Start with it all White Dove ... if after a few months, you think it's boring, paint the trim.

YOU can better pick colors when the walls, cabinets and counters are the 'real' ones.

We just built and I had a hard time with this. We did match the trim to the cabinets and I am glad that I did. Everything is uniform and it doesn't look like we missed trying to match. I agree, if you go different go different enough so you don't look like you missed. Our trim isn't pure white and sometimes that is a bit hard because I have to go darker on walls than I want to so that we have contrast. White Dove is nice and light so no worries there.

We painted the family room Ben Revere Pewter which is a bit darker than Edgecomb. Love it. It is a warm gray with some taupe but goes great with our cool off white trim.

We have charcoal counters and painted the kitchen Ben Abalone. This is a light cool gray and might be perfect for you if you find that Edgecomb is not gray enough. It doesn't read beige at all which Revere Pewter does in some light. If you want a darker cool gray try Ben Stonington Gray, very nice. If you want really light, Ben Horizon. None of these colors seem to have annoying undertones.

If you want a tiny bit of green in the gray, Ben Sweet Spring. This color is pale and reads gray with a bit of green.

Good luck!