The perfect putdown - says what needs to be said, but not unnecessarily or over the top rude.

I recently allowed to let a realtor look at my house to give me a balllpark estimate what it would be worth if I didnt finish the gazillion little unfinished things I need to do - I was curious and he offered in a way that suggested he would do it as a favor to me. He proceeded to completely insult my house and quizzed me about why I did this, why didn't I do that, rattled off all the gutting and new windows and crap that would just HAVE to be done.... then gave me some lowball number off the top of his head followed by he knew someone who would take it off my hands. Yeah right!

Yes, definitely good for you!!!

There must be something about these two-bit contractors who fix chimneys. We had a "reputable" two-bit contractor quote on and then repair a brick chimney on a 60s house...he used a contrasting brick because some of the (now rare) original brick had deteriorated, and did a competent job.

He also carefully stacked up all the OK original brick that he'd removed/replaced, and sent his lad around early (6am) one morning shortly after the job was completed to pick up the brick. Er, NOT - I sent the kid away with a flea in his ear, and those spare bricks came in very handy over the years for minor repairs. Bluidy crooks: that's called THEFT, lol.

sent his lad around early (6am) one morning shortly after the job was completed to pick up the brick. ... that's called THEFT

Talk about jumping to a conclusion!

Unless you told him something to the contrary, where I come from that's called CLEANUP

***

As for the other posters, yes, it's a quirk that a lot of poor salespeople have. They think insulting your home is the way to your heart (and wallet).

On the other hand, when I was a real estate broker, I once gently suggested to a Vendor that the rental property she was selling could use some TLC. "Yeah, it's a pigsty. You could grow potatoes on the floor," she responded.

Nice try, worthy, but no, in this case it was theft. Job was completed, site was cleaned up, bill was paid, and the contractor was just chancing his arm, and the kid knew it.

Thank you for the laugh OHL!!

*Crickets* back ;)

Our last roofing job, the contractor asked us beforehand if he could salvage any decent slate he removed from the roof. I'm assuming he knew it was a good many and he was one of the few local roofers who did slate regularly, and I'm sure the price was adjusted to give us credit for what he salvaged. That's the proper way to address who gets what after a job. Salvaged antique brick/barn siding/slate beams are not 'clean up'. They're valuable commodities.

I had a guy out to look at a tree we're thinking about either pruning back or taking down. He proceeded to tell me he'd prune it but you know this tree is going to get HUGE and you'll just have to take it down later. Yeah, dude, I know trees grow and eventually it will be too big for the space. I planted this one 22 years ago, matter of fact. Then he looks around at the rest of the yard and says "What's the deal with these silver maples?! That one is SO close to the house!" It's about 15 ft. away and not a big tree (12" diameter, maybe). "You should take off those lower limbs, those are just going to get HUGE!" They're about 3" diameter - not exactly taking over the neighborhood. "That tree will scrape the shingles off your roof!" You can see light between the tree and the roof line because I just pruned it back so it doesn't touch.

I think this guy just goes around telling homeowners these tall tales about how terribly dangerous their trees are to drum up more work. I told him I'd let him know.

Not very long ago a breakwall restoration company did my next door neighbours wall with pre cast concrete shapes. He told me he could do my wall while he was here and give me a deal since he had all the machinery on site.

He offered to take away my granite/ limestone armor rock away at no charge. The stuff people in the city pay for by the pound for landscaping features. Each rock about 4'X8' each, and 100' long 6 layers high. Covered in fossils.

Yes I guess you would take them away!

About $75,000 at a buck a pound, and that was 20 years ago prices. What a scrap deal!

I think I should get into the granite business.

@southerncanuck - you're not in the Ottawa Valley, are you, lol? That's a great story - thanks for sharing.