Would only like to add that the tank of course will be in your care, lol. (I have an extensive background and too many links so you can email me at sherryazure@yahoo.com if desired) but mainly read up on cycling and maturing a tank before the fish are added. FYI: It is always better to buy a heater for a small tank UNDER watted as they can and do break, overheat. 50 is way to much for a six gallon and 25 would have been perfect (never trust sales people). If it is a great quality should be ok just have it at slightly under where you want temp. (I have dozens of tanks and many therms and all read differently!) Sorry but one should NEVER carry a tank with water in it.. stress not only for tank but for fish. Not a toy and the spot should be chosen for security (ie won't be run into, knocked over, and level table (never near heater or window, but indirect light ok). While small they do stress and break. RE going back and forth, slow down lol, (this post is old but still responding for future readers) plan and do it one step at a time. Do not add fish until all is done and tank has set a bit and matured. Plants are like fish, they need chlorinated water and heat unless cold water plants which those are not, and none live in freezing temps (the cell walls will break down). See below on amount of sand, really not needed unless you have rooted plants which are not always good for beginners (again need to know requirements of, light requirements, fertilizers so on)... get some bunch like anacharis, float them or leave some with weights on... and research plants for later as your knowledge and experience grow. Sand becomes nasty if there are not strong root growth to uptake the poo (and other stuff).. it becomes a breeding ground for "negative" bacteria is too deep and gravel vacuuming not done. a fine layer is perfect for growing good bugs which keep the water cycled. .......................... Then depending on the size (your original size is indeed too small for any amount of any sized goldfish)six is great) of your aquarium you select your fish and that will also affect the type of filtration, heater and water qualities ph, hardness so on. Example: You would not want a betta in a set up with the filtration as mentioned in above posts - the fins would eventually get shredded. A small box filter with valves set on low would be more adequate. Lots of plants as they love to sit on them, hide under then so on (one betta per tank). Cooler temp, small school of fish such as white cloud mountain minnow would be perfect for that size. (they come from Chinese mountain streams.) I would do species only for such a small tank and beginner to boot. White clouds are great beginner fish and there are other small schooling fish but you have to be careful as that tank is too small for more then say 6 really small fish. Priscella tetra is another good choice for beginners. (that was before I read the last post) with six gallon you can add a few more fish, some bottom catfish such as cory catfish which also like to school. See, what fish you plan to get informs you as to your tank set up (after you read up on which are good for beginners) and again sales people (at least hear in NYC) can sale you things that grow huge, or say goldfish with tropical so it is up to you do do resaerch. ........................................... I would also consider plants such as Anubias which are low light easy to care for if they can be found. If not even the beginner Anacharis (not sure how to spell) and other easy to care for beginner plants will help greatly with water quality, security of fish (they hate bare tanks with lights a glare (instinct is to be secure from being eaten) and be careful of being sold land plants as aquarium. Sand is not really needed for bunch plants (Anubias have rizomes and it is never to be planted) but a 1/3 inch layer will help to cultivate the "bugs" bio bacteria which is part of a mature cycled tank and the sand will allow a culture there as well. With no experience in cycling the beginner reason for dead fish is that reason. Adding too many fish in an uncylcled tank. (over feeding, wrong maintenance so on). If you can get filter floss from an (healthy) established tank that will help greatly (put a bit in your filter). Add a few fish after a week or so with plants so on maturing a bit. This gives the "bugs ie organisms) time to establish. The plants will help as well. (Look up ammonia poisoning in fish as it is a really painful way to go, burns the delicate gills.) When you add the fish, do so slowly... any ph difference of a small increment can cause shock and death (as well as temperature change of a small increment)... (There are a great many good beginner books on this, most of mine are from the 50's on up, lol and still serve me well without all the high tech stuff). I lower the lights to avoid stress, put new fish (I always get tons more water from the store) in quarantine tank with filter, heater, towel over end so low light (they are super stressed from bagging (I bag my own and never dump them in - scoop) and transport and stress results in lower immunity and disease)... I put lid on tank (or grid) and slowly with small airline tubing with knot in it trickle new water into the quarantine. Just a little for first day (again depends on ph of your water and stores)...slowly take out some and dribble in new and over time they will be acclimated and you can also watch for disease outbreak. Soft silk plants will greatly add to there comfort. A bare tank is a huge stress for fish. Well there is much more, feeding (eyes are usually size of stomach and do not overfeed) a few flakes (rotate with frozen or live, can learn about this later) twice a day. (smaller faster fish smaller more frequent feeding a few flakes each - that's it). they will nibble on bugs that grow on plants as well (algaes as well) to supplement diet. Again, as a child I went to the library and read for months and set up tank and waited for it to mature before even considering adding fish. This is the number one reason for fish dying or getting sick. And as your child grows older this is a great tool for educational purposes. Good luck and be careful of getting hooked! (it is a habit that can last a lifetime, lol) Best Sherry

It is so hard at that age. When they get older, they know it's coming, too, and can get to the toilet. But toddlers/preschoolers, it just spews wherever they are! They don't understand, they just see/feel their body doing something very scary and painful. It's hard. Poor Grant! I'm glad he got his rest and is getting back to himself. The worst night I had was when #4 was about 18 mos, which made the others 3, 6, and 9 at the time. About 4am one of them woke up sick, threw up, about the time I had that one settled back down in clean sheets the next one woke up and threw up. And it continued until all 4 of them had thrown up 3-4 times. It was just constant well into the next afternoon. At first I thought I must have fed them all something bad and went through the kitchen trying to consider the possible problem, but some friends reported the same bug with their kids and DH and I avoided it. Oh, the laundry! Every blanket, sheet, pillowcase, and big beach towel in the house was a mess. I think I avoided that one somehow. A little girl on DD's gymnastic's team was sick (nauseous, didn't throw up yet) this weekend at while at the gym. Her mom warmed up Sprite in the microwave for the girl to sip before she took her home. She said it works for her kids every time.

gibby3000: "I sound like an "old" person talking about how we walked five miles to school in a blizzard...." - and uphill both ways, as my dad used to say. It might have something to do with the way our parents were raised, at least mine. My parents were born in 1929, the beginning of the depression and then were 16 when WW II ended. Times were tough and so many kids had to work to help support the family. They probably expected their own children (us) to do the same. They expected their own children to get out and make their own way. There is an adage (how true it is I don;t know) that one parents differently than they were parented. My parents gave me 6 months from university grad to get out of the house and basically to never bother them again. When grandkids started to come along they moved out of the city so they couldn't be babysitters. As an adult I do not have a close relationship with my parents. As an aside - Schooling is more expensive, at least here it is. Tuition and books have gone up by more than 10X since I was in university but minimum wages have definitely not gone up to keep pace and have only gone up 5X as much, grants are not as readily available for financial assistance. I just can't treat my kids the way I was treated. For me, it isn't a matter of spoiling them or not letting them grow up, it's more a matter of showing them that families are a life long family unit and commitment. It's showing them that our lives are forever intertwined, not in a stifling overbearing way, but in a supportive way. I was not raised this way. That is to say that the way I was raised wasn't wrong but it isn't the way that I will raise my children. Slightly OT - I've already told my 2 sons that when their dad and I die that they are, along with future wives and kids (if that happens) each others families. When I mentioned that to them, it was at a time when they weren't getting along very well, they looked at each other quite surprised. Since then, I have seen a change in them in that they accept each others differences but at the same time have each others back and have begun to like each other.

Gosh, I don't know WHAT happened, but I lost my cool-calm-and-collected mindset overnight somehow, and missed my son so much today that I was on the verge of tears many times. Didn't say a word to anyone, so DH, DD and her friend who is with us for a few weeks were not really privvy to my feelings, also because we were all kind of in and out all day anyway. And then lo and behold, after dinner, my daughter excused herself to go get something 'she had made' to show me. Ten minutes later, I hear my son's voice calling me! Forgetting all logic, I responded, "Ohmygosh! Where are you? Where are you?" She had SKYPED him on the laptop, and then positioned the laptop to just outside the kitchen door. We had the most wonderful chat with him. It was so much more than great to SEE him! Poor guy got to see the remnants of our dinner, which included a particularly lovely looking pasta dish with fresh spinach, goat cheese, etc., and a mixed berry pie. Almost wistfully he said, "Aww, that looks so good..." DH and I both agreed he seems to have suddenly matured overnight... going to bed with a happy heart tonight.... both because I got to see my son and because DD and her friend surprised me in this wonderful way...