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My son left

Posted by kimmiegirl (My Page) on
Sat, Nov 12, 11 at 0:37

My son was married in July of 2010. He is 31 years and hi bride is 21. All was going well until my son called one day and said that he and his wife were fighting and it was because of me. Apparently she is under the impression that I said something that dissed her mother. I did not. From that day forward I have been cussed out, told I wasn't what my son wanted in a mother and flat out ignored. Mothers day came and they ignored me. Fathers day came and they brought my husband a present and spent time with him. They told us they wanted just a friendly relationship with them. They recently moved 7 miles from our house but have only seen us once in 3 months. They recently left the area and moved to where her mother lives. They did not tell us goodbye nor have they called. I guess it is all my fault! What should I do next?

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: My son left

There must be more to this story,your son surely wouldnt ignore you for no reason,why wait for your son to see you?go to see him .If that were my son I would be up there in a flash to see what the matter was

RE: My son left

I think that whatever you said must have been out of order or misunderstood! If you want to continue a relationship with your son and future grandchildren, you should try to put aside your personal feelings/impression of your son's wife and her mother! Perhaps she does not have the maturity and experience of someone like yourself to not take your remarks as criticism.
If it were me, I would apologise to all three of them and try to make it up to them. I would certainly show my daughter in law that she's always welcome in my home, after all she loves your son and he loves her, chose her for his wife, to be mother of his children. Your son will love you for this!

RE: My son left

Perhaps the poster who said my dil is not mature enough has it right. What I said about her mother was this "I told my mother that my dil and her mother got in a fight and that my dil slapped her mother" My DIL said I dissed her mother because she would never slap her mother because her mother was a good mother. That was the diss! Believe it or not! Now neither of them are in mine or my husbands lives! I tried to be the loving mil to no avail. Did 99% of everything for their wedding, tried to make her feel welcome and then I got this...snubbed on Mothers Day, a cussing out and more snubbing, but my husband got a beautiful fathers day card and a nice present! Go figure huh

RE: My son left

Why are you spreading gossip about your DIL to your mother?

I'd put distance between myself and you too if you were spreading nasty rumors about me slapping my mother. Once you said something like that, you'd get to know nothing about my life.

You were in the wrong. Admit it and apologize and change your ways. Learn boundaries, self control, and respect--and you won't have problems like these.

RE: My son left

There must be more to it. Perhaps you have indulged in this behavior before.

Don't be petty, rise above the petty behavior.

Say you are sorry so you can be a happy family again.

Look at the big picture.

What is important to you ?

RE: My son left

It isn't clear, to me anyway, whether it was just 'gossip' about dil slapping her mom, or whether dil actually did slap her mom, or whether dil made up the story that OP even said it.

When someone, maybe from jealousy, maybe to gain control of spouse, decides to drive a wedge between his/her spouse & the spouse's mother or father or siblings, truth is the first thing that goes out the window.

kimmie, I wish you the best.

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