Are you a stay-at-home mom? Yes If so, a) what age was your child(ren) when you began to stay home with them? since birth. I graduated nsg school 6 days before she was born but I've never put it to use YET why do you chose to stay home with your children? I find being at home keeps me very busy & fulfilled. I've never understood SAHM who claim they are bored. I have 1 daughter, 3 dogs, a home & my husband's business I do much of the work for plus I made sure to start involving myself & my daughter in school & plenty of activities. Gosh if I never have to work I would be so happy BUT chances are that when the last of my kids is in fulltme school I'll at last work part-time. are you financially secure enough to be home and not work? Like everyone else we could always use the extra $. We don't have a retirement a/c set up, we have to buy our own very expensive health ins., we havn't been on a great vacation in several yrs, we no longer go to fancy dinners, our home could use allot more remodeling, our cars are old but in good condition & paid for & I am always comparison shopping BUT we have no debt despite every month praising when we've paid the last bills. Our daughter is in private school & already takes 4 sets of lessons at age 3 & when we have our day trips or do happen to go out we truly go all out & enjoy, plus since I have no family help at all I have been lucky enough to be able to pay for a mothers helper or sitter for those times I need to catch up on the home, errands or the business paperwork or go to my many medical appts (I was diagnosed with MS a yr ago). All in all I'm happy, but my husband is self employed & he'd like to make a switch right now & he can't b/c we don't have enough $ in the bank nor another income. I had a stay at home Mom when I grew up & feel there is nothing better. I think that while kids are young I prefer being aorund for safety & to be involved in all the firsts, then they start activities & who else is going to chaperone them everywhere & then later on I want to be around so they have support & hopefully I can prevent them from making some bad choices that they might make had they not had any parent at home during the day after school. what are the ages and gender of your kids? daughter age 3 & working on #2 Michie

I completely understand your jealousy with bm now being involved and the kids acting like bm was never gone. My skids bm has been in and out of their lives for years and each time she called or saw them they acted like she was so wonderful and was mom of the year. Nevermind that it would be months till the next call....or that her boyfriend would be drunk the whole time the kids were there...or that bm would just sit them in front of the tv all day and the kids heard "noises" coming from bm's room during the day when the door was closed (afternoon quickie perhaps??). Anyways it would upset me so much down deep to hear them say anything good about her because all I could think about was the bad!! And how much time and energy I was putting forth to do the motherly things she did not do. It just about killed me for her to get any credit! There is no easy was to deal with those feelings. You just have to let them go somehow. Realize that the kids love you both. And she gets it easier because she is the bm....she has their unconditional love. And they will put the absent parent on a pedestal and hang on every good thing that parent does. But when they are grown they will have so many more memories with you and remember all the things you did for them. When they have their own kids they will remember talks you had with them and things you did. As for her babying them, well you can't change it. Just keep on with your normal routines at home and they will soon see that they can do XYZ at their moms house and they have to do XYZ when they are at home. But look at the bright side. They are getting to see their sober mom and have a relationship with her, which is better for them in the long run that having her absent and them blaming themselves for it. And if she spends the whole day playing with them be greatful....she could be spending the whole day sleeping and letting them do god knows what! OR she could be having boyfriends over all day.

I want to clarify what happened. My husband and SD's mom had agreed on a joint party. He told her to go ahead and book it. She called back and told him the price $300 for the package she wanted. She told us how many kids & how much time that included. I then went to the bowling alley's website and saw the package that she told us she was getting was $180. Then she admitted it was 180 and they agreed to split it 100/80. After that, she wanted to add a banner for $20 and when he agreed to that, she called back and wanted to add another lane for $60. that he didn't think was needed. She then told him that she was only paying for $80 and he had to pay the rest. That's when he said enough. She was already pissed that she didn't get away with getting him to hand over $300 cash because in the past, he let her make the arrangements and trusted that she was being fair and just gave her however much money she requested. They had a huge fight on her birthday (because Mom had gone into his job to demand money for a costume that had nothing to do with the party & she said she was only paying for HER guests) Her actual birthday party was a couple of days later and we all attended and were civil to each other. In the end, we split the cost of the party there at the bowling alley. She tried to get us to pay the whole thing on our credit card and she offered to "write us a check" for her half. We didn't go for that. (and for anyone that thinks I didn't want to pay for my step daughter's anything, that's very wrong. I buy her school clothes, counseling, girl scouts, doctor & medicine, school lunches, etc. We don't get a penny of support from her mom who hasn't held a steady job in 12 years and lives on the child/spousal support her first victim pays) Just from her history, he broke up with her after she took his credit card from his wallet and charged $2000 in Mary Kay products without his permission. They were never married and she told him she was on birth control, but as soon as she got pregnant, she was telling his family that they were getting married (he never asked her). In her first marriage's divorce papers, her first husband said the same thing, she told him she was on birth control but still ended up pregnant... only he married her & divorced her a year later.

I can be a hot head......ok ladies, you may pick yourselves up off of the floor and stop laughing now!!!! I would have been upset too. Like you said, it is hard enough to get off of work as it is. Plus this time of year is soooooo stressful even if you just stick to the Christmas stuff let alone the rest of the crap that the world throws at you. Did any of the other parents tape the program???..... May I share my little meltdown with you??? In August I had a root canal. Now mind you I have lived with A LOT of pain in my life but this was hideous! I did not get pain meds until the day after and it was hydrocodone....which makes me sick. This was all the dentist would give me so I took them as long as my body would allow and when I started vomiting I quit taking them. For months I have suffered. Monday I went in with all of us thinking that I would have to have it redone only to find that the tooth next to it had a large crack in it and so I had a crown done. No payment plan so I end up paying $360.00 that I hadn't planned on. That ticks my off. By the time I get home and my mouth is no longer numb, I am in extreem pain. I think the nerves in my mouth are probably in shock after all of this time and they are on fire. My DH calls the dentist, dentist calls in the meds, DH picks them up and guess what????? The same damn meds that make me vomit. I decided since it is evening now that I will take one and call my doctor in the morning and get a refill of my darvocet that I have for when my sciatic nerve is at it's worst. I have been very careful not to abuse my meds. I think I've taken 6 or so in the last year. Long story short. Pharmacy calls dr.'s office to alert them that I just got a prescription for hydrocone and now I want darvocet. Dr.'s office won't give me darvocet now and dentist won't give me anything else. All of discussion taking place in front of customers at drug store. When I get home I call the dentist and the dr. and chew out the assistants. Who are speaking for their bosses. Still no meds. To bad the dentist had just sent me an survey to fill out on line. I wouldn't take calls from either office the next day and cancelled my appointment for my diabetes check for today. I'm just still pissed. I am doing Advil round the clock to kept the pain bearable. I am looking for a new dentist and I'm going to take the pills into the dr's office and give the 11 out of 12 to him and tell him that I don't appreciate being treated like an addict. I even offered to take the pills into the pharmacy and give them back so that I could get some thing that helped me. What the h3ll!!!!!! STRESSSSSSSSSSS! and then it's Christmas and my DD is still being stalked, I'm in pain, DH is sick, SD10 is a pain in the butt because she is so excited about Chrstmas and there are so many things going on at school, DS is stressing about finals but working so hard since I have had to play bad cop with him and now he is my buddy along with my little black dog. Other than that the rest of world can just suck eggs. SD30 had to have her dog put down and now I feel bad about being upset with her...found a sympathy card to send to her for her little doggie. I'm with you mom1stm2.....If I still drank I'm sure I'd feel better.