beaner,
i'm glad i'm not the only one who would worry the whole time! cause i've been worrying about it already.

thanxs again!!!!

I agree with all posters here to a degree. It IS normal to be anxious when your new baby is being cared for by someone else.

While I think it is important that you and hubby get some alone time, it can wait a while. Your child will eventually need to be cared for by someone else but she is still a newborn and it can wait a while. It is not healthy for you or her for you to be the only caregiver she ever has. However, it can wait until she is a little older. I think taking your mother WITH you is a great idea.

Mommabear

~Leslie~

That being said, I also wanted to add to what Andrea said: Just picture how hard it will be to leave her w/ a babysitter when she's older and refuses to be held by anyone but you?

My nephew is almost 1 year old and he has some serious attachment problems. If mom leaves the room, he looks for her, tries to follow, and then cries. If she takes a shower etc anywhere for any SHORT period of time he can't handle it. If she leaves for an errand, he will cry himself out, then fall asleep. When she is in the room, he is either touching her leg/arm or staring at her. It's great that he has bonded so closely to her, but it's to the point of being ridiculous! And it causes problems in their daily life. I just wanted you to be aware of what can/could happen.

Oh, and about her holding her breath~nothing will happen to her. I have heard that when kids do that the worst that happens is they pass out but it's not like they won't start breathing again. It's kind of a test. Kids start testing you sooner than you would think sometimes.

Good luck to you. The good part is that March is still a while away. At least your preparing early.

~Leslie~

Sounds as if you've gotten a good solution here: taking your mother with you to the conference. At three months, you and your baby girl will still be such a bonded breastfeeding pair that it sounds as if you'll both be unhappy without each other. Why put yourselves through unnecessary unhappiness? Three months is still so young. And your mother gets to enjoy the trip, too!

I don't think it's neurotic in the least for a mother to want to keep her small baby close. Human mothers have both biological and cultural urges to keep those babies close. Those urges have allowed our species to survive. Babies have a corresponding need to be close to the person who has the greatest "investment" in them.

Michie's comment that she took her little one to conferences is also something to think about. I certainly found my babies portable and not at all disruptive to others when they were little breastfeeders.

Shyness is, to some degree, an inherited part of our temperaments. But knowing that she can rely on you is more likely to make your little girl self-confident and ready to meet others.

It's been my personal experience that keeping your little ones close does not make them clingy. My older daughter and I were never apart for the first six months of her life, and when I began working part-time when she was seven months old, she transitioned easily to daycare. My younger daughter and I were similarly close. Both the girls were extremely outgoing as children, and as teenagers, both of them travelled in Europe or did exchange programs in other countries and are now self-confident young women.

Trust your instincts on this.

Best,
Elizabeth

Trish