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What should you toss but can't? (or won't)

intherain
18 years ago

Come on, we all have stuff we KNOW we should toss, but for some reason we are holding onto them. Maybe if we put it in print, we will actually do what we need to: TOSS.

So, what's hanging around your house that you should toss, but for some reason can't bring yourself to do so?

Sheryl

Comments (22)

  • bouncingpig
    18 years ago

    You mean besides DH and the kids?! Just joking! I think for me it would be things I am keeping for future yard decor (trellis's etc.) but I keep hoping we will get the yard done soon and I hate to re-purchase things like that later. But they take a lot of room in the garage. But the yard will be done in stages over quite a while, as it is very spendy (it involves lots of terracing . . . who knew dirt and rocks could be so spendy!!) But I just can't seem to bring myself to get rid of them. It seems like to do that is giving up on getting our yard done. I use them for black mail right now. Whenever DH complains about them taking up space, I (with great drama) say "well if you would ever get the yard done, it wouldn't be problem now would it?!" I know . . . very childish! But we can't be perfect all the time!

    Brenda

  • alisande
    18 years ago

    I still struggle with clothing (just mine), but this forum has given me ammunition, and I'm making headway. Sort of.

  • steve_o
    18 years ago

    High-school and college yearbooks. By the definition of what should be tossed, I haven't looked at them in years. Courtesy of moving around frequently, I don't keep in touch with anyone from high school or college. I'm not even inclined to look at them myself because I don't need to go back to that part of my life. Yet I can't quite bring myself to toss them. Maybe, though, ... I can keep just a couple (like senior years) and offer the rest through Classmates.com or such ... (idea!)

  • jiggreen
    18 years ago

    well, my new obsession is downsizing our clutter, and i'm quite proud of how much i have disposed of. but according to my mother, the old couch in my family room needed to leave the house about 6+ years ago, yet still i resist. part of it is financial reasons, part of it is decorating issues (it's taken me a year to pick out a paint color for the main areas of my house, i can't imagine picking out a new couch!), and part of it probably is nostalgia. the couch has been with me through 6 moves, the kids have jumped on it, (and off it), puked on it, dogs have slept on it, and for a long time it was almost the only piece of furniture hubby and i had. for me and that couch, parting will be such sweet sorrow. i'm working my way up to it though....i keep telling my mother that one day she will walk into my home and see a brand spanking new couch with no prior history (or personality!) sitting in my family room.

  • teacats
    18 years ago

    Way too much vintage jewelery -- which I adore -- and tidying up my drawer is my job today!!!

    (wish me luck! LOL!)

    MY DH is a true packrat -- and now sells on EBay as our family income -- so keeping MY stuff around just adds to the clutter!

  • marie26
    18 years ago

    Old T-shirts that I can still wear around the house but would never wear outside. They should all be used as rags but I'm way too slow in getting them into that pile.

  • Julie_MI_Z5
    18 years ago

    I should toss 2 desks, 1 end table, and 1 small chest of drawers... but DH won't agree to it. I'm pretty sure I can sneak out the end table in April when he's out of town?

    P.S. Teacats, I LOVE vintage jewelry!

  • mustangs81
    18 years ago

    My Mom's bible study books and tapes. I asked her church if they wanted them, they declined. I guess I feel that I would be struck down if I threw any of her religious material and knick knacks away. We were of different faiths.

  • intherain
    Original Author
    18 years ago

    Brenda - LOL on tossing the family! I don't blame you for holding on to the future yard decor, with the hopes that you will get the yard done soon.

    Steve - I never look at my jr. high and high school yearbooks, but I never even thought of tossing them until you mentioned it. They are in a box out in the garage.

    Marie26 - I started doing that with old tennis shoes, old jeans, and old tee shirts. I kept saving them for "dirty projects". I finally realized they were just adding to the clutter so I kept one of each and tossed the rest. It felt great and I've never missed them.

    Mustangs - this might be why I always see so many religious books at Goodwill!

    My DH has the biggest thing he should toss (or, rather, SELL), but won't - his 1995 Jetta. It hasn't run in 2 years and sits in our garage. I know he's just procrastinating because he doesn't feel like fixing it. Now he claims he's keeping it in case DS (16) wants it. I absolutely hate how it just sits there and he won't even try to fix it. It's a huge sore spot between us right now.

    Sheryl

  • anrsaz
    18 years ago

    2 extra full-size bed comforter sets. They're too nice and too expensive to give away. Waiting for my dd to change her mind and use them.

  • steve_o
    18 years ago

    My DH has the biggest thing he should toss (or, rather, SELL), but won't - his 1995 Jetta. It hasn't run in 2 years and sits in our garage. I know he's just procrastinating because he doesn't feel like fixing it. Now he claims he's keeping it in case DS (16) wants it. I absolutely hate how it just sits there and he won't even try to fix it.

    I may have related this story on this forum a few months ago, but one time we were asked to help move a family in our circle of friends. When we got there, inside the moving van was an old rusty VW beetle which had existed in that state long enough to serve as a planter (!). He had moved it here and planned to work on it "someday" and now he was moving it to their new place. I wonder whatever happened to it. I don't know if it's sitting in some garage out West; the couple divorced not long after the move.

  • wannadanc
    18 years ago

    On the subject of high school annuals - I no longer have my own - they disintigrated in an out building years ago - but I taught high school for 30 years and bought an annual every year....even had kids sign them - LOL. I certainly don't look through them now - BUT I keep them - as often I use them as reference - when some former student does something awesome that makes the news and I need to remind myself of this and that. Of course, looking back at old faculty photos IS pretty amusing.

  • intherain
    Original Author
    18 years ago

    Steve - there might be a divorce in MY marriage if my husband actually put this car in a moving van to move to a new residence!!!!

    Sheryl

  • runninginplace
    18 years ago

    I have to fess up to some of mine, since I (ahem) seem to tend to blame my husband for too much clutter!

    -A hand painted oversize tshirt. It was made by an artistic young neighbor who befriended us when we first moved to our house 17 years ago. Tragically, she died very young a year or so after we met her. I have not worn this shirt in ages, nor will I ever wear it again just because it isn't my style anymore. And yet I feel this vague guilt about getting rid of it.

    -A nightie/robe negligee set. I bought it long, long ago with the idea that every couple should have some sexy lingerie. Well. I wore it once (and as my husband would say, for only 30 seconds ;) and haven't put it on again. But when I made my first pass through the closet the other day I hesitated. Why? Do I suddenly think that now that we've been married even longer I need it even more?!

    -A battered paperback copy of Ann Lindbergh's Gift from the Sea. I don't even know where I got it, and this Christmas I gifted myself with the new and very lovely 50th anniversary edition. And yet I feel like I shouldn't get rid of the old copy. Why????

    -A quilted ring box my MIL gave me when my daughter was born, as a very nice gesture ('mom should get something, not just the baby'). I wear almost no jewelry, and the only rings I own are my engagement and wedding bands-which live on my finger and don't come off. And yet, I feel like it would be wrong somehow to get rid of this box I've faithfully lifted and dusted around for 14 years-but never used once for its purpose.

    Those are just a few of the zillions of this kind of item I have around. Why oh why do I let myself have this false sentiment about *things*?! I call it false sentiment because I quite literally never use, enjoy or even look routinely at all these objects. They just take up space in my home. They clutter my view. But there is some kind of weird emotional hesitation about discarding them because of past gestures, thoughts or events that keeps me from doing what I know I should-toss!!

    Ann

  • quiltglo
    18 years ago

    This sounds pretty tacky, but when I moved up to Alaska I couldn't afford to move stuff. I could only send 6 boxes by UPS, so I really, really had to pick.

    I made up a box I call my deathbed box. Stuff I want to look at one more time when I'm on my deathbed, but don't want it cluttering up my space. That's where I have the school yearbooks, kindergarden graduation thing, that stuff.

    I've since made boxes for everyone else in the house (don't call them deathbed boxes, though) and things my DH can't part with like his music from high school band (we're 50) goes in the box.

    It gives a justified space to some of those items we can't part with.

    Ann, give away the old copy of Gifts from the Sea. If someone hadn't been generous enough to donate their copy, I would have never had the pleasure of reading it.

    Gloria (my two items are my grandmother's moth eaten wool coat and a coat I made with all kinds of jewels. Don't need them, but not ready to pitch yet)

  • talley_sue_nyc
    18 years ago

    ann, wear that sexy negligé--now that you've been married this long, you might get to wear it for more than 30 seconds! Some time when the kids are out of the house and you can "slip into something more comfortable."

    Oh,a nd some of those things call for photographs, don't they? A nice 5x7 of that T-shirt, in a frame or on a scrapbook page with a pic of that girl, a pic of her house and yours, and anything else that will remind you of her.

    Would that make it easier?

    Oh,a nd the ring box? I promise, you'll feel sooo much lighter (and closer to MIL) when it's gone.

  • runninginplace
    18 years ago

    "ann, wear that sexy negligé--now that you've been married this long, you might get to wear it for more than 30 seconds!"

    Ah but Talley Sue, that would depress me immensely...my husband means it in a very complimentary way when he says a sexy nightie should only be worn 30 seconds (blush blush). After 20 years I could probably wear that sucker for days!

    Seriously though, you are right. My latest echoing Talley Sueism is 'prime real estate'. That ring box takes up some on my dresser, the clothes I never wear take up ultra-prime space in woefully limited closets etc. And quiltglo you are right too of course-Gift From the Sea should go to someone else to discover.

    Thanks for the gentle pushes-and the permission to let go of some of these random things cluttering my house and life.

  • talley_sue_nyc
    18 years ago

    I know what your DH means--but there's something to be said for anticipation, right? And now he's had enough 30-second situations he might be able to sit there and look at you, as you putter around mixing him a drink, etc., in the living room w/ the lights on low? Like some '40s movie star?

    I was thinking 30 to 45 minutes, tops. C'mon, try it--"excuse me, honey; I'm going to go slip into something more comfortable"

  • marie26
    18 years ago

    Quitglo, although saying "deathbed" is an odd way to put it, that is really what my "must keep" bin is. It finally makes so much sense to me of why I need to keep those items. It really is all just memories, but memories of times I do occasionally have a need to look back on.

  • intherain
    Original Author
    18 years ago

    Talley Sue and Ann, I'm dying giggling here about how long the neglige should stay on, especially as you "as you putter around mixing him a drink".

    I finally helped DD "see the light" and she is actually tossing!!! I am so excited! So when I helped her remove stuff from the top shelf of her closet, I found clothes *I* had stashed up there for her (that she didn't want, that my MIL bought her). Ooops.

    I'm tossing, I'm tossing! It feels great!

    Sheryl

  • Julie_MI_Z5
    18 years ago

    Sheryl,

    I know what you mean--one of the hardest things for me was letting the kids toss clothes that fit but they refused to wear. We used to clean closets and drawers and make 3 categories:

    Fits
    Doesn't fit
    Fits but don't like it and won't wear it (much of which was still brand new).

    Now we try to only keep the "fits" pile and everyone is much happier!

  • runninginplace
    18 years ago

    Sheryl, I have to admit it makes me giggle to think of the look on my husband's face if I came strolling out in the negligee...not to mention the look on MY face once I got a good look at myself in the mirror! I must have bought that thing 15 years ago and although fortunately I haven't gained a lot of weight since then, I will just say gravity is not a woman's friend and leave it at that. I don't know if I could even get the thing on anymore.

    And unfortunately too, the only drink I could putter around and prepare for him would be a tall Gatorade on the rocks :). My guy is a complete teetotaler who, believe it or not, has quite literally never drunk a drop of liquor in his life. Luckily I keep the average up for both of us...

    Ann