For only children & parents of only childen. (kinda long).
TaraWafer
22 years ago
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trekaren
22 years agolast modified: 9 years agoRelated Discussions
Birth order of Children (kinda long but good)
Comments (3)Three boys for me... all of it true! If only I knew now what I knew before #1, I could have saved so much money and time... Such is life......See MoreSeveral Questions & other random stuff (kinda long)
Comments (13)I think a lot of jar manufacturers changed the threading on their jars to keep people from using them for canning. Maybe liability issues? I have lots of old Classico jars and don't use them in the pressure canner, but do a lot of my HWB canning in them. I love them, but they have a smaller capacity than the standard quart jars. And that's perfectly fine for some things I don't really need a full quart for. I use lemon juice for tomatoes as well. Am satisfied with the taste. If it tastes too sour, you may add sugar safely. It masks the acidity, but supposedly does not affect the acidity of the product at all. I have never been one for electric kitchen gadgets, but the rationale behind the vacuum sealing for freezer products is very valid. If you are using zip lock bags for irregularly shaped products like breads, where you cannot get the bag to fit them without air space, there is no reason you cannot wrap the product in plastic wrap first and then bag them. Freezer burn is such a wasteful thing....See MoreIs it too early to be worrying about this?(kinda long)
Comments (9)I do know someone who has never been forced or even pressured but really was let to come at the skill at their own pace (teaching, support, and opportunity were freely available and occurring). Basically, that child became really consistent and 100% 'trained' overnight when they started school. In general it's easier for a parent (or older person) to 'force' or pressure younger children. Once children can express preferences, and agreement or disagreement and have a kind of logical understanding 'force' can be counterproductive. Children who are at your daughter's age will need to explore their new imposed situation (this whole potty thing). From the adult perspective you're waiting to see what happens, and making sure to ask her if she has to go and probably being consistent with whatever the routine is. From her perspective, she has this whole new thing to worry about but she learns that when she says she has to go, then she sits on the seat (and you give her any help probably, and encouragement). She may not yet have connected her urination with 'having to go' though. That can take some time, and learning. That's where you can exert some influence usually if you want by making her experience on the seat end differently when she does go (adding a reward of some kind), but keeping the general routine as predictable as possible even when she doesn't actually 'go.' It's easy for an adult to be automatic about what the different urges feel like, and what to do when they occur. Children have to learn and become familiar with where to go and what to do. This whole flushing thing, and whoah what weird seats, and there is special language and phrases to be used. If she's getting used to the idea of the place and the sitting and the special seat, but not actually 'going' or seeming to have connected all the dots quite yet, then try to grant her (and you) that she is in fact learning. Also, the repetition of the rituals is important to reinforce for her that she knows and can know what will happen (and that things are predictable for her). probably, social pressure and wanting to do well in school would have her up to speed instantly if she had seemed slow in this area; but, as it is she's probably still becoming acquainted with the basics in a meaningful way even though she's not quite trained yet...See MoreMonster In Law 2 (not really SF related, but kinda) LONG though
Comments (20)that's one way to look at it. It sounds worse the way you describe it... He/we borrowed money to pay off credit cards... which consolidated everything to one lower payment a month so then he figured he could afford a motorcycle payment. After I said we can't afford it, he got together with his parents & they discussed how it would save money on gas and all the pluses... he could get to work & home faster. Then his parents made me feel like a heel for wanting to deprive their son of having his own motorcycle... after all, he works so hard. His brother has one & soon after DH got his, FIL bought one... they said to go riding together, which hasn't happened yet. He justifies it because he works 40+ hours at his job, works at our business on his days off & in the evening, maintains the 6 acres during Spring & Summer. He does work hard, but I disagreed, his parents butted in (with his invitation of course) so when they complain he hasn't made his payment (on the debt consolidation), I ignore it or tell them how much he loves riding his bike... when it's not raining or cold. He doesn't miss the motorcycle payment though. No, it doesn't escape me that he is willing to buy what he wants & tell his daughter we can't afford it when she WANTS something. He does pay for the health insurance but I pay all the co-pays and other things because he puts his entire check toward the bills, including paying his parents back for the debt consolidation loan... and it was mostly HIS pre-me debt. He did sell his truck because it was only driven a few times a year & we wanted to get rid of that payment when the economy tanked. If she needs something, he will make sure she gets it. But, he'll take it out of our bill paying account & then tell me he needs me to cover some of the bills that he usually covers. It still comes out of my pocket... but it is really OUR pocket. I buy those things because it was what I did as a mother for my own kids... he thinks some of it is unnecessary ~ the extra's like school pictures, yearbooks & fundraisers, not the health care. He also doesn't like shopping & doesn't have patience... he used to go into the store knowing her current size & buy a few cheap outfits at a department store... sometimes the SAME outfit in different colors. That was when she was 5-6. She's now 11 & he would do the same.. he took her shopping for school clothes & dragged me along. It was a nightmare for me because he is so impatient & they argued over what she could get. (wanting low rise skinny jeans) plus she was upset that nothing fit her. Then he about had a heart attack at the register... until I told him that the last time I took her shopping, it was at least twice that much. AS for the update on MIL: We went to dinner at the restaurant last night & left baby at home with my DD. MIL sat furthest away from her parents (across from me) & SD between us at the end of the table. She interrogated... er, conversed with SD about life at our house & life at her mother's house.... anything to avoid her own parents, who seemed miserable. Then, MIL had planned us to come to her house tomorrow evening but I had plans so she moved it up to tonight. DH went straight from work. I took SD & my DS stayed at my house with the baby. By the time I got there, they actually had tried to cancel the whole thing... DH was upset that I didn't bring the baby because THEY WANT TO SEE THE BABY! So, I asked him WHO is making such a big deal about the baby being there? HIS MOM of course. I told him that first of all, the baby is not really related to anyone... he's a step-great great grandson at best. I doubt they really want to spend the night fawning over him as much as MIL wanted to see if I let SD play with him at HER house. Secondly, he wants the attention of the room. When people are talking, he tries to get in on it & gets noisy. I asked hi do we really want the evening to be about DGS or DH's grandparents & Aunt? So, since SD is having trouble in school (all F's & D's), I had her bring her homework. She took it out & MIL spent the entire time (along with MIL's sister) helping SD with her homework... focusing the entire evening on SD. I think that's the way it should be... SD is their granddaughter & SHE is the one that needs attention & help, not DGS ~ who would have demanded the attention & SD would have been ignored. MIL hardly said two words to me.. trying to remain pleasant for show but she was probably pissed at me. Oh well, I told DH that after what MIL did at the luau & the way she has been on me about SD playing with the baby, I am not putting the baby in the middle of that mess. He was sleeping at home anyways....See Moredarkeyedgirl
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