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Sign of Potty readiness

Posted by Michie1 (My Page) on
Mon, Sep 2, 02 at 13:04

My 14 mos old daughter has now began grabbing at her diaper when it's very full. I tell her that we need to change her diaper & she goes right over to her changing table. Does this mean she'll be ready for potty training sooner even though she drinks so much & has HUGE wet diapers?


Follow-Up Postings:

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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Probably you are jumping the gun. It is a good sign that she doesn't like being wet, but what she is doing, is actually normal for her age. Don't rush it. Kids will do it in their own time. Usually by 2 and a half to three, Although you hear about kids who make the transition early, they are the exception rather than the rule. Those kids also have a 'regression' phase where they suddenly start having accidents. Just change her more often. She should not end up with huge wet diapers, if she is changed every 2-4 hours. If she does, she is drinking way too much liquid.

A lot of your questions can be answered in books such as "What to Expect During the Toddler Years." I recommend you check out that book from the library and read thru it. It diescusses milestones, and how to handle issues, such as separation anxiety. I used it many times as my handbook for many issues.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

I really didn't feel my daughter would be ready NOW for potty trianing. I was just thinking this was an early sign that maybe when she turns 18 mos or so - in Dec. I might be able to start with her. I don't plan to rush her, which is why I was trying to figure out if this is a sign. As far as waiting until 3 - I think that's ridiculous. It's in recent yrs. you hear about that. When I was young kids were all potty trained by 2. I think too many parents are lazy on this subject.

She usually gets changed every 2 hrs. or so & as often as several times in an hr. b/c she does wet allot & does often have HUGE pee diapers. Yes she drinks allot - water & 1/2 gal of milk a day, but my pediatrician has no problem with it since not only is she a good eater but she's very thin (like her Mom & Dad were when we were young) & milk adds to her calorie intake.

As far as the What To Expect Furing the Toddler years - I borrowed it from a friend, read it & hated it. I had the What to Expect During Pregnancy & the 1 yr books & hated them too - too rigid. God forbid you ate anything not healthy during your pregnancy. I read plenty of web sites, magazines & books, but I personally like to ask around, including on sites like this to see what other REAL people experiences are.

Now that I think of it. Tomorrow my daughter goes back to her pediatrician for an ear re-check appt. She just got over her 1st ear infection. Now I'm wonderin gif she's grabbing at her crotch b/c she has a yeast infection (antibiotics do that to me) or maybe even a urinary infection, so I'll bring up those issues to the Dr.

Thanks for your help.

Michie


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Hmm,,,I thought the books were mainly common sense stuff, along with a lot of sanity checks, as milestones come and go. They helped me thru many a question as DD grew thru those years. The food and eating guides were common sense and based on the food pyramid and eating quality calories. But they didn't give grief in there about eating non-healthy things. Although I did avoid nutrasweet and caffeine, because the jury really is still out, and better safe than sorry. But they call it the 'best odds' diet because it really is based on simple, high-fiber, no-empty-calorie, food-pyramid theories that any nutritionist would agree with.

I'm still going on what I understand is the norm from pediatricians, and others. 18-month-potty-trained does happen, but is the exception. We may have to disagree on this one, because you have your feelings. Even in school, potty-trained is not a requirement until three. There are two keys to potty-training: maturity of the mind, as well as maturity of the bladder. While younger children may be able to hit the potty enough to make you think they are ready, all children differ on when the bladder and body is ready to understand 'holding it' until they get to the potty. When it happens, it is almost overnight, because all the key things came together for success. You can search this forum for other pottytraining threads, and see that the age of 3 is not a 'new' or 'modern' trend.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

My dd told me 'peepee' and grabbed her crotch as well, probably around 14 months as well. That probably lasted another 5 months. After that, nothing, not a peep. Now, at 26 months, she has no interest, despite all the mommynagging I'm doing. Not really nagging, but I keep telling her that she should go like mommy does, that when she does use the toilet, we can get rid of the diapers and she can wear big girl underwear, like the sitters 7 & 9 yo girls. Goes in one ear and out the other, although she does get excited about wearing the big girl underwear (but not excited enough, I guess!)...


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

What you asked about is the very first sign, yes. When my son started to show this sign at 18 months, I had him "pee for fun". I would ask him to go in the bathtub when it was time to get out. Then, I would ask him to pee "on command" when he was on the changing table after undoing his dirty diaper, before changing into the new one. Then I waited, never brought it up again, until he wanted to. He asked me about trying it while we were out running errands one day. Of course, I would let him and we would discuss it a little then. When he started holding it in until I got him to the changing table (so he could do it on HIS command) I knew he was ready. He was potty trained completely, throughout the night even, by 27 months.

Once he went to big boy pants, that is no training pants or pullups, he never went back, despite his getting them dirty. Personally, I think wet pants on his skin is all that got him to do number 2 in the potty, and that's the hardest part of all.

Take advantage of this time to have fun and let her experiment with it. Potty training boils down to a control issue and its best to let them do what they feel comfortable with. Hope this helps!

-Robin


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

I'm waiting 1 more mos & will start the potty training when she's 18 mos. Although I have not intentions on presuring her & know most kids don't potty train so early since she's showing even more clues & interest in this I figured let me give it a shot. Who knows she might be one of the few who gets it early. If not, nothing lost.

Whenever I ask if she needs a diaper change she runs to her changing table. She often grabs her crotch & with #2 says "poo-poo". Of course it's after the fact. She knows how to say toilet paper (more like toy papa) & she grabs it & tries to put it in btn my legs when I'm on the toilet. She also just started taking toilet paper, crouching down & wiping herself (over her clothes). We have the books, I bought a potty & have character panties ready for enticement, so wish me luck. I'll be starting right after Xmas.

Michie


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Well it's months later & things were hectic in our lives plus I was pretty sick so we never officially started potty training at 18 mos like I had planned, even though the potty is out & she sits on it all the time on her own. I actually feel bad b/c my daughter how 22 mos today is practically trying to hit me over the head by telling me she's ready & I've done nothing about it. She removes her diaper when it's still wet & warm, she has removed clothing & peed on the flr on many occassions & she removed her clothing & sits on the potty allot. My goal is to REALLY start doing this starting this wk. I was thinking of staying home for the next several wks so I could offer her the potty every 1/2 hr & was thinking of keeping her in panties so she'd pee on herself, but I also don't want her peeing on my carpet on the 2nd flr & the sofas, so that's something that concerns me. I know someone in a previous post mentioned about not confusing them by going from diapers to undies back & forth but there is no way I can see going out during the early stages of potty training & letting her pee herself, needless to say the hwole situation of how to handle the mess while out in public. Any good advice on what worked for your daugher would be great.

Also the thought of going #2 in a potty is actually disgusting to me - how do you clean it out without contaminating sinks,etc. I had wanted her to use a real toilet but I'm not sure how she's going to stay up without falling in - shes so skinny.

Michie


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

I never used potty seats. I used the real toilet, with the little padded seat that goes on top so their little bottom doesn't slide thru.

I wouldn't worry about the mess of cleaning the #2 out of the potty.

Trust me, you'll be cleaning plenty of it out of underwear over the next year or so. As they say, Accidents Happen.

(and don't put so much pressure on. She's not doing anything any other 2-year-old wouldn't do. She's just starting to be ready at 24 months. You aren't missing the boat or anything)


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

What do you mean not to worry about cleaning out potty of #2 - of course I'm going to worry? It's not like a diaper where you toss it all out. It you wash it out then you need to clean up the sink - gross!!! I don't think underwear is the same issue b/c you dump it in a bag or garbage & then throw the undies into the wash.

(and don't put so much pressure on. She's not doing anything any other 2-year-old wouldn't do. She's just starting to be ready at 24 months. You aren't missing the boat or anything)

Huh? What's that mean? Who's putting pressure. I'm just goign to start doing it now & be around to show her consistency. As I explained SHE is the one who has been showing signs fo rmos & it's me who did nothing to pressure her.

Michie


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Michie,
Sorry. Forgot how defensively you take posts.

As for pressure, I took it from these statements that you felt you were missing the boat and I just meant you need to relax. You're not missing the boat.
You had said,
"practically trying to hit me over the head by telling me she's ready & I've done nothing about it. "
"I was thinking of staying home for the next several wks so I could offer her the potty every 1/2 hr..."
I just meant that a lot of what she's doing is typical diaper/potty behavior at that age, and there's no need to feel that you have to do something asap. Didn't mean anything else.

And as far as the undies go, if you think you just dump the poop and toss in the wash, then...well...never mind...I guess I'll just let you experience it for yourself......no need to go further. It sounds like you have all the answers.

Hope you at least got some help from my tip about the potty seat, which allows them to go in the big pot. if you can see past the other stuff you read into my post.

good luck!!!!


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Great reply TREKaren --- you said everything I was thinking!


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

A lady I know uses the plastic grocery bags as liners for the potty chair and then tosses them out after the deed is done. It cuts down on cleaning.

As far as gross contamination of the sink, I usually just use it to put water in the seat for a rinse abnd then throw that water and any tissue I used to clean it out in the toilet. If you're still worried about cleanliness after that, you could always do a wipe down with Clorox wipes.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Thanks AdellaBedella - great ideas!

As for Trekaren - have you not noticed it's YOUR comments I get defensive about. You are ALWAYS inaccurately reading more into that what I ask & I don't ever remember when you've not attacked in your reply & seemed like whatever you do is the best way. When you see my name don't bothering answering if you insist on always being so pushy! Gee, you must be the perfect parent!!!

Michie


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Actually, Michie, I read your posts just to see if anyone can please you. You ask questions and then disagree with almost every reply you get. I think TREKaren has been very helpful with people on this forum and also on some of the other ones that she posts on. You seem to be the only one that gets defensive towards her. Maybe you should try loking at other people's responses to her and also take a closer look at your responses to her. When you post on here you are opening yourself up to people disagreeing with you or making suggestions for better alternatives. Try looking at her suggestions with a little more open mind and try not to take her suggestions as a personal attack, I don't think they are intended to be that.

TREKaren, please feel free to continue posting. We are all trying to learn from these posts. If your answers aren't helpful to Michie, they might be to someone else. Just because someone is the originator of a post it doesn't mean that they are the only ones interested in the topic. That is what public forums are all about. I may not totally agree with your opinions all of the time, butI do enjoy hearing differing opinions -- it makes me think and learn.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Dlynn,
Thanks. I'm just glad potty training is behind me. How many kids have you survived potty training with?

Michie,
Best of luck to you. You've got an adventure ahead.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

I've survived potty training 2 kids that are less than a year apart in age so it seemed like one very long stretch of potty training. Luckily, my oldest is a very, very deep sleeper and has never wet the bed. He even woke up with dry diapers starting at about 6 months old. By about 16months old we just quit making him sleep in diapers and put them on hin first thing in the morning. Learning to poop in the potty was a different story, though! He was completely potty trained and would stand there begging to have a diaper for his poop. He finally decided to poop in the potty after visiting Santa at the mall. While he was telling santa what he wanted I interupted and told Santa that I realized he would only get those things if he started to poop in the potty. My son was horrified and Santa thought I was nuts. When we got home he went straight to the potty and pooped in it and then asked to go see Santa. We went right back to the mall and told Santa what a big kid he was and that he could now get everything he asked for. Been using that potty ever since!


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

How funny! I have found with my DD and her friends, that it's amazing how 'mental' a lot of it is.

I think I mentioned in an older post above that one of my DD's mental blocking factors at home was that the potties at school were white, and the potties at home were tan. But it took me a while to get her to verbalize what was bothering her. It seems that at school, they kept encouraging her to "turn the water yellow". Well--- it is kind of hard to tell in a tan potty whether the water got yellow! LOL

You just never know!


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness...

I pulled a similar stunt as the Santa stunt with DS. He had been talking about the "green" birthday cake with candles, sand dunes, and Bob the Builder toys for a couple of months before his bday. I told him people who weren't potty trained didn't get to have turn three or have a birthday with green cake, candles, etc. We took him to Phoenix and visited my aunt who watches my cousin's two children. My cousin's oldest child is six weeks younger than DS. I told my aunt the same story about the cake. While we were visiting, DS and my cousin's little girl both decided to sit on the potty together. I think I only changed a couple of pullups after that. DS turned 3 last week. He's been potty trained for 1 1/2 months.

My cousin's little girl still isdn't potty trained, but I take pictures of my boys sitting on the potty and email them to my aunt. She said it's been a little bit of motivation. My cousin's little girl will at least sit on the potty. She used to refuse.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Looks like this thread has petered out. I hope to revive it as I need advice!

About a week ago my 2.5 year old son sat on the training potty and made pee. Since then we ask him several times each day if he wants to go and if he does he gets on and makes pee right away. We let him run around diaperless for a bit. If he pees, he realizes, stops the flow and we take him to the pot where the rest comes out. Right now it's all a game to him.

So, do I push and get him to start wearing the padded training pants? Or do I just continue with the game? He's pretty attached to his diapers it seems. When I've asked him about wearing his new underpants he is very negative.

I don't want to push or start too early. I learned w/ my older daughter that when kids are ready they learn fast, otherwise you're just setting yourself and child up for weeks/months of frustration. But at the same time, I don't want to miss the boat if he truly is ready.

One other bit of info. My son is not very verbal yet, so if he did really have to go, I'm not sure he could verbally tell me.

Any advice is appreciated. :-)

Thanks.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

If he's still limited, verbally, you should work on that - focus on encouraging him to talk - ask him questions, make him ask for things verbally instead of just pointing to things, all the other tricks and tips for getting them to verbalize.

This will also help him mature to a point to look at potty as less of a game.

From my experience, it's less 'training' than it is the child's maturity and the maturity of the child's bladder.

The trick is not only teaching them to go but also teaching them to hold it. And at 2-1/2, you have not missed the boat.

A lot of parents boast of less-than-two's going to potty and all that. It's possible but it is not the norm.

Once he's talking more readily, then GO FOR IT! Good luck!


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Hi ctmom. Looks like we're at around the same place with our potty training. My son is also 2.5 and we've just started the process. It has helped to have him watch his older brother to kind of see how it all works.

He's also pretty excited about the possibility of big boy underpants. Scooby Doo to be specific! I hadn't done much of anything until yesterday when we were all home anyway and I just kept him in big boy underpants. He had a couple of accidents, but was also able to hold it long enough to make it to the potty quite a few time. Right now though, it seems as if his bladder is still small and he's going a little bit quite frequently. I may need to wait a few more months when he's closer to 3 to really give it a push.

Good luck to you!

AM


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Hi TREKaren and AM,

Thanks for the words of advice!

AM, my son does the same thing regarding going frequently. He also seems to hold, release, hold release etc so I am never quite sure he's all the way done. I never knew boys had such good control. Checked with the DH on this one... haha.

From what I've observed from friends and "training" my older daughter who is now six, waiting to 3 is a good thing. 3-year olds seem to learn really fast. I pushed my daughter too much when she was 2.5 because of preschool concerns. She eventually did learn, but it was a long process. Had I waited a few more months I think she would have learned more quickly and have the same endpoint result anyway. Such is the overzealousness of being a first-time parent. Everything seems so much more laid back with #2.

Perhaps I just got a bit excited because he makes pee so readily when he sits on the potty.

So, Scooby underpants? My son has Nemo! :-)


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

My daughter is 2.5 also and I've been a little nervous lately about potty training since she'll be in pre-school in Sept. At her 2 yr. old check up the dr. said 2.5 was about when kids start learning so I'm not completely nuts yet, and she has wizzed in the potty and now on the toilet with the potty seat on it. I am bribing her with thoughts of Dora and Princess undies! LOL Now if I can only get her over her fascination with spitting!


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Oh, you have loads of time until next September! Right? You've got me a little a little nervous about pre-school as well now too! He'll be going to a new school and they don't accept non-trained kids.

The past few days have been great with potty training. He's been consistantly going on the potty and most of the time when he says he has to go, he actually does have to go. A few time, however, he'll say he has to pee, then nothing. We'll read, sing, hangout, then I'll suggest trying again later and he freaks. He refuses to leave the bathroom until he has gone. He is really stubborn. Any suggestions? I don't want to discourage him, but I don't want this to get out of hand either. He just spent 30 minutes sitting there and I had to drag him off.

AM


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

It has been so cold here the past few days that we haven't been going in the bathroom to try the potty (well, I have but it's too cold for her! LOL).

The other day I got her to stay on the seat by putting a tiny bit of nail polish on her finger. It fascinated her for awhile but I can't see her staying long enough so she's falling asleep on the toilet like those kids on Funniest Videos. Every time I ask her if she has to do poops she says no (even when I know she's going to). I think she might be embarrassed.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

blackcat, Thats a good observation. I can't tell you how many mental blocking factors my DD had, with potty training.

And a lot of the thought processes going on in their heads are so unbelievable. She rebelled at home after doing fine on vacations, or at preschool. Took me a couple of months to figure out that at school they had coached them about turning the water 'yellow', and at home our toilets are brown, and you can't see the color of the water very well. LOL

To get her over that block, I took her to the store and let her pick out a potty seat that was white, and made a big production out of it, and got over that block.

There were others - it's so funny when you finally figure out what is going thru their mind, and tackle a blocking factor.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Hi All,

My daughter just turned 2.5 too. She really shows no interest in the potty. She sits on the big stool with her potty seat, but thats about it. She wipes and says Im done without ever peeing. My friends say that pullups are a waste of money so I am not sure what to do???? Any suggestions? She loves her big girl panties but we just built a new house and I really don't want pee on the carpets.

I would love some advice.

Thanks.

Jen


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

Jen, the first time pee actually came out into the potty it shocked the heck out of all of us! LOL My daughter has done it a few times, but only in the last month 1/2 or so. Before that I would put her on the potty and she would sit awhile then want to run and play. Lately, instead of having the potty in the bedroom or living room (both carpeted) I took the top off and put it on the toilet. It fits well and she seems to be more comfortable. The bottom of the potty turns over and becomes a step stool.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

There are many schools of thought on pullups (just like there are for cloth as infants). You have to try them and see if they suit your needs. Only you know what works. Folks I know with more than one child say potty training is not text-book, and with each kid it was totally different.

One niece learned in one day and was 100% potty trained forever, even at night. The other niece just had her own ideas LOL and took forever.

I also tried the 'put them in big-girl pants and let them soil themselves and they'll hate it' method. HA! DD could care less that she had pee or poop running down her legs. She could sit in it and never say a word!

What seemed to get her into it the most was two things:
1) I told DH to not pee standing up when she was around - the one time he did it totally confused her, so while she was learning, he made sure to lock the door so she was not totally confused.
2) I always took her to potty with me, and I verbalized everything I did. That got her to want to be like Mommy and try to make the sound in the potty.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

TREKaren, we have diapers, pull-ups, training pants, and waterproof pants! AHHH! My general idea is the pull-ups are just non wash versions of the training pants...they leak then you get rid of them instead of washing them. Then, even if they say the sides can be ripped apart, you have to undress your kid to put a new one on. I say this, however, only using them a FEW times so others may love them, but a diaper I can re-attach is more convenient for me.

With my daughter, I'll sometimes say,"Why isn't she doing..." (insert any milestone here) then I find very shortly after she's doing it with no problem! LOL I'm hoping the potty, with a little more guidance from me, will be one of those things.


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RE: Sign of Potty readiness

i think many parents wait way to long for potty training now a days. Going Potty like a big kid can not only benifit ones self esteem , but it can also have many health related benefits. i let my kid watch me and daddy go potty tell him whats happening (saying mommy pooped or daddy pee pee or anything easy for a baby to say) and he wanted to sit on the potty today yayyyyy. He is now 14 months as well. remember to take advantage of this copy-cat stage while it is in season.


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