Laurensmom2010, I think you are making a wise choice. Good for you for being brave enough to CANCEL. The first time you posted I had a sense of fear that you were making a mistake. I wanted to be supportive but I could tell you did not want this. You are good to go with your instinct. Then you posted later on about the red apples in the sink of one of the pictures I posted. I knew right then you needed to cancel. I am soooooooooooo glad you have. You are not alone in trying to find the right stone. It took me months to find the right stone. DH ended up making plywood tops. Partly because he wanted extra support under the granite but also because I could not choose a granite. We need a place to prep for dinner and place the kids could make their lunches. We lived with the plywood while I took days off to shop for granite. We spilled coffee, chocolate, wine, spaghitti sauce and joked that we did not need to worry as the counter could be replaced for under 50 bucks. The humor and family kidding/support kept me going. At first I felt pressured to go out and buy something. Anything! But as time went by I knew the important part was going at my pace. Choosing something I could love for a long time. I ended up with Virginia Jet Mist and I have no regrets. I am glad I waited until I found the right installer and the right slab of granite. You will find the right counter. You did a wise thing by cancelling the order so that you can take your time and enjoy the process. Not feel pushed into something you know in your heart is not going to make you happy. ~boxerpups

I read through the OP & some of the posts, but stopped at this one & had to respond before I continue on with reading the rest of the posts. (so forgive me if I missed something that was posted after this) "Why can't you respect someone who works 2 jobs (see your first post)? What is not to respect about that? Did anyone notice this comment????" I noticed it. My first thought was "at least she's working". I've also had similar difficulty with my own feelings/judgments, etc regarding my SD12's BM. She is 38 and has never worked a real job. She was lucky enough to get a minimum wage office job, instead of fast food... but a real job that gave her some good responsibility, but she screwed that up by stealing from her boss & ended up being convicted of embezzelment. Now, at 38+, how is she ever going to work & support herself? I stuggle with judging her for that because I have worked since I was 14 and often worked 2 jobs to support my kids... she sits on her backside all day, thinking of ways to get others to take care of her. Our values & lifestyles are such a stark contrast to each other, I cannot relate to her at all. It's much easier to judge & criticize her than to try & understand something I can't begin to comprehend. Just as I can't understand her relationship (or lack thereof) with her kids... I loved kids, I wanted kids & when I had my kids, I live for them... there's nothing I wouldn't do for them. I can't count the sleepless nights, how many miles I've driven to do things for them, everything I've gone without so they can have. So, I don't get someone that lets her child run around in the cold with shorts & no shoes. I don't get someone that relies on others to be taken care of when I know eventually, those people will be gone. and what bothers me most, which really ISN'T my problem, is that she is modeling her "everyone should take care of me" lifestyle to her daughter... and if falls back on me & DH. I wonder what it will be like when SD is 25 & has kids... can't keep a relationship together (like her mom) and comes back to us for help. She won't go to her mom because her mom is already nearly 40 and can't even get a minimum wage job because she's a convicted thief. I guess in a way, my opinion or judgment of BM could be seen that I think I'm better than her... and there is some truth to it. I am proud that I supported my kids, raised my kids, and would do anything for my kids. If I were a BM that wouldn't work, fought supporting my kids, let someone else raise my kids & made excuses every time my kids needed something or wanted me to come to one of their things... then I would feel like a loser. But, that comes from MY perspective from the parent that I am. I can't understand what someone else feels when they do things so differently. There is no shame in manual labor at any age. There is no shame in an honest day's work at any age. I can only imagine that someone "at her age" chooses to be a waitress because she may enjoy the interaction with customers... she may be a bus driver because she enjoys being around kids & likes the schedule. It's not always about the money or prestige. My aunt started a landscaping company at age 55 when she divorced her husband. It's something I would never do but she enjoys it. I gave up a secure office job with benefits to have the freedom of self employment but sometimes, when the phones don't ring for days & the bank account starts dwindling... and I don't have my bi weekly paycheck to count on, it's scary but I love what I do so it's worth it to me. I try to understand SD's BM... not working, etc. I imagine she enjoys each day, sleeping in & playing games on her computer all day without a worry in the world. I couldn't do it, but I am getting better at seeing another perspective.

Thanks for the input. I lean toward the Raven and Calacatta, too. (In fact we just told our contractor to put the order in for the countertop). I'm still not 100% sold on the marble tile, though, I originally wanted a carrera that would be more muted, but the tile shop we're using doesn't have anything that looks right with Raven. I just worry that the Calacatta is SO white. When I see kitchens like this: http://bungalowhomeinteriors.blogspot.com/2012/04/clients-home.html my eye is drawn to how cool the tile looks next to the cabinetry. Guess I'm also concerned that the calacatta has more movement in it, which could be distracting. I'm loving the look of this kitchen (also with Raven), but I don't know what the tile is: https://www.houzz.com/photos/south-pasadena-craftsman-traditional-kitchen-los-angeles-phvw-vp~14622889-Pasadena-Craftsman-traditional-kitchen-los-angeles Does anyone regret getting marble backsplash?

UPDATE Well, after much consternation, I finally decided to go ahead with this choice of flooring. I wavered, I tossed and turned, I annoyed everyone I know with my whining. Then it got down to the wire. The tile I had ordered had come in and I had to decide whether to go get it or pay a restocking fee to return it. However, so much else would be delayed if I decided to wait that it became a much bigger issue than just the tile. Then, I talked to my friend who just had to have all the tile in her house ripped up and replaced because of problems caused by poor installation. As horrible as this sounded, she said it was really no big deal. Soooo, I decided that if it turned out that I really did hate it, I would make myself live with it for a year or two and then tear it up and replace it. That would give me plenty of time to pick out something I really loved. I would chalk it up to an expensive lesson. Well, yesterday, they laid the tile (grout comes tomorrow), and . . . I LOVE IT! It's even prettier than what I remembered from the store. It's much warmer and I think it will look great with my cabs and counters. It blends in beautifully with the wood floors and paneling everywhere else. I had it done in a running bond pattern, which looks perfect. I'm still a little concerned that this stone wasn't the best choice for a kitchen (honed and unfilled), but at least I love the way it looks. And, I still have the option of tearing it out down the road if upkeep becomes too much of a hassle. I can't tell you how relieved I am. Thank you all for your reassurance during my little crisis! Pics to come after the grout is in.... :)