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dirtboysdad

SIL isolating daughter

dirtboysdad
18 years ago

Has anyone had any experience with a SIL who is trying to isolate his wife, your daughter, from her family? How did you handle it, especially if your daughter was in denial? Did you just back off and hope she would come to her senses or did you try to intervene?

The SIL blames members of his wife's family for his problems and hurting his feelings, and by way of "punishment" tells those family members (his wife's mother [my ex-wife]and his wife's brother & SIL) they cannot see the grandchildren/nieces. Allegedly, if they apologize to SIL or taken a certain action that he demands they take, then they will be able to see the wee ones again. Daughter seemingly approves of this behavior, but we wonder if it's only to protect herself.

(Daughter is SIL's second wife. They have two children and daugther has raised SIL's two children from the time they were toddlers as he has custody of them from his first marriage. ALSO, there is concern, which daughter does not deny, that SIL has sexual identity issues.)

My brother, a psychologist, say he is trying to isolate my daughter from her mother and brother in order to control her.

My brother has told my daughter this but she denies that is happening and now refuses to speak to her uncle, who lives in a different state.

In order to try to keep contact with my daughter and the grandchildren, my current wife and I are keeping quiet - although we, too, believe SIL is trying to isolate his wife.

We would like to speak to my daughter as we know her mother and brother and his wife are missing the children a great deal, especially now that the holidays are here, but have been told not to because SIL would use that opportunity to cut his wife off from us also.

If you've experienced something like this, did it resolve positively and how long did it take?

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