Hi Mindy and all on the New England Forum, Michelle runs a wonderful plant sale in Avon as part of the Cosco's work for the Children's Miracle Network and Children's Hospital in Boston. Any amount of money made for them is well appreciated and her huge donation is a tribute to her and her family and hard work she puts into this. Any and all help will be appreciated, whether it be seeds mailed to her to start, containers to sow seeds in, Spring divisions of perennials that you could donate, even if they need to be grown for the following years plant sale, seedlings that you started from seed or reseeds in your gardens and any and all extra pots that you no longer want. And of course, anyone that is able to volunteer some time in Avon at the plant sale would be well appreciated. Michelle can arrange for someone to come to your home to pick up anything that you are able to donate for the plant sale, so if you are not able to bring it down, don't feel that you can't help out. Marlene, so you had to be "dragged out of the Prouty Garden" and in Oct no less. You should see it in the spring and summer then. It's become one beautiful garden with plants growing, blooming for every season. I can remember when it was just a dream to have and how it slowly took shape and started to develop. Many, many perennials, trees and plants there are from my grandparent's farm, donated by them over the early years of the development of the garden, and spent many a day shoveling soil, compost, peat, mulch and planting that garden, It's a beautiful, peaceful place to sit and relax in, enjoy the beauty and bring a child to that is an inpatient. It is always full of staff, parents, children and in the summer, many an event is held outside in the garden for the children. Michelle, I suggest that instead of using the abbreviation CMN, you actually use the full name, Children's Miracle Network and Children's Hospital. That way people will be familiar with the organization. I haven't forgotten about those seeds, they will be on the way in the next week or 2. Fran

That is correct Graywings. Voting in the semi-finals closes on Tuesday, and you can vote once per day for the same charity until then. Each person gets a maximum of 15 votes, and there were 10 days of voting. Like I said you can vote for the same charity only once per day, so each person also has 5 'extra' votes to distribute to other charities they find worthy. I've been trading with a friend who is supporting a charity in the large category, she's getting my extra 5 and we're getting hers. There are so many worthwhile charities involved that I could easily support!

The above advice is all good. Your daughter is at an age where, if there is a perceptual or educational problem, she's got time to learn to deal with it before she gets to jr or sr. high when her workload will be much greater. Tally Sue is absolutely right in suggesting that telling her 'not' to be embarrassed is probably going to have the opposite effect. I personally would be forthright and honest and say that we're trying to find a way to make learning and studying as easy as possible for her. Now, may I address your comments about your school systems. If you feel your schools aren't providing good quality education, start making noise--let your governor, legislature, county freeholders, local officials and school board know they're falling down on the job. Get other parents and the newspapers involved in your fight. Every child should have access to a high quality, FREE education, in my opinion. Children who have (or may have) learning problems should have adequate free testing available and the public school system should be providing the appropriate help for them. High expectations, yes, but not impossible. In my state, most public school systems are academically way ahead of the private ones. The public schools all have child study teams who are qualified to identify and treat problems. If a school system doesn't have the right class for a child who needs extra help, it's their responsibility to send that child to a school that does--and the public school pays the tuition and provides transportation. If your state is doing less, you have a right to demand they improve what's offered. If our children aren't properly educated, where will we be as a country? Sorry about that--I'll step down off my soap box now.

Unfortunately the holidays bring forth reminders of family issues, interpersonal conflicts, and historical baggage. Not everyone in everyone's family gets along, not everyone does what others expect or desire, yada yada. It's too bad but for most people, such issues aren't new issues and at some point, when remediation efforts have failed, it's time to move on from letting such problems be a downer. The fault isn't always with the kids, nor always with the parents, as an example. Some of you have told stories of having had cruel or indifferent parents, others about having problems dealing with kids who seem to not allow for mutuality in relationships. Among all the situations some of you have mentioned are probably all the possible permutations. People don't get along and act nice to one another simply because they're related, you all know that. Sometimes, it's the family relationship itself that can lead to jealousies, conflicts, etc. Relationships that are built mostly on feelings of guilt or obligation, or expected to be so, are rarely successful.