My husband isn't interested in me but masturbates & watches porn!
lonelyheart
14 years ago
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asolo
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14 years agolast modified: 9 years agoRelated Discussions
I'm not a neat cook and my sink isn't that big!
Comments (48)I REALLY wish GW had better search features - like, a lot of people here know your kitchen plans, while others (like me), don't. Sorry. It sounds like you live on a farm and want a country kitchen. Well, I'm from the Northeast - and Soapstone has been used here - in farmhouses - for CENTURIES! Ditto wide plank pine floors. That being said, if you are going with dark cabinets, it may be too dark for your tastes. Personally, I LOVE retro tiled countertops, but a LOT of people hate them because grime gets in the grout. If you go with tile make sure NOT to use white grout - impossible to keep clean (even if sealed). I love wood counters too, but still I would never put them next to a sink or stove - I really want to be able to put a hot pot on my counter without needing a trivet. And, well, even though I am obsessed with Tung Oil, and yes, it has been used for centuries to waterproof boats, it will need to be re-applied too often if wet dishes are left on it - therefore it is more work than I intend to do in my new kitchen. My main countertops will be soapstone or concrete simply because they require the LEAST amount of maintenance in the long run and only get better with age and wear. If you like gray but soapstone is too dark, ordinary gray Portland Cement (no color added) works, but it is more modern. Ground / wet-sanded to a fine polish and dirt won't get stuck in the pores. I'm not even planning on sealing mine if I go that route - why bother - I have no intention of re-sealing it at a later date. And hey, if sidewalks aren't sealed and I'm not planning on walking with muddy boots on my counter, any "dirt" will only add to the patina! I also LOVE stainless counters with integrated sinks - but they are expensive. My Grandmother had this as the countertop on the sink side of her kitchen and butcherblock everywhere else - it was a VERY country kitchen with pine cabinets and brick floors and it worked! This is by far the LEAST maintenance countertop choice. I'm going to have to compare costs of this vs. soapstone with a sink cut-out - it might just work out to be the same cost, but I already have a lot of stainless, so it will probably feel too cold in my kitchen. If I go with charcoal grey base cabs, maybe, if I go with stainless base cabs, no way! As for sinks, do yourself a favor and get a big DEEP sink! But fireclay or porcelain enamel over cast iron is NOT the best choice - chips too easily. I actually have a giant antique Art Deco double-bowl sink with a drainboard that clips over either bowl; one bowl is 8" deep, the other is 15" deep - but I really don't want to put it in the new kitchen because it already has a couple nicks in it and I don't want to have to worry and carfeully "place" my dirty pots and pans in it. I think I'll just buy a big stainless farmhouse sink instead and not worry about ruining the finish....See MoreWhy isn't my house selling?? What to do now?
Comments (49)Just wanted to post a happy ending update. Shortly after this thread ended, and my new pic were up, we did lower the asking price for sale and rent. Within a week we had 5 more showings for purchase(no offers) but a very qualified renter applied to rent. Unlike my previous tennants who had a very good job, low credit score, BUT always paid their rent on time.. this couple has an excellent income, good credit score and excellent references. They had always owned a home, but were transferred 18 months ago, were planning on it being temporary, so rented. The home they have been renting in Michigan is now up for sale, and I looked at the pictures and they have lovely furnishings, that will fit perfect in my home. I'm very confident it will make the next time I list my home much easier. I have stipulated in our contract a longer 'right to show' clause.. previously 60 days, now 90 days. They stated they might be interested in purchasing at a later date, but are unsure about a future transfer at this point. I would have rather sold the home, but at least we have rental income again- the same amount as I had previoulsy been receiving. And we roll the dice and hope there isn't any further decline in the housing market in the next year or two.. I do always learn by my mistakes! Next time I will insist on better pictures from the start.. besides that.. my realtor really did an excellent job for me, in keeping me well informed of any and all feedback and following up with people frequently. I know those things should just be expected.. but not so much so with my last realtor.. I would definately use her again..just not have her take the pictures!.. and she was very ok with that....See MoreThis isn't really related to my house but....
Comments (18)I think we live in such a toxic world that being cautious about materials in toys, and ingredients in food are so important. I try to buy U.S. made toys and the best food I could possibly find. I even have considered making my cat food and freezing the portions, but unfortunately most of the supplements are made in China nowadays....even people supplements. I'm still looking into it. I had the opportunity to talk with the vet about Thomas a couple of days ago, as I took Bella in to be checked. She is 8 years old and wasn't doing too great after Thomas died. Thank goodness she received a perfect bill of health. She is going through a grieving process as well. She is doing much better now and being snuggly. Basically, the vet said that jaw cancer seems to be more common in dogs, but rare in a cat. There isn't much information as to causes. However, Thomas had some teeth in the past that become infected, and she said that chronic inflammation is a known cancer causer. That poor kitty endured 4 dental surgeries all together to get those bad teeth out, but he was a happy kitty and I'm thankful for the extra time it bought us. At the time, decisions were made with a cat specialist vet to save what looked to be healthy teeth and only take anything out that was infected. In hindsight, maybe taking them ALL out in the beginning may have made a difference. Some cats have teeth issues from day one and when they get them all out do much better. Then again, maybe not. We won't know for sure, and at the time we made the best decisions possible. Unfortunately, jaw bone cancer was something that couldn't be fixed. I am very thankful I have all my other kitties. They are all precious to me, and have been a source of comfort. I have had a hard time sitting at the computer because Thomas would always lie down next to me on the arm of the couch. It has been very, very empty there and it hit me hard a few days ago. The next day one of the kitties parked himself there. Bella came the day after that and satyed with me. There is usually a kitty now when I am on the computer. I am positive that Thomas had something to do with that! Each day gets a little easier...the pain a little less, and the memories bring a smile. There will always be a little ache in my heart though. I miss him. I will always miss him. Sandy...See MoreStepson sexually abusing my son? Husband in denial.
Comments (13)In the special needs community, we have an acronym that everyone knows: DID, which stands for Dads In Denial. Deep down inside, Mom knows there is something wrong with her child, but Dad refuses to admit it, refuses to even consider it. Sound like you've got a classic Dad In Denial. Cole sounds like a very deeply troubled young man, and he's chosen sexual ways of acting out, which spread the trauma throughout the rest of the family. Quite simply, that boy needs MAJOR help, and he needs to be separated from the younger children who are not able to adequately protect themselves. (Is it possible Cole was sexually abused? He's certainly acting out in ways that suggest something of the sort...) Not to minimize the trauma to your son -- but I suspect if it ends now and Cole moves out for a while and gets into treatment, that your son will be able to put it into perspective and move on in a healthy way. But if nothing chages? My goodness - What message will this send your kids? As a parent, you simply HAVE to protect them. You have to. They have to know that you, as a parent, will protect them from harm. If your marriage truly is a good one, I'd send all of the kids out for an evening and have a heart to heart with him. PREPARE your side in advance, because you need to say what you need to say, and having it organized and streamlined may be the only way to make sure it happens. Key points: -- Cole needs MAJOR help. He's been acting out for a long time, but his behavior has taken a turn toward sexually victimizing others. In a nutshell, he is acting like a young sexual predator. Cole needs help and as his parents, you and Dad NEED to see that he gets it - NOW. -- Being in the same house with an untreated Cole is dangerous for your children. Your son has already been damaged, at this point, probably not irreparably, but only because the problem was discovered. Now that you know about it, you, as a responsible parent, NEED to act on it. You cannot ask your son to live under the same roof with the brother who sexually abused him. -- You love your husband, your marriage and your family. After much soul-searching, you have come to the conclusion that to save your family, Cole and your children cannot live under the same roof. And because it would be unbearably cruel to 'abandon' Cole all over again, Dad should take him and move out while Cole starts treatment. You can have family dinners together and still be committed to your marriage and family -- but you need to protect your children. Without Dad's help, the family cannot survive. So either he supports the separation, or you need to pursue a divorce. Best of luck to you -- And please, stay strong for your children's sake....See Moreasolo
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