My husband isn't interested in me but masturbates & watches porn!
lonelyheart
14 years ago
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asolo
14 years agolast modified: 9 years agolonelyheart
14 years agolast modified: 9 years agoRelated Discussions
I am going to show this to my husband.
Comments (5)I'm so sad for you. This does sound intolerable and I think you're right that depression is a big part of it. Sometimes medication will help (and I'm not talking about doping someone up. Sometimes there really are chemical impbalances). But from what you've written it doesn't sound like he would be open to it. If only one person works on this marriage it won't work; that person will be miserable. Are you able to live on your own? Meaning financially. Certainly physically you're able, as you already take care of things at your father's house. If counseling is out of the question for him, you go for you. It'll help you see things clearly, make some decisions, and put together a plan for either staying or asking him to leave. Of course this isn't completely him; I'm sure that there are things about you that make him unhappy (we ALL do!). But since you're apparently the only one wanting to work on things, keep working and get it figured out. Don't wait for him to participate. Suzieque...See Morefeeling abused/used by my husband. is it??
Comments (15)Guess, I'm the odd man out here but I'm seeing this more along the lines of how a guy uses his girlfriend's picture to j.o. Is that all that degrading to his girlfriend even if she doesn't know about it? Bottom line, he's mastubating. He can get up and use computer porn instead like a lot of "normal" guys do, or he can satisfy himself in the shower while thinking of his hot secretary. He can even have an affair if he's not getting enough. There's a lot of ways and things he can use for stimulation or to satisfy his needs. He's using his wife. Obvious, he's not getting enough to satisfy him the normal way. Maybe he doesn't ask, maybe she doesn't give, who knows. Without knowing what their sex life is like, and if she's turning him down or sick or something, it's hard to point fingers too strongly, IMHO....See MoreHusband Not Interested in Sex
Comments (77)Wow,I definetly dont feel alone after reading everyone's thoughts on this.I am 33 years old, and I am to the point where I am very frustrated with my marraige and my husband. I have been married for three years, my husband has no desire in making love to me, or correcting the problem. He tells me he is going to make things better, but it never happens...instead, he prefers to drink his beer every night and go to bed. I have tried to get him to stop drinking, but he is an alcoholic..and it just made things worse, so I gave up. I am so fed up, but I do love him. I am not a cheater, so I have asked myself many times...Do I just need to go ahead and get out? I know three years isnt a long time compared to some of you ladies, but I feel the same way as yall when it comes to the pain and anger. I have cried many times because I feel I am not pretty enough, good enough exct. He had a great sex life with his ex wife...and she is anything but what I am. I have constantly tried to talk to him about it, we have tried the counseling thing, books, lingire, ext. In my past relationship, I was used to being one over, and made love to, but my husband cant even touch me...Uggggh. Im really to young to have to deal with this crap, but I dont want to leave because I love him, and I dont look forward to the pain I will have to go through when I do leave.....This isnt fair. I have tried to just take care of me, and play all the little mind games, but you guys see where it got me. He is laying next to me sleeping, and Im posting in a forum for women with this problem.....I feel sorry for all of us. After all we do for them,you would think that they could give us a little of their time. Geeze. Any more advice on how to deal with this? I have enjoyed reading some of the other posts....See MoreI'm not a neat cook and my sink isn't that big!
Comments (48)I REALLY wish GW had better search features - like, a lot of people here know your kitchen plans, while others (like me), don't. Sorry. It sounds like you live on a farm and want a country kitchen. Well, I'm from the Northeast - and Soapstone has been used here - in farmhouses - for CENTURIES! Ditto wide plank pine floors. That being said, if you are going with dark cabinets, it may be too dark for your tastes. Personally, I LOVE retro tiled countertops, but a LOT of people hate them because grime gets in the grout. If you go with tile make sure NOT to use white grout - impossible to keep clean (even if sealed). I love wood counters too, but still I would never put them next to a sink or stove - I really want to be able to put a hot pot on my counter without needing a trivet. And, well, even though I am obsessed with Tung Oil, and yes, it has been used for centuries to waterproof boats, it will need to be re-applied too often if wet dishes are left on it - therefore it is more work than I intend to do in my new kitchen. My main countertops will be soapstone or concrete simply because they require the LEAST amount of maintenance in the long run and only get better with age and wear. If you like gray but soapstone is too dark, ordinary gray Portland Cement (no color added) works, but it is more modern. Ground / wet-sanded to a fine polish and dirt won't get stuck in the pores. I'm not even planning on sealing mine if I go that route - why bother - I have no intention of re-sealing it at a later date. And hey, if sidewalks aren't sealed and I'm not planning on walking with muddy boots on my counter, any "dirt" will only add to the patina! I also LOVE stainless counters with integrated sinks - but they are expensive. My Grandmother had this as the countertop on the sink side of her kitchen and butcherblock everywhere else - it was a VERY country kitchen with pine cabinets and brick floors and it worked! This is by far the LEAST maintenance countertop choice. I'm going to have to compare costs of this vs. soapstone with a sink cut-out - it might just work out to be the same cost, but I already have a lot of stainless, so it will probably feel too cold in my kitchen. If I go with charcoal grey base cabs, maybe, if I go with stainless base cabs, no way! As for sinks, do yourself a favor and get a big DEEP sink! But fireclay or porcelain enamel over cast iron is NOT the best choice - chips too easily. I actually have a giant antique Art Deco double-bowl sink with a drainboard that clips over either bowl; one bowl is 8" deep, the other is 15" deep - but I really don't want to put it in the new kitchen because it already has a couple nicks in it and I don't want to have to worry and carfeully "place" my dirty pots and pans in it. I think I'll just buy a big stainless farmhouse sink instead and not worry about ruining the finish....See Moreasolo
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