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Someone recommend a book please.

Posted by Ludene (My Page) on
Mon, Mar 4, 02 at 2:46

Please, someone recommend a book to help a friend. She is going through a depression that she needs help with. I am not sure if she is going through early stages of menopause or if she is truly going through a loss of what she once knew. Probably both. This forum seems to be the place that I need to come to. There are so many different things that are contributing to the problem. Her husband's work laid 99% of the people off. He is out of a job there. They moved to a different state where the work is more available. She left her nice home, friends and everything that is familiar to her. Now her husband has taken a job that requires him to gone Monday through Friday. His salary dropped less than half. She is afraid now. She has two really nice boys.
Right now she writes that she feels so alone. She feels abandoned and lost. She grieves for her friends that she left behind and the place that she called home. I know how I got through feeling alone when I got a divorce. It was by books about relationships ending. They referred to my thinking as an addiction and how when I was alone, how the infant part of my mind would kick in. That is when you are a child and left alone, that you will cry to make sure you are noticed and not left behind. You wanted someone to pick you up and make it all OK. It is nature. I felt very much that I was never going to validated and would be left behind. It does make you cry like a baby. The book "How to Break Your Addiction to a Person," helped me a lot. And "Women Who Love Too Much." This all made so much sense. But her husband loves her very much. He talks about her with the most love. Not when she is around either. He is worried about her too. Can anyone tell me of a book without the psycho babble and where it is easily read and understood. She needs to know that being alone is not a death and is not the end. Seems when I try to write her about it, it isn't as clear as it can be in books. If any of you read a book that made you start seeing things different, please tell me. I am trying not to give her a book about relationships ending with a spouse. Those are the books that helped me most I am trying to keep her calm. And as a whole, she is incredibly strong. This is not like her at all. Thanks! Lu

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: Someone recommend a book please.

Dr. Phil has a lot of good books and very easy to read and understand. I would try to check on some of them. I have a few but they are on a different topic. She should try to meet new people at church or other functions to stay busy and make new friends, but I would imagine it is hard to leave everyone especially family.Good luck.

RE: Someone recommend a book please.

"Feeling Good" -- the author is Burns (can't remember the first name. It deals with being able to think about life problems in a rational way. This book is well-written, easy to read, and practical -- not psycho-babble.

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