We seem to have a lot of threads going about the swap. I had posted this on another thread, but this seems to be the busiest one, so I'll copy it here, too: Terry: Thanks to you and the others who did the preliminary work arranging things. Kenneth (madaboutu) and I came from Gadsden and will spread the word here. He's going to do a writeup for the Etowah County Master Gardeners publication and we'll talk about it at the meetings next Spring, so maybe some more newbies will join us in the Spring. See you then! Alice

I know that the actual dates are significant, but really when you think about it, it's just a day. If you try to think about how you are grieving every single day without your loved one and how every single day that they were here with you was just as important as the next, those "dates" really aren't that important. They are just that..... "dates". The birthdays are harder for me when I can't help wonder where Christin would be in her life now had she lived. She was only 19 when she left us, and had so many hopes and dreams. I also know what you mean about grieving differently for your parent and your child. It is a totally different grief. I too, feel a little guilty sometimes because I had always dreaded my parents' deaths, but I think my heart is a little hardened since I lost my child and I just don't think that the hurt can be any deeper even though my Mom was my best friend as was my daughter. I miss them both so much. I guess my grief for the two of them just kinda meshes together. We usually just bring Christin flowers on her birthday. Our first year without her, we had a memorial service at church and before that, we had a little ceremony at her grave where about 100 of her friends came and said nice things and mentioned memories etc. We released a bunch of helium balloons and some had cards connected to them for Chris. It was very healing. We were very dissatisfied with her funeral, so this kind of made up for it. It was the day that her grave stone was put down... beautiful day. Lu

'Real' anything has good symbolic significance, and usually some practical utility as well. A piece of furniture, like a trunk or bench is also good. Most local woodworkers would be able to custom make one for you. Your choices of materials, woods, and detailing can add to (or reduce) the total costs involved to the point where a custom made piece may be as affordable (maybe more so) than some retail already made pieces. You can kind of sit in a quiet place and brain storm about the transition from 17 to 18 for yourself. You also have particular knowledge about your daughter and what you know of her ambitions and hopes, as well as her current hobbies and interests. Give yourself some time, and some space to let the best ideas just come to you. Plus, you have the benefit of being able to consult at least a little bit with the gift recipient in question.

Jayne, a beautiful quilt for your daughter, outstanding work! Love the butterflies on the border! Yes, I learned the hard way (years ago) that SID quilting by hand was not the best way. Guess we just think "well, it's just quilting after all, what could be bad?" And then, we find out..... Teresa