gweekie - Sparksal, welcome to Minnesota! (another "neighbor") I agree with you 100% with all the issues you raised. Here's to getting everything fixed, a speedy closing, immediate occupancy, and last, but not least, enjoy your new home! Thank you so much and thanks for your personal email! rose - I hear that! Selling the house has killed my back; I was glad it hasn't sold yet as moving twice would not do me any favors. They do a lot of good things with hips these days, unlike back surgeries where everyone I've spoken to that's gone in is as bad or worst. I haven't met one person that's felt better after back surgery. Hopefully once you are settled you can take care of it. I'm hoping the hip replacement fixes the problem with my back. The orthopod in Tucson, as well as my physiotherapist think that b/c my hip is so stubborn and doesn't want to rotate, that my lower spine is picking up the slack and that's why it hurts so much. I have also heard from others who had the exact same problem that their back issues completely disappeared after having the hip replacement. Glad to hear things worked out. Any clue as to why it tripped in the 1st place? I'd imagine there is too much stuff on one breaker. I imagine it was too much on the breaker. From the photos in the garage attic, the tonnes of extension cords and no junction box probably overloaded it. It's all almost over. It's been a really long few months for you, I'm sure you miss your hubby and are looking forward to spending some quality time with him in your new house. Yeah it has been a long haul and I've missed him alot. My BP has remained normal since I went on those meds. My doc in Tucson wants me to stay in them for a few months til things settle down and then get monitored to hopefully go off them once I find a doc here. kjmn - sparksals, another welcome to MN to you! I usually only lurk on these boards but I just wanted to let you know that I've never heard of a seller staying in a home after closing. It's not customary to do that here at all. Of course you would never wish the seller any ill will, you merely want to purchase what the seller has represented to you in the first place. Good luck to you and happy gardening - spring will be here before you know it!! Thanks KJ. I certainly don't wish the seller any ill will. She has just been extremely difficult and dramatic. All I wanted was to ensure that the seller has properly represented the home when the inspection determined things were not disclosed. pattycakes - I guess we can't expect everything to be all ice cream and roses, eh? Honestly, I did expect dissenting opinions, because as was stated upthread, that is the joy of a free country with freedom of expression and opinions. kgwlisa - I think you're right and the reason people may have reacted negatively to your post was because you called this seller a "dickhead" even while painting a picture of her that was sympathetic to some posters here. Fair enough. I dealt with a true dickhead seller. He used all kinds of manipulative tactics to squeeze every dime out of us that he could (in a hot market). He played mind games at every turn, "lost" the certified check earnest money (10% of the house price, certified check is not customary because it is held in escrow and will clear before anything can happen but his ambulance chaser brother lawyer insisted) that then took a month to replace while entertaining other offers even after he accepted ours and in general was a complete horror to deal with up until the final moments of closing. That sounds horrible! I hope there were no unfortunate surprises after you closed on the home. This seller isn't a dickhead. She's in a really bad spot, my guess that she didn't have the money to do the repairs is spot on and the repairs turned out to not be nearly as big a deal as you initially thought they were. As I said before, you had every right to stick to your guns, but there was no reason to be unkind toward this woman and I do believe that attitude is what some people reacted to. JMHO. I totally understand she is in a bad spot. I've been in bad spots before, even with my most recent house sale in Tucson. Prices were dropping FAST. No lookers, lots of stress anticipating showings and nothing happening. Fear of losing a boatload of money that would put us in aposition of not being able to afford another home. Fear that we'd get a difficult buyer (we were very lucky, she is very nice and loves the house). Fear that something would be discovered at inspection that we didn't know about that could kill the deal. Fear that her financing would fall through. But, with all that, I cooperated. I didn't have my realtor tell hers that I was in a tizzy and to not ask any questions. I disclosed everything honestly. I cooperated with the process and did not draw things out. I wanted my house sold in a difficult market. I do understand she's going through a difficult time, but the least she could have done was been at least a little bit cooperative. I was patient yet frustrated and came here to vent. I was worried about the HI and that the home was not honestly represented. I honestly believe my feelings have been completely justified. Luckily, it seems everything is going to work out. I have never had such a drawn out negotiation process before in my life. marieta - it certainly is stressful. I can totally relate! Good luck in your closing and your new condo! mfbenson - Okay, but that's an insult to the term "DIY". I do my own wiring when necessary and it is always at or above code. Then again, the only terms I can think of for the kind of wiring job you describe aren't politically correct. Sorry, didn't mean to insult DIY for people who are absolutely capable of doing those projects. When it comes to DIY'ers who are in over their head, like I think this previous owner was, that is what I meant. cearbhaill - What flummoxes me is than no one thought to flip the breaker on the garage electrical before everyone got all in a tizzy! That would have been almost anyone's first thought. Rose is right. I think I used the wrong terminology. It was because of the overloaded circuits/plugs in the garage attic. gweekie - Sparksals, there is really good health care in the twin cities and I encourage you to get this checked out once you move. I am having a partial joint replacement in my left hand this coming Friday - had the same procedure on my right hand in June, and it has really made a huge difference in my life! My only regret was that I didn't have it sooner. Also consider checking out the Mayo Clinic in Rochester - which is where I had my surgery. good luck with your surgery gweekie! That's next on the list once we are settled - to find a GP and then an orthopod. This is one of the pains of moving to a new city. It took me over a year to find my GP in Tucson. Hope it doesn't take that long because I don't think I can tolerate waiting another year for this surgery. kec - I've heard great things about the Mayo. I will definitely check it out. It was in the 40's last week and dipping down to -2F midweek. My poor pups are going to be freezing again. Poor things. Right now, I'm occupying myself tryign to figure out paint colours for the masterbedroom and kitchen. I was going to put new carpet in, but decided to hold off. I hoped to put it in prior to the move to make things easier, but as always with buying a house, that makes money a bit tight and with the weather, I don't want it ruined by the movers walking in and out, even if they can put down runners.

Things have gotten crazy and out of control at the moment. A week ago Friday I agreed to meet with SM to go for a walk and talk about what is going on with kids and ex. SM is insisting that none of this is her fault and it is all the craziness of ex. Ex was taking meds for anger management issues and after feeling very depressed while on them, he suddenly quit taking them after moments of severe depression that included threatening suicide. The rest of the story of how things have happened have reminded me of how things were eleven years ago between ex and I. Things were not great but did I think they were bad enough that he would go home for a visit and come back telling me that he wanted a divorce?? No. Anyway, to make a long story short, I told her that as much as I feel her pain that I cannot be involved with this and that I never should have let her convince me to meet with her the first time. I thought that by understanding what was going on that I could be more supportive to DS. But in the end, it has made a lot of pain and bitterness that I never want to feel again resurface. I will admit, in many ways, I truly want her to feel the pain that she caused me but I do not want to be that bitter person anymore because I know that I am better than that and I deserve more than that in life. I was so bitter and hurt and angry for so long and now I feel free but bringing it all back has not been easy for me. I know that it is wrong to wish them the worst and I should forgive and forget and I have managed to do that for so long. I am trying to do that but I cannot as long as she is pretending to confide in me about what is going on. I do not think that she is being totally truthful about the whole thing anyway but passing the blame onto ex completely when I know from DS how often they fight and how SM hired a private investigator that caught ex with another woman. And I know that this woman was not the first nor probably the last. Anyway, now the SM is taking this that I have been nice to her for all these years only to find out that I have wanted ex back the entire time. For many years I was not nice but realized that I was only feeding the anger inside of me and making things worse on DS. So I learned to let it go and that the problem was not with me but ultimately the lying, cheating @$$ that I was married to. I have tried repeatedly to tell SM that I know exactly what ex is and I would never live through that again but SM still insists that if I did not want ex back that I would not be feeling all of these emotions. I told her that in ten years after ex broke her heart to try to listen to the new soon to be ex SM telling her about how the ex is doing the same thing again and try not to relive all of the pain that she experienced the first time (this was just the first time that I let my anger get a little out of control). Then she had the nerve to tell me that she thought that so many years ago that ex and I were separated when they got together. I had to call BS on that one because 1) she was calling my house until I had the phone disconnected because I was tired of getting hang ups when I was home and she thought that I was supposed to be at work and 2) my ex SIL covered for them and she knew we were not separated. After I found out for sure that she was TOW, I confronted SIL who told me everything. SIL felt bad for me and was truly beginning to realize the situation for what it was and SM for what she was. So after SM has continued to deny this, I hit the roof and told her more or less that she was getting exactly what she deserved finally after all of these years and that she was realizing that there was finally another SM in the works just like she was at one time. Not pretty!!! I am not sure that I truly want anyone to have to experience what I went through but I spoke before I thought about what I was saying out of anger. But it truly felt good to vent to one who caused so much pain in my life after all of these years. SM told me that she did not understand why after all of this time that I was finally telling her about this. But then I asked her when as she was sleeping with my husband did the three of us ever sit and include me in any conversations to figure out both sides of the story. So this all happened yesterday at the end of the day and I have heard nothing from SM or ex today but DS is supposed to go to ex's house for the night this afternoon. I would never repeat what happened or was said to DS but ex thinks (or so SM told me) that I will turn DS against him through all of this. I have told ex that ultimately I can think whatever I want about ex but I will not push my feelings onto DS. And I will not. DS knows the truth about what happened but I also told DS that I do not think that even if SM had not been in picture that eventually we would have split because we were young and dumb and were not ready to fight for our relationship. Time changes a person and I believe that I am a better person now but I feel that young, immature, scared, insecure woman resurfacing through all of this and I do not want to go there again. And I am not going to let ex and SM take me back there.

Wow, I think I need to print this up for future references whenever I'm feeling put out... You know, your SM didn't ever hold the sobbing at their wedding against you. That's great. But, I'll bet she was a little hurt or puzzled by it - maybe just had too much class to dwell upon it. Regardless, I think your apology to her, even so many years later, really made her day. At the end of the day, I think all SMs just want a little validation. The fact that you stepped up instead of letting the sleeping dogs lie speaks volumes about your character. I'd say your mom, stepdad, and stepmom did something right in having you be the lady you are today. I have no doubt that you will sail through as an incredible SM yourself! Your story also reminds me of my beloved maternal g-father that I lost 2 yrs ago at 93. He lost his wife at 54. She was amazing and beautiful, though I was just a young child when she died. A couple of years later, he met an amazing woman who was like my g-mother in every sense of the word up til her death, just before my wedding (where she was to act as the g-mother). Only since his death did I realize they were an item, lol, when my dad told me that he and my mom had at one time pushed them to marry. My mother said, "I made up my mind when I had to meet her that I wasn't going to like her. How could I? My mom hadn't been gone all that long and I wasn't going to like any woman in Dad's life. But, I couldn't help but LOVE her immediately..." I often forget that this woman was like a SM to my mom. I think I'm the first SM in the family, but really that amazing woman was. Thanks for letting me recall a few fond memories... All the best on your journey, Dana

You all are so kind! Thank you so much! Your words mean more to me than you can ever, ever, know. I do feel better now that the decision has been made. However, today we went tile shopping and now we are both completely gun shy of color. If it has the slightest hint of yellow in it... it is out! We are also second guessing the use of Spanish tiles now. Although I only showed you the field tiles, there was also a behind-the-range and an around-the-hood deco tile arrangement. We are now thinking that no colorful tiles at all are on the order for the day. Now, this is day one mind you, of the new tile search. We spent half of today at it, and haven't seen the answer yet. But I will keep you informed of our progress. We have a few samples on order and we will see what comes of it. I really can't thank you enough!