. They also make special hoops, but the only concern there would be them hooking their fingers in them and pulling. It's up to you what you feel comfortable doing. As you can see from the posters that there are a wide variety of feelings towards ear piercing from it being mutilation to just being something you do to make a little girl look pretty. Just remember, it's your child and you have to do what you think is best and thank the rest of them for their input. |
RE: I just cant pierce her ears - everyone keeps tellling me to
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| well i guess im a little more willing to do this since i did my dd's when she was 12 weeks old. we have never had a problem with them, she cried more when she had her first needle than when her ears were peirced. as for them falling out the clasps are locking and in all honousty there are so many other things around the house that they can choke on it never crossed my mind. i think they look great on her, she is now 2.5yo and tells people that she has pretty ears. i have been criticized by many and tell them to Mind THERE OWN BUISNESS as my dd probably would want them done when she is a teen anways. also for us it was a cultural thing as im italian and in my family they are done as a babtism gift. so i really get irritated when people are nasty to me about it. anyways its a decision that you have to make if you are not confortable with it don't do it! tell your mil to mind her buisness its your child. if you do decide to have it done enjoy it becuase i think its a cute thing to have done and you shouldn't be made to feel lousy if you do. nadine |
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