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terrible 3's please help

Posted by ashleykreay22 (My Page) on
Tue, Mar 26, 13 at 23:00

So to start off, this is about my niece. I am her nanny. I have raised her for the most part while mom was working and in school. She was the sweetest thing anyone could ever imagine until the day she turned three. She has only been 3 for about a week and a half but I am already going crazy and I am 30 weeks pregnant! She was potty trained, but now she walks in her room, takes her panties off and pees on her floor. She poops her pants, and poops in the bath tub. If I ask her to put something away, or to not do something she screams at me. When it goes to putting her to bed, it is a constant battle. Screaming, kicking, throwing things etc. I am sure a lot of it has to do with me not being her mom but this is what I do to live here. She is my job and being 30 weeks pregnant I am feeling like she is controlling me. I need help and it would be nice to not be bashed seeming how I am already emotional enough. Thank you

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: terrible 3's please help

Well, I guess if she has change her behavior, then it could be several reasons.

She could be more aware of what is going on around her, and might be reacting to the fact that her mother/father is not there. Maybe she realizes that you are not her parent.

Is she eating properly - nutritious food, plenty of fruit, veges, protein etc.

Is she getting enough sleep ?

If you have addressed all those basic requirements for a three year old and you still can't come up with a reason for her different behavior, then can I suggest that you look at the way that YOU relate to her.

Are you using a reward based system of discipline, or is there a lot of yelling and angry words. Have you tried a "time out" way of treating unsavory behavior ?

Children throw up lots of challenges, and as their carers we need to be one step ahead of them.

I think offering "carrots" for good behavior is a good plan. Such as "when we have both tidied up the toybox, we can go to the park". or "If you can poop in the toilet for a whole day we can go and frolic with the birds"

At that age, they like magical, silly, simple things, just think of all the things she likes, reading a special book, feeding the ducks etc, and you have your "carrot" system in place.

Always talk in positive words, remove any negative remarks, gloss over the bad behavior. You will find in a short amount of time she will start being retrained and will do the right thing.

Good luck - this is all good training for you when you have your own child !

Remember you are cleverer than her !

RE: terrible 3's please help

Agree with Popi ... well said !! Getting enough sleep helps too. I'm in mid-50's, when I don't get enough sleep, I'm more depressed & lonely & wanting attention than normal. It's the same way with children.

What really helps me is taking Brewer's yeast ... I buy the cheapest type, NOW brand, sold for $10 per lb. (giant bottle) at the Health Food Store. Lots athletics & marathon runners use Brewer's yeast for endurance. WebMD had an excellent report on Brewer's Yeast: decrease colds, boost immunity, rich in all vitamins, and help with fatigue, plus HELP WITH SLEEP.

It's safe for children, since it's classified as a food-by-product, rich in vitamins. I give a tiny amount to my 11-year old ... mix with milk & lots of honey, like a milkshake. It helps with acne in teenagers, and I give to her when she's coming down with a cold. When kid is short of sleep or proper nutrition (vitamins), they can act up. Brewer's yeast is rich in B-vitamins, have a calming effect ...

The other supplement that's safe for children is fish-oil. In an experiment with Omega-3 in fish-oil, prisoners were given high Omega-3 versus high Omega-6. The prisoners fed with fish oil were much calmer & more well-behaved than the ones on junk food. Fish oil helps with deep sleep. Sleeping well and eating nutritious food is the key to happiness & good behavior. Popi is right !!

Also mothers who took fish oil during pregnancy give birth to higher-IQ children. My Mom had 13 children ... lots of doctors & lawyers & Ph.D's in my family ... they were born in the years that she had most access to seafood. I didn't read the report on children's IQ and Omega-3 intake during pregnancy ... so I didn't take fish oil when I was pregnant, but I had severe craving for salmon, and had salmon every day. My kid now is in the gifted program in middle-school ... so my craving for salmon was a blessing.

Canned Sardines like Brunswick in Basil & Tomato sauce is cheap & least stinky, only $1.29 and richest in Omega-3, plus lowest in mercury (safe for children & pregnant women). My kid had a 2nd grade teacher who is beloved by the entire school. That teacher is slim, smart, energetic, full of love and happiness ... she has a canned sardine everyday for lunch. I started eating sardines and notice that I sleep better.

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