husband doesn't want sex.Can I hear from the men???
cheesecurlgurl
15 years ago
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Just_my_junk_live_com
12 years agolast modified: 9 years agoRelated Discussions
HELP! New boyfriend doesn't want my Weimaraner in bed with us...
Comments (32)Before I tell you the decision that the "Judge & Jury" decided was, "reasonable", let me 1st say, "WOW"! "You're ALL AWESOME"! I cannot begin to Thank all of you for your input, insight & innovativeness! I would love to answer each & everyone of you individually, however, my schedule does not avail.. Therefore, I hope that you are all interested enough to follow-up to check-in to see if I am following up, for I am indeed checking each of your generous posts daily. I did not ever anticipate so much intelligent imput and sincere concern in this matter. People actually do care... I always knew in my heart that there is hope, good & faith in each & everyone after all... I hope if anything else good can come out of this forum for me and everyone else involved is that, we can always find some good in those that we believe fall short of our expectations... Remember, God don't make junk. & Most IMPORTANT OF ALL... "DOG spelled backwards ='s GOD". & May God Continue to Bless You & Yours' each and every day! THE JURY IS IN: I'll keep it plain & simple, It was a No-brainer after all. It really was not negotaible after all. I simply chose my "Partner for life, Maximus". His pawprint is actually tattooed on my left thigh. Some day, I will commission Kat Von D, should I be so fortunate should I be able to afford her services to tattoo his headshot onto my left thigh. I shall remain friends' w/"Great Guy", should he so choose to, I think w/his career schedule and our communication so far, we shall at least be able to enjoy this much for the meanwhile. If he cannot handle this, well then, he wasn't so great after all. I then say, "NEXT"! LOL :) I WILL TRY TO POST A PIC. OF MAXX FROM MY OTHER COMP. IN THE MORNING. A FEW OF YOU REQSTD. THIS. THX. HE'S GORGEOUS!! I give you all my word to try to be their for each of you should you need my advise in the future. Sincerely, Retired NYPD K-9 Unit Det. Sgt. Jo Ann B. & Retired K-9 Unit Maximillion Von B. a/k/a "Maximus" "Big Maxx" (Meine Liebe und Engel!) forever, always by my side... I AM DAMN PROUD TO BE A FREE, INTELLIGENT WOMAN & EVEN MORESO I AM EVEN PROUDER TO BE AN "AMERICAN" AMEN... "IF YOU AIN'T THE LEAD DOG, THE SCENERY NEVER CHANGES..."...See MoreBF son doesn't want to spend time
Comments (2)Hi there, and welcome! Hope you will get some good advice here. Like Justmetoo said, some more background info would be good. But with the info we've got so far I think you shouldn't split up with your fiancee because of his son. Clearly the boy is having a hard time with it, which makes it difficult for everyone, but if you 2 are happy together then I don't see that as a reason to end it. Unless of course your unhappiness with the situation is bigger then your happiness with your fiancee (FDH = Future Dear Husband). How does your FDH interact with him? Would it be possible for the two of them to sit down and have a talk? You could go over it with your FDH and discuss what message you'd like to get across to his son. -For example that you understand how hard this is for him, and that you respect it that he'll need time and space which you want to give him. Nobody is going to force him to play happy family and you are not trying to take over as a mum. -Has your FDH expressed understanding towards his son? I think it is very important that his son feels validated, rather then that his feelings are dismissed or disapproved (I'm not saying that that is happening of course!). Your FDH could tell him that he understands how his son wishes things were different, and that it must be very hard on him. He's been put in a situation that he's had no control over and that's difficult for anyone. However FDH is very happy with you and he wants to move on, ending the relationship because son is unhappy about it would not be the right solution. But maybe they can find a compromise: a way of dealing that everyone can live with. Something like: son will be given time and space when he needs it; so son can stay in his room after school and at night if he chooses to, but he will have to sit at the table for dinner with the rest of you. And normal politeness has to be non-negotiable. By making a compromise you are trying to give him some control over the situation back, I think he needs that. Just like the validation of his feelings. If he feels that his dad wants him to 'snap out of it' (again, not saying this is you guys!) then he'll just become more stubborn in holding onto it and more resentful. Your FDH could ask his son to have a think about other ways of finding a compromise (I'm only aware of him wanting to stay in his room), what is important to son? Get his opinion and get him involved in trying to create a better situation for all of you. Or would it be possible to have this kind of talk as a family talk? Have you tried talking to him yourself? Is this an option? You could all do a brain storm session to try and find new ways to all get along. And how about some small and simple ways of trying to make him feel needed/appreciated: the littlest things (like asking him to open a jar for you when you're cooking and FDH is not home yet) could help in slowly creating a bit better bond or some mutual acceptance. During dinner try and get him talking about his day; show an interest in his life and see if you can crack a joke. There's nothing like sharing a laugh to break the ice....See MoreDaughter 20 doesn't get along with my husband
Comments (20)Regarding the Zoloft comment awhile back -- your daughter should be careful with it if she ever tries it. I tried it for a little bit, but it made me very 'wacky' -- racing heart, very very nervous with no cause. Not something I'd recommend to the casual user. :) That said, I think you need to take it for 2 weeks (or some extended time anyway) for the initial weird effects to subside. Needless to say, I didn't wait to quit. I agree with mom_2_4 and the others -- it sounds from your own description -- unless someone else was raising your daughter, I might have missed it -- that you bought into all this poop by spoiling her when she was younger. Would you take this from a stranger? If not, why take it from somebody that supposedly loves you? There was an article somewhere or another, or possibly just a feverdream I had :) concerning our recent tendency to confuse explainations with excuses. Just because something is understandable doesn't make it forgiveable. Is it understandable that she might be upset with losing a special place in your life? Sure. Does that make acting like a nutcase acceptible? No. And by the way, depending on how 'nutcasy' she's acting you may need to do a little CYA if kicking her out becomes necessary. I've never had to deal with a situation like that myself, so any advice I could give you would be so much hot air, but you might want to look into taking some property-protecting precautions (getting the number of a locksmith, etc), and perhaps even do a little legal research. Just to be prepared, anyway. And finally, I doubt this list is being moderated at the moment. Which is a shame....See MoreHe has kids & doesn't want more - I have none & want to try
Comments (13)I was the one who didn't want kids, but here I am, w/ three little boys of my own. Dh wanted kids - has three grown that he had w/ the wrong woman; I raised my 3 Dear Nephews largely. Anyway, he wanted me more than more kids, I guess, and we wed - I was 33, he was 52. On our third anniversary, we brought home DS #1 - a second followed two years later and an unasked for blessing appeared 2 mos. after I turned 40. My point is that he may change his mind. For me, it was a change when I turned 35 and I saw the damage done to my skids by their BM, and I faced difficulties w/ my DNs as I was not the parent - paid for everything, but wasn't the parent and my hands were tied. My DNs opened up that unconditional love that kids do in a person, and as I got on in age, began to realize that I did want children in my future. Your age isn't on your side, but you've several good years left, so don't panic just yet. Anyway, if you really want a child, then there is a plan for you. This thing called motherhood is a selfless journey, but we need more women called to it rather than doing it for the wrong reasons. Do a little soul searching during this time alone. If you feel compelled to have a baby on your own, then do it. There may be a bigger, better plan for you right around the corner - someone waiting w/ your ideas, etc. Open yourself up to that. Frankly, I'd gladly go it alone rather than be w/ someone who didn't want what was so important to me. And, you are absolutely correct: you WOULD resent him in the future, no doubt. I applaud your courage for ending it rather than trapping this man or settling. For me, having the stepkids would never, ever be able to come close to having my own kids, though we didn't have a great start. My DNs, however, 100% could have fulfilled my motherly instincts. My skids were teens when we married and I came on the scene when my DNs were quite young, so maybe that's part of it. But...those newborn days are just priceless. That baby will be the only thing or person you will ever gladly lay down your life for before ever setting your eyes on him/her... All the best, Dana...See Moremkroopy
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