Sorry to hear your problem. My story is too long to post here but I will try to put it as best as I can. Eight years ago Maddie,first grandchild was born. Daughter was a nurse..he was a fireman. I started keeping Maddie throughout the week without pay..I did the laundry,cleaned the house,cooked and cared for her..worked part time at JC Penneys nights and weekends. I would stay all day and then leave for work about 4 pm and worked until 9 at night. Years progressed...they moved not far from my house..I kept eventually all 3 children and worked retail. This involved nearly 100 miles of travel daily to take oldest to preschool and pick her up as it was in town near where I live and farther from my daughter's home. I had to quit at Penneys...my daughter and son-in-law(who is a jerk) said they would pay me whatever Penneys was paying me and never leave me hanging without a job. I don't want to even go in to how this all turned out. This was a year ago and they of course got hard up for money..he's now working a good job though that his union daddy got him because he ended up being a lousy school teacher and quit his job doing that before his 2nd child was born and was out of work for over a year. Anyway..months went by and they didnt pay me a cent..never even mentioned it. Because I love those children like my own I went everyday and never said a word..neither did my husband who has been more than generous over the years to allow me to do this. It finally was brought up by me..just before school began last year...my daughter just said."Yeah..you'll have to find another job." I left her house with that said and my life has been miserable ever since. At 57 and even having a college degree and experience and knowing people in this town..I cannot find a full time job. I cannot tell you what life is like now...I stay depressed but move on as well as I can. I even kept a little baby whose mom is a teacher and lives nearly right next door to my daughter so the smaller 2 kids could visit me there daily if they wanted to. This young woman treated me like a queen. I drove there every day and she paid me $120 a week for the one child. I did a little laundry and cleaning but mostly she was just so sweet and kind to me. One day she even sent me flowers with an expression of her love and appreciation for my caring for her child. It was indeed new to me. I didn't do it this year...it became complicated and she began to depend on me all the time as far as calling me with her problems and such..I felt I'd become her mother and it was just tough. She begged me to keep her child this year and even upped the pay. She even offered to pay me all summer when she wouldn't need me so I would come back in the Fall. I needed to escape..sadly..I do love her too but I need full time work.She is hurt now and it is a sorry situation. I've seen a lot of the grandkids this summer. When I quit keeping them it was horrible. The 2nd youngest cried and cried..the oldest wouldn't come here to my house in hopes that if she didn't I would come back. My daughter and son-in-law are lazy...they don't want to work days when they can. They could have kept me if his mother hadn't been so busy paying their bills. Anyway...I feel deeply for what you are going through. I cherish each moment with those children and they are most precious to us. Last Christmas for the first time we got a credit care(as I was out of work) and put Christmas on it. My daughter just a week before the holiday was taking stuff back she'd bought the oldest child. I went out and re-purchased the stuff as I felt so bad for the child. I took it out there and gave it to them to give her from Santa and got a tongue lashing that I'd out done them..it was horrible. She told me to get out of her house and showed me the door. She then said I could come Christmas or not she didn't care she would never apologize. I went of course as the kids would never have understood. I've been abused more than I can say..but what we do for love is most important in the end. I still can't find a job...our checking account bounced this week because they couldn't pay their water bill so we paid it...the kid's had no water. I can tell you that my health has suffered through these years. I know as they grow older I won't see them as much...I have my memories however and they are the sweetest children. My son has a new baby and they have great jobs and are sending her to daycare. She was premature and they are worried about her but they don't seem to want me. It's heartbreaking but I guess I understand. Keeping the grandkids can be tricky..you are a intricate part of everything that goes on. Let them know daily you love them..call them every day and tell them. Plan some outings on weekends that won't wear you out...mine love museums and parks and things like that. I always cook a meal and let them help out..they love that. The main thing is...tell them daily you love them....keep that contact and the doors open no matter how you feel...they won't ever forget it..believe me. I'm up against other grandparents who are wealthy..have campers and huge homes on the river...all I can give them is my time and my love. We did buy a set-up pool and it was a great buy..they love it. It's a lot of fun and they can stay in it all day..not too much trouble to watch either. If you can afford it it's great to take them to concerts...symphonies...ballets around your area..culture is something everyone can enjoy. Even if it's building a bird house..planting a small garden they can enjoy. You don't have to do strenuous things...kids love being listened to...telling you about their day...walking in the sunshine. Never believe that you will lose them...love is what kids need. Today they need their grandparents more than ever. Their parents are so busy...they need you in ways you can't imagine. Mine love the latest Hannah Montana videos...get some hip music for your car that they like...dress-up clothes are a favorite too. I bought them a butterfly set-up online where they could watch them hatch and then let them go...they loved it!!! Check out what is new with their age groups and then get involved with it. Another thing..if you have a soup kitchen nearby..take them and let them help others...it's a lesson they carry for life! I hope this helps friend...I will pray for you. There is no pain like this...I know...I just try to focus on what is best for the kids. It is, as I say, risky business when grandparents immerse themselves in their children's lives..some go great...others get hurt..in the end..the love returned and hugs and appreciation the little ones give us is after all...the joy of life.God bless!! :)))

missmack, I would think the 16-21 yr. olds should be more than be able to take care of themselves for a couple weeks. Sounds like the parents don't have a lot of trust in their kids. Are they big troublemakers--which may figure into your fee. Wow--a 21 yr old having a babysitter! I would charge the typical babysitting rates in your area. Of course, not sure how to calculate your sleeping time. But, I bet it's putting you out a bit not getting to wake up and get ready at home. Maybe $25 a day/night? bbjan, The $8 sounds reasonable to me, but I don't know about California rates - You may be able to get more. And, I guess it mainly depends on supply and demand for both of you. Could you find other people to sit for and charge more for...Could she get others to drive and babysit for the same amount? How much does the school's aftercare cost?

WOW! I'm suprised at these posts....I used to get paid $45 a day for watching one 4 month old...that was for 10-12 hours a day. I thought this was average in California. But minimum wage is $8.50 an hour. I feel like if your paying your sitter $5 an hour for 2 or more kids (and they are qualified and experienced) then youre telling them you don't really appreciate them, on the otherhand if your babysitter is 16 with not much experience this is fine to me. Babysitters work hard, especially with more than one child. I wouldn't do it for less than $25 a day per child.

Hi again, all. Bestlawn, I maybe shouldn't even have mentioned the drive to and from the job, because it made it seem like I am 'charging' her for that. I realize it is MY expense, but it was mentioned only to explain that I have to factor in the cost of gas (in my private thoughts) that I'd use doing childcare outside my home, to know if the salary would be anything comparable to what I could make watching two children in my home, with no driving involved. I live in the Toronto area, and straight babysitting wages (no meal preperation, or transporting to school required) here are generally $10.00 per hour, even if you only have one child. Out of curiosity, I looked up the tuition for the Montessori school the children will be attending, and it is $18,000 per year per child, for a full day program. The mother wants to enroll her two girls, from 1:00 til 6:00 each day. I'm not sure how much she'll be paying for those hours, but that's an astounding amount of money to pay for a 3 and 4 year old, in my opinion. Anyway, today I went on the interview. Just FYI, the house is close to the million dollar range, and had a Jaguar and a Lexus in the driveway. During the interview, the mother said I'd be responsible for making the children breakfast and lunch, and driving them to the Montessori school. I thought she might ask a little about how I planned to spend time with them, wondering whether I'd take them to the park occasionally, or do crafts with them or whatever. But she didn't ask anything and just seemed concerned that they'd have a way to get dropped off at the school after lunch. I was most surprised that she never asked me anything about my driving record (spotless, but I could be unlicensed for all she knew) and said she only uses booster seats for her two kids. Her 3 year old is very petite and cannot possibly be legally heavy enough to be out of a car seat yet. So I was starting to get a really bad feeling before we even talked wages. I had decided that even if the pay was satisfactory, I'd have to insist she get a proper car seat for the youngest or I'd refuse the job. So....when she said her childcare budget was $8.00 per hour, (for feeding 2 meals to 2 children and transporting them daily to their Montessori school) that clinched the non deal! Minimum wage her is $8.75, so it became obvious that she was budgeting all her money to get her children a great start in education, but was not too concerned about safety, and cared little about how the first half of her childrens' day would go, while in my care. It definitely wasn't for me!