Hello pinkpeonies (love your name btw)

It is difficult to fit in with in laws sometimes isn't it. Especially when the place that you are trying to fit into keeps being changed.

I have a couple of suggestions....I know that you want your in laws to have a good relationship with your child and you want your child to have a good relationship with them. I would offer the opportunity for that whenever possible but I would draw the line at when I was feeling pushed or pulled outside of my comfort zone. To be willing to indulge your MIL's changing attitude seems like something you are going to have to do if you want to maintain a presence in the family and not feel left out. But...and this is my other suggestion....it is your husband's mother and I feel that a great deal of the relationship that you guys have with his side of the family should be his responsibility. If he is ok with not being too involved with them then maybe you should try to accept that and see it as a mixed blessing. Someone that runs hot and cold or chooses favorites (as it seems your MIL may do) can be very stressful and something that I would try to minimize in my own life.

You can try and develop an independent relationship with your SIL and the new baby outside of your relationship with MIL. That way the little cousins can be close and it doesn't center around a grandmother that may or may not like to play favorites.

I would try to find the best in whatever situation that your in laws throw at you and do so with a smile on your face and try not to be hurt. I doubt if it is a personal thing towards you but rather a character flaw of theirs. There again...if your DH doesn't care then try to roll with the punches. I know that moms seem to care more about these things than the dads do but like I said...it's his mom and dad. Don't stress yourself out about it so much my dear or every Holiday is going to be something you dread and for your little families sake it shouldn't be that way. Best of luck to you and roll with the bunches if you can.